Soulmage

"A competent ruler should be able to navigate courtrooms, block hostile spells, live as her subjects do, understand their work, and lift a spear to protect them. Specialization is for insects," Councilmember Nielnieh said.

The lone insectoid at the table coughed and ruffled her lepidopteran wings. Nielnieh held up both hands in appeasement. "Not to say that the fey are incompetent," Nielnieh hurriedly said. "It is only a figure of speech."

"Words, like, totally have power, dude." The representative of the High Elves was smoking something that made Nielnieh's eyes water, but Xio's skill at thoughtweaving and lightwork was unparalleled. Even if they wanted to exclude him, it was a toss-up whether they'd be able to assemble security tight enough to keep him out. "I bet the kid would love to meet all of us, anyway."

"Point of order." It was an open secret that the slums of Knwharfhelm were home to a thriving goblin population, and even though they didn't officially have a spot on the council, the consequences of denying the street-cleaners and sewerfolk their voice would be... smelly. "We are good at surviving off scraps because somebody forced that life on us. Our 'skills' would be unnecessary if you would approve our education campai—"

"That money is not yours to spend, gutterling," Knwharf ground out. "If we are truly to consign our next ruler to the... tender care... of these animals, are we sure she will come out alive?"

"It will make for good trials," Ratiti growled, a boastful grin on her face. "A leader that survives the warbands is a leader we can trust."

"Then the Council is in agreement," Nielneh said. "Search your peoples and present your candidates for the next to be chosen as leader, and they will face the trials of all those they govern."

A.N.

It's late and this isn't my best writing, but this prompt just seemed like fun. Hopefully you enjoyed, and kudos to OP for the prompt! This story is set in the world of Soulmage, a serial written in response to writing prompts. Check out the rest of the story here, or r/bubblewriters for more by me.

"Elves are terrible magicians, goblins only know how to survive with gold, dwarves will make themselves a good axe right before they die to an elven arrow, and orcs are better known for their insatiable hunger than anything else. And us humans? Most of us are far better at laziness than politics. What were y'all thinking when you came up with this?"

"All new employees of Merlin's Rennaisance Faire Restaurant must undergo the same training process. The whole chosen one thing may seem silly, but it's to get you in the right spirit, you know," said a man named Mr. Sloane wearing a sloppy company uniform as they sat in the HR office.

"Sounds like y'all need to play some more D&D," she said while looking down at the paperwork. "Forget being trained by orcs, I'm definitely taking a human sorcerer and chromatic orbing them into oblivion. Oh, and y'all are missing Tieflings. Don't hate."

"Ma'am, please don't be like this. I'll have you know that we chose you out of ten candidates. You see, you really were the chosen one."

"Oh, like I'm some kind of hero for waitin' tables? Come on."

"But you are a hero. If nobody waited tables then the restaurant would close."

She sighed. "If I had a dollar for every time I heard-. If I'm really a hero then y'all would pay me better than minimum wage," she felt herself getting hot with annoyance.

"Look, the training will only take a half day, and it starts right here. I'm the human in HR who will teach you politics. Bill is our wide-eared kitchen lead and he really is magical. Sarah is our floor lead and she'll teach you how to get through the night-"

"So why y'all call yourselves the council?"

"No particular reason," he looked down at the desk as if he was hiding something.

"Y'all strange." I shook my head. Most restaurants would have had me on the floor already. She debated quitting now, but she needed the job badly enough to go through with it.

"So, let's get started in the training room," he said as he got up. She followed him out of the HR office and down the hallway. Nothing seemed out of sorts until she saw someone that looked like an elf quickly run past.

"What was that?" she asked. He said nothing as they went deeper into the restaurant. Most restaurants aren't this big. Something was wrong.

"Sir," she said, but he kept going. Suddenly afraid, she stopped and turned around, peering into the long hallway behind her.

"Come on!" Sloane turned around, beckoning her.

A man dressed as a wizard came out of a red door nearby. "Tell them they need the portal ready at 5:00," he said into his phone. "I've got elves and orcs in the dining room."

Portal? A portal to where?

"It's only a little further. Come on, we're late" Sloan said.

Late?

She had become suspicious to the point where she considered walking back down the hallway and straight out the door. “No, you've got to tell me what's going on here."

"I can't, you've just got to see for yourself."

Finding this to be a weird thing to say, she decided to follow him. Around the next bend, they walked through a pair of double doors.

"SURPRISE!" her family and friends screamed at once, having thrown her a D&D themed-birthday party on her first day of work.

"And this is the maximum security wing. You'll never be posted here." The Sergeant showed the newbie around. "Wanna meet some of them?"

"Um, isn't that dangerous, sir?"

"Call me Max, kid."

"Sorry, military upbringing, da being a soldier and all that."

"I hear ya. And no, it's not really dangerous." Max opened the door into an oppressive feeling and the newbie could feel like she was being pushed down. "That feeling? Anti-magic suppression field laced with a death charm."

"That sounds really dangerous, sir!"

"Not for us. The uniform you're wearing prevents you from feeling the charm. Everything else in here..."

The doors to the cells were bars like the rest of the jail. But the occupants were cuffed and suspended. Their hands covered by metal casings. It looked more like a torture display than incarceration.

They went over to one cell. The elf behind it looked asleep. "This one tried to open a portal to let in a horde of demons."

The one next to him had a scrawny looking dwarf who was clearly struggling against his chains. "This one killed a lot of children. They never could figure out why."

"AND I'LL DO IT AGAIN!" howled the dwarf. They walked on a few more cells down.

In this one, a woman was there. She was calm. Looked bored even. Like she was queued up at the bakery so she could buy a couple rolls and maybe a sweet roll since its been a day even though she really shouldn't.

The newbie looked surprised. "I... I know her!"

Max nodded. "Quite a few do. The 'Chosen One.' Completed her training and first thing she did was burn a village down to the ground. With everyone still in their homes." Max had an air of jest this whole time until now. Now, he seemed ready to just kill her and be done with it.

The woman looked at him and smiled. "Can you blame me?"

"Yeah, I can! And the whole kingdom!"

"Oh? Which one?" Max seemed stumped for a moment which let her continue full speed. "I learned from them all, you know. From the elves, I learned magic that is abused by every other race. From the dwarves, I learned craftsmanship that had no value except for the food they traded to survive. From the goblins, I learned that living off scraps that the other racers give is technically still living. From the orcs I learned the art of war that they were constantly facing from the other races. And from the humans, I learned the most valuable lesson of all."

She paused for a moment as the guards absorbed the information. "I learned that in the end, everyone is an ends to a means, nothing more. Every race was equally worthless and beneath me. There's a reason I was the Chosen One after all."

As if on cue, she burst through the shackles and bindings, kicking the doors down. Max was immediately knocked out. The Chosen One grabbed the newbie by the throat and started squeezing. In her struggled gasps for air, she managed to ask, "Why? You were supposed to save the world!"

As she started losing consciousness, she heard her answer. "Oh yes, the world. But not its people."

"You'll soon see why we saved the Orcs for last." The voice was of Tinalen, the old court advisor who had been my first trainer, in the land of Humans.

"I think it might have been useful to learn a bit about war when I was dealing with the Elector-Generals." I grumbled aloud, remembering having to fend off dozens of marriage proposals, part of my political training, or so he claimed. "Besides, you taught me how to defend myself, and I've killed before."

"That's a fight, a brawl, combat." He smiled as he produced one of the many daggers he always carried within his voluminous turquoise robes. "I taught you that well enough." I idly traced the scars along my forearm, smiling grimly in agreement. "What the Orcs do is war, child, and not to be played at."

"What's the difference?" I had been taught how to kill in hundreds of ways. The goblins taught me to kill with traps, with poisons, and herbs. I learned to stop a man's heart or rain fire on the battlefield from the Elves. To slip a dagger between the ribs, or hammer them in the Arena of Grudges. How could this be so different?

"The difference is why the Orcs are the most revered race in Kalios, as you well know." Old Tinalen smiled the crooked, calculating smile that had so often accompanied painful lessons.

"Are the First Borne really so terrible?" The Orcs and the First Borne. The Oldest War. The Eternity Struggle. The Wall of War.

"Terrible enough to drive the great magic of the Elves deep into their secret forests and the Dwarves into their mountains." Tinalen sighed heavily, remembering some far off tragedy, as he so often did whenever we spoke of the First Borne. "Terrible enough that we created the Orcs. And Heroes..." He cast a guilty glance at me, the one that made me feel like he was my grandfather looking at his seventeen-year old granddaughter, rather than the Hero of the World.

"Yet you've never even let me see one." I raised the protest that had been the cause of a hundred arguments over the years.

"You weren't ready." He swallowed heavily and looked at me guiltily. "You still aren't. But there's no time. He's coming back and you need to learn how to win a war."

"If the Orcs could teach that, they wouldn't need me." I joked half-heartedly, only to receive a sharp stare and a whispered rebuke.

"Quiet! Do not ever let an Orc hear you speak that way." He whispered with a genuine fear, and I swallowed, shaking my head.

"I was just kidding."

"Not even in jest, child!" He hissed the words. "The only reason you are alive to make such japes is because the Orcs have been dying in the thousands every year to keep you safe." He sighed, as if suddenly weary. "You'll see soon."

"Halt!" A booming voice filled my ears as a figure suddenly appeared on the path before us, silhouetted and disguised by the setting sun behind them.

Stopping in our tracks, Tinalen called out loud, "I am Tinalen of the Twelve Houses and this is Jaless, Elector-General of the Twelve Houses, Tree-Sister to Arch Druid Cosmani, Tall Queen of the Goblin Tribes, Smith Mother to Clan Firehand, Chosen Hero of the Living World and Champion of the Five Peoples!"

I groaned inwardly at the titles that had been heaped upon me and stepped forward, curtsying slightly and tipping my head, the formal greeting for one of unknown standing in the Kingdom. To my surprise, I heard only a guttural laugh before the booming voice spoke again.

"A-hahaha! White as a goat's milk and soft as cheese." The figure stepped forward and I saw it was an Orc, as evident by the deep blue skin and golden eyes, what emerged from beneath plates of gold and black armor. "And a girl to boot."

"Sir Orc, we have done the courtesy of naming ourselves." I grit my teeth and ignored the sexism.

"Sir Orc?" The voice laughed again and the figure leaned down to look me in the eyes, revealing a face as pretty and freckled as any human maiden, the freckles a darker blue than her cobalt skin. "I am Aswin Greatfist, daughter of General Fergut Greatfist."

"Pardon me, Miss Greatfist." I stuttered an apology and straightened as my counterpart roared again with laughter. How was I supposed to know? I couldn't see her face and her armor was pretty unisex!

"Oh, begging your pardon, Miss Greatfist." She laughed and mocked, before giving a sharp whistle. "You're even softer up close, but you're the Hero or whatever, so we'll be your escort."

Suddenly a dozen more Orcs of all shapes were around her, blocking the road. Each had some shade of blue skin and nearly all had golden eyes. They were separated by size and shape, but each wore the same gold and black armor, each decorated with a massive silver fist.

"Commander, we need to move if you wish to see the battle." One of the Orcs, another female, perhaps, spoke in an equally deep voice.

"Then let's hurry. We need to get the Tree-Hugger and Smith Sister and whatever else the softies have named her all trained up." The Orc named Aswin laughed mockingly and Tenalin could only smile in a strained smile of forced respect.

"I know how to fight." I had gone through this in every single nation, and I was already quite fed up with being constantly underestimated. I had fought. I had killed. I had bled and vomited and shit myself trying to hold in my fear while Cave Worms devoured my mining team. I wasn't going to be underestimated by this... savage.

"She knows how to fight, comrades." Aswin's tone remained both humorous and mocking and I felt my grip tighten on the sword on my waist.

"Care to test me? Or have you no honor?" I pulled Sharwin from her sheathe, the cold mithril runes reflecting the setting sun like red fire.

"Fine then." Aswin laughed and shrugged, before turning and hurtling something towards me.

Remembering the lessons in Drawgi's fighting pit, I sidestepped and deflected the hatchet, only to be caught off-guard by one of the other Orc's fist suddenly crashing into my face from the side. Before I could even focus on the new challenger, something struck me on my knees and I fell hard, catching a heavy boot on my chin as I did. While the world swirled around me and I felt darkness overcoming me, I felt something pulling hard at my hair and one of my eyes was peeled open to see the blurred and swimming face of Aswin, leering at me with a cold smile.

"That's how we fight, Tree Mother. Who gives a shit about honor?" With those words ringing in my ears, I fell into a blackness without sound or dream.

The Council Meeting Chamber was a sight to behold. A towering room with vaulted ceilings, stained glass windows, and a mural on the floor leading to the table where the five representatives of the council sat. There were four representatives for every race present in the Council, to ensure nothing would become too heavily skewed in one race's favor and that there would be substitutes on hand should the initially selected representative be indisposed. Today, the Council was called upon to make a decision of great importance: two settlements were vying for a place on the Council but only one would be allowed in.

The guards at the entrance announced, "Presenting Emperor Silas of the human kingdom of Victoria and Chieftain Axe of the kobold settlement of Moonrise." A pair of dignitaries were escorted into the chamber; one a human man in lavish golden silk robes and the other a kobold woman in a simple black cloak with a belt full of pouches tied to her waist. The guards parted to the side once they had reached the end of the hall.

The Council representatives were arranged side by side, each with enough space to themselves to present their weapons to ensure they would not be armed for the meeting. Behind them was an extensive metalworks project displaying the champions of the five races uniting to slay a fallen god. Nestled in the space between Hoka of the goblins and Redwall of the elves were two other people: an armored figure standing upright and carrying the other person, a tiefling girl covered in tassels, on their shoulder.

Octavian of the humans rose out of his seat. "The Council hereby recognizes the request from both parties to obtain a place and presence within our ranks. As there is only one opening, both representatives shall make their case. I, Octavian of the humans, give permission to Emperor Silas to step forward and make his case."

Silas stepped forward with a smile and said, "Thank you, Octavian of the humans. As I'm sure you have heard, the kingdom of Victoria is the greatest military power on the eastern half of the continent. Our weapons are forged from the finest materials, our soldiers are put through the most intense training, and our defenses are crafted to the absolute peak of perfection. And should that not entice you, we are more than willing to share our wealth and resources with--"

Glory of the orcs stood up. "And what will you offer to teach Lady Jericho?"

Silas faltered. "I...who?"

The armored figure piped up, "I am Lady Jericho." The tiefling girl pulled Jericho's helmet off, revealing a young woman with glowing white eyes, grey skin, and long, flowing black hair. "Progeny of the Fallen God and the Chosen One. All races represented on the Council agreed to raise me and teach me in their ways. And you will be asked again: what can your people offer to teach me?"

Silas scoffed. "Surely my entry into the Council isn't dependent on some ash-covered child with an inhuman prostitute on her shoulder."

"Actually, I'm Jericho's fiance, Amber," the tiefling responded. "And if you ever imply prostitutes are somehow unworthy of respect again, I will gouge out your eyes. Slowly."

Siegfried of the dwarves rose from his seat and announced, "Thank you for your time, Silas, now please be silent. I, Siegfried of the dwarves, give permission to Chieftain Axe to step forward and make her case."

Silas adopted an insulted expression as Axe stepped forward. "Thank you, Siegfried of the dwarves. Lady Jericho has learnt many talents from you all over the years. But I must ask: what of stealth, hmm? The humans taught her the art of deception and the goblins and dwarves the secrets of trap-making, but I see no training in the arts of infiltration, scouting, misdirection, or even how to pick a lock. A direct assault can deal with your problem, but so can a well-planned escape. If the Council will allow the kobolds to have a place with them, Lady Jericho shall become one with silence and the shadows under our tutelage."

The representatives got out of their seats as Redwall said, "All in favor of granting Axe and the kobolds entry into the Council?" All as one, the representatives said, "Aye!" As they sat back down, Hoko remarked, "Welcome to the Council, Chieftain Axe. Tomorrow, we will walk you through the steps and process of --"

"THIS IS AN OUTRAGE!" The Council looked at Silas with a mixture of shock and insult. "You're letting these glorified salamanders onto the Council because they offered to teach some--some woman selected by a nonsense prophecy how to be a better thief?!"

Lady Jericho held out her hand, causing Silas to be telekinetically moved into her grasp. "Since you have clearly done no prior research," Jericho growled, "Allow me to explain some things to you. Firstly, there is no prophecy--I am the Chosen One because I was chosen by the people to be raised in love in the hopes I would be better than the fallen god whose corpse I was born from. Secondly, the decision for me to be trained by all races on the Council was a symbolic gesture, a way to demonstrate that people could come together for more than just combating threats and that working to a common goal as one makes us stronger, better. And thirdly, the Council elects representatives of races, not kingdoms. They already have human representatives, so this endeavor of yours was doomed from the start."

"WHAT?! Then why meet with me at all?!"

Jericho glared daggers at Silas. "So you know not to try this again. Now get out." Jericho tossed Silas to the floor, prompting a pair of guards to drag him by the arms out of the chamber. Octavian sighed and remarked, "I just don't understand how someone can go into a situation knowing so little about the people you're meeting with."

Jericho shrugged. "Well, I was born from the dead body of a higher being. Sense has pretty much had its day."

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