"... but it's a rock." Whiskers circled the new pet that had gained so much of their owners attention.

"Yeah, but it's a 'pet' rock." Rags grumbled in clarification.

"But it's a rock!" Whiskers softly slammed his front paw against the countertop.

"Well, like it or not, it stands on the same ground as us." Sighed Rags.

"Heh, we'll see about that. Maybe on the same ground as you, but not me. " Whiskers raised his paw.

"I wouldn't do that while Sally is still here." Rags cautioned.

"It's a rock, Rags. You really think I'll get in trouble fo-"

"Yes." Rags closed his eyes and promptly fell asleep.

Whiskers: -_- [knocks rock off counter]

"AH! WHISKERS NO! NO! BAD WHISKERS!" Whiskers was immediately assaulted with overwhelming artillery. His attempts to dodge the spray bottle were met with equivalent precision and only stopped once he had made it to the hallway, a good distance away from Sally. Sally would pick tenderly lift Archibald onto the counter and place a bandaid on him.

"WE DON'T ATTACK ARCHIBALD!"

"Warned ya." Rags would speak from his slumber.

Coat soaking, whiskers would glare and let out a long hiss. Not at Sally, but at Archibald.

Whiskers: (≖_≖ ) "Be warned 'Archibald', you are not welcome and will never be welcomed here. Sally cannot protect you forever. You've made a grave mistake crossing me and rest assured I will make your every waking moment here a living nightmar-"

"It's a rock, Whiskers." Rags would interrupt and remind him.

"A rock that has crossed the wrong feline." Whiskers would murmur before stalking backward behind the wall and concealing himself in darkness.

°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°

From that day onward, Whisker's daily routine consisted of doing every minor inconvenience possible to make Archibald's life miserable. When Sally would set Archibald to bask in the sun, Whiskers would be right there to slide it into the shade. When feeding time came, Whiskers would tip Archibald bowl over to spill their microwaved air onto the ground.

When they went for walks, Whiskers would whisper lies about Archibald to every rock in the neighborhood. Whisker tail would 'accidentally' repeatedly block Archibald's view during movie nights despite Sally constantly moving it out of the way. Sally would have to carry Archibald through the doorway due to Whiskers body blocking the pet door.

Rags did not mind. It knocked 3 birds out with one stone.

• Sally became more upset with Whiskers.
• Whiskers did not bother him.
• Rags was amused to see what lengths Whiskers would go to.

This would continue until Sally finally had enough and would remove the toys from the playroom before placing Archibald and Whiskers inside.

"I'm tired of you two fighting. Now you two stay here and get along until me and Rags return from the vet!"

^("VET!?") A shrill high pitched bark would sound from the distance.

Whiskers would patiently wait and eye Archibald until he heard Rag's despair signalling that Sally was pulling out of the driveway. A gaze of sinister intent would be fall his face.

"Poor poor Archibald, it's just you and me now. You cannot use Sally as a shield any longer, it seems your luck has run out."

Archibald would not respond.

"To be paralyzed with fear is to be expected. Don't worry, I'll be sure to make your demise painful. Once you are gone, I can focus getting rid of that oversized fleabag."

Whiskers would pick Archibald up between his fangs and use his cat-like agility to leap to the very top of a now empty toy shelf. Whiskers would set Archibald down near the edge.

"Any last words my dense Nemesis?" Whiskers would say with a raised paw.

"Yes you are right to be scared. I've done the math. The first time you fell, you require a bandaid that covered half your body. A fall from this height should easily kill you." Whisker would wait for Archibald to respond.

"Trying to play brave are we?" Whiskers would slide Archibald so that he teetered on the edge. "Uh oh, careful now, one tiny little vibration could end the fun. "

Whiskers would slide Archibald back a safe distance. "Oh you didn't think I'd make it that simple now would you?"

Whiskers would repeatedly slide Archibald onto the verge of falling and then bring him safely back, over and over and over and over, torturing the rock. "Will I do it!?" "Gasp, is this it." "Oh my, you almost accidentally slipped."

Whiskers would at one point perform many jumps while Archibald teetered on the edge, to make Archibald wobble. These jumps would loosen a screw and cause the shelf to sharply slant. Archibald would launch into the air and Whisker would slide to the low end.

Pain would resonate through the one paw Whiskers used to hang on as Archibald landed atop it. [Reowww!] Whiskers would sharply howl. His head would look up to the Rock that not stood on his paw, condescendingly overlooking him.

"No wait! Please, have mercy! I- I leave you alone I promise!" Whiskers would plead.

"What th-! Archibald!" Sally who had returned to retrieve Rag's papers would enter the room to see Archibald perched on Whisker's paw. She would catch them both and set Whiskers onto the ground.

"BAD ARCHIBALD! BAD! BAD! WE DON'T TRY TO ELIMINATE WHISKERS WHEN I'M AWAY! YOU'RE GOING BACK TO THE PET STORE!"

Sally would clench Archibald in her hand and power walk to her vehicle to return Archibald, setting the behind the top of the back seats.

"Woah ... what did I miss?" Rags would question. A little worried at the thought of Whiskers somehow managing to get Archibald sent back.

Whiskers would smuggly stride up beside Rags to also watch the vehicle drive away. "Just me and my brilliant plan in action. Heh, like I said, no mere rock is on the same level as I. Watch out, mutt, you're next."

Sally's car would hit a pot hole in the drive way and cause Archibald to roll against the back window and slightly crack it. Sally would yell something unintelligible while a startle Whiskers would jump high into the air as he saw Archibald swear vengeance against him and scurry into the house.

Rags would chuckle at this until Sally's car briefly stopped. Though this was only because Sally saw an oncoming truck, Rags would take this as her remembering his vet appointment. He took would jump into the air and scurry into the house.