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SleepyFox_13_ t1_jav1s6c wrote

"Halt, foul beast! You shall threaten this town no longer!" Yelled the ^wannabe hero. He threatened the 8-foot wolfman now huddled in the corner with his Sacred Sword™, a relic that should light up and sharpen itself when faced with evil.

The ^wannabe hero's Sacred Sword™ was... not doing that. It gleamed with all the light a candle yet to be lit, and was roughly as as sharp as a baseball bat.

Carla sighed and went to stand between the hero and the cowering wolfman, she drew herself up to her (unimpressive) height, pushed a stray hair that had escaped her tight hair bun out of her face, with her 'Manager' name tag displayed on the front of her uniform.

"Sir, this is a Wendy's," Carla said as she put her fists on her hips. "Pack up and go home before I call the cops."

The ^wannabe hero sputtered, "But, but, it's a monster!"

The wolfman's ears somehow managed to press even flatter against his head, and Carla could hear a very quiet whine.

"I'm doi-"

"YOUNG MAN," Carla's voice cracked the air like a whip, "That is quite enough out of you. You will leave my establishment at once. I will not allow you to treat people in my establishment like this, if you are looking for an easy mark for your first quest you picked the wrong restaurant."

The ^wannabe hero didn't understand why he was so afraid of this tiny middle-aged woman. But afraid he was, and he slowly lowered his Sacred Sword™ with a bewildered look on his face.

Carla glared at him, "Is this what they're teaching at that worthless Hero Academy these days? To make assumptions based on appearance? To threaten innocent people because you didn't do your research and gotten your facts straight first? Shame on you!"

The ^wannabe hero shrunk in on himself, then mumbled a quick apology and slunk away.

Carla sighed as she placed a hand on Jerry's shoulder where he still sat against the wall. "I'm sorry, I-"

She stopped as Jerry spoke up, "I can't do this anymore, I can't, I can't." He broke off as tears started choking his voice. He reached for Carla, who hugged him back. Her own face was crumpled in sorrow. For some time they sat like that.

"I'm here. I'm here. I'll always be here for you." Carla murmured softly to Jerry. She wished she could say it was okay, that everything would be okay someday, but she couldn't. It wasn't okay, and she didn't know if things would get better. A world with real magic and real monsters, and this is what people waste their energy on.

This wasn't the last time a would-be hero came to pick a fight, but several months later when Carla got hurt by a hero who decided he didn't need a sharp sword since a club worked perfectly fine, they took the settlement money and moved to the borderlands, where it was safer to be different.

Surprisingly, the ^wannabe hero actually reevaluated his life choices up to that point and eventually became a true hero, but that's another story.


Taolan13 t1_javizvi wrote

Best response here, but so late it won't get noticed. Not a huge fan of the use of superscript, but the "Sacred Sword^(TM)" is a genius meta bit.


Zagreus7777 OP t1_javoe5u wrote

Hah! I loved this, the wannabe and TM gave me a good chuckle

Also I want to pat Jerry on the head