YTA.

Orc women are attracted to strength. You are pink and spongy, and would not normally attract the love of a stalwart orcess. You must have appeared strong to her in some way that does not involve the physical, probably being apparently secure in your pink squishiness. You have belied that by being insecure in your obviously weak and insufficient masculinity, and now she's having doubts.

She loves you, and she loves your family. That's why she lifts them at gatherings. Do they mind when she shows them favor with Kor'Spach at your snowtide banquets? My experience with humans is that everyone enjoys a good Spach'ing, as long as consent is gotten and ceremonial handles are used. I assume they enjoy it. She enjoys it. Why do you feel threatened? Orc life was brutal and short until very recent history; the love shown at holidays and gatherings is key to Orc identity. Every one may be the last, and must be feted accordingly. You took away something culturally important to her because you were embarrassed and ashamed of yourself, and you made her embarrassed and ashamed of herself in the process.

She has you playing child's games when you spend seasontides with her family because she needs you to show her that you are the strong man she fell in love with. But those are childish games, for the simplicity of youth, and will never suffice to demonstrate your prowess to her, for you are pink and squishy and insufficiently orc. Instead, you must again show her your strength in spite of your nature: apologize.