"You are banned from this realm, abomination. I demand you leave at once by order of He Who is Most High," the angel-pigeon demanded of the disguised horror.

"Listen, errand boy, I didn't listen to "God" when he told me I couldn't come into his realm that mom gave to him for his birthday and I'm sure as shit not going to be ordered about by one of his little sycophants. Piss off," the eldritch one dismissed the angel-pigeon summarily and went back to playing Flappy Bird on his (or its?) phone. The angel-pigeon was having none of it.

"I am the Archangel Michael! Saint Michael the Taxiarch! He who threw Lucifer from heaven! I will have respect from one who is not of this world and has befouled it with your invasion, Francis!" Pigeon-Michael huffed. It was rather unintimidating as he was just a small pigeon. It would have made Francis the Elder God smirk except he hated being called Francis. He much preferred Frank.

Frank glared for a moment before deftly putting away his phone. This would not stand. Then, like Darth Vader before him, Frank the Elder God held out his hand and telekinetically and spiritually choked the shit out of Michael.

"You little winged rat! I will-"

"Franky! Sorry I'm late, love, traffic was awful," a young woman, clearly out of breath said as she ran up and hugged her boyfriend Frank, the eldritch monstrosity. This distracted him enough to lose his grip on the Archangel Michael who hastily flew off.

"That little vermin got away!" Frank moped. The woman looked confused.

"Were you having a staring contest with a pigeon?"

"It's a long story but that winged rat is my little brother's pet. I hate those things," Frank told his girlfriend. It was all true but he didn't elaborate all of the details for fear of driving his mortal girlfriend to madness. But hey, just one of the hassles of dating, right?