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1

VrinTheTerrible t1_ixirk2s wrote

Andy slowly awoke to the smell of gunfire, a glass of whiskey in one hand and his .38 in the other.

7

Naielli t1_ixirvmn wrote

And as the two stated at each other, they both knew neither one would leave the other alive.

3

Kitty_Fuchs t1_ixisi07 wrote

When the dragon abducted the princess he was surprised that she didn't even try to resist him and seemed to resign herself to her fate almost immediately.

2

mariojardini t1_ixitzs0 wrote

"Fifty years. Fifty years inside this damn cave."

19

IamN8Wright t1_ixiu1y7 wrote

Here was the Void, I stared into it so many times over the years, it was more familiar to me than my own face.

2

Master-Tanis t1_ixiwsgw wrote

It was a bright and sunny morning as we laid Grandma to rest in the bed of her favorite pickup truck.

4

Oneirominid t1_ixj1j9n wrote

"And so, you fell too... how unfortunate,"

9

Potikanda t1_ixj315c wrote

"He's coming for you!" Alice sneered viciously.

3

not-really-here- t1_ixj55gb wrote

Luckily, I've never been one to look a gift horse in the mouth.

4

Paulineig t1_ixj55qa wrote

„But what if space DID exist?“, they said, seemingly deep lost in their thoughts.

3

tiredHFX t1_ixj65js wrote

I was always told in school that penguins can't fly.

3

Metraxis t1_ixj6jiw wrote

Terry said that if you ground the world fine and sifted it all out, you'd not find an atom of Justice, nor a molecule of Mercy. No such effort was needed in the plastic deco hell called Moonbeam Gardens. You could tell just by looking.

1

Gregamonster t1_ixj6uk1 wrote

Just because someone is expendable doesn't mean you should be eager to spend them.

9

CommanderCori t1_ixj7t4t wrote

The sunlight forced its way through the overgrowth to intrude upon my grave.

4

Calligaster t1_ixj86um wrote

Never thought I'd die laughing, but here I am.

4

Ox_of_Dox t1_ixj90w2 wrote

The assassin crept down the hall, careful not to alert the target's guards, but as they rounded the corner, there stood the target themselves

3

AussieBirb t1_ixj9h0x wrote

The color of the sky was an aberration.

1

AverageBeef t1_ixj9yks wrote

Why do you have so many lemons?

4

Realistic_Thought_15 t1_ixja1jl wrote

I entered the tomb for any ancient history to only be ripped through time and am face to face with a sphinx.

1

Mickey_thicky t1_ixjae9j wrote

I stood there in shock as I looked down at the assignment laid on the table before me, wondering how on Earth they’d expect me to complete it; i work for the Culinary Institute of America, not the Central Intelligence Agency.

1

PrincessChard t1_ixjdetw wrote

Surely that was the greatest moment in television history!

1

WaffleGod72 t1_ixjduto wrote

The dragon grinned at my remark, and picked me up.

1

taciaduhh t1_ixjfk4e wrote

Did that corpse just wink at me?

1

Herr_Underdogg t1_ixjfqim wrote

As a lifelong postal carrier little remained that bothered him anymore, but that little girl was just creepy...

1

ArguesWithFrogs t1_ixjghs0 wrote

"The building was on fire & it wasn't my fault."

1

asey_69 t1_ixjhvpn wrote

Yesterday, I died, today, I am alive, and tomorrow...

1

Youngstar181 t1_ixjicc9 wrote

"Life has no meaning, other than the meaning you make for it."

1

DontBother_YT t1_ixjij5p wrote

"You've suffered a terrible fate, haven't you?"

1

runswithdolls t1_ixjinlb wrote

There I was, a doll in each hand, running down the hallway.

1

that_one_wierd_guy t1_ixjjcwf wrote

It was a dark and stormy night, which was odd since it's only two in the afternoon and the weather report said breezy and sunny.

1

yetshi t1_ixjkato wrote

Oh man that's fucked up.

1

Jackamen1952 t1_ixjn48j wrote

Good news the drive works, bad news we can’t go back home.

1

hornylolifucker t1_ixjnxl9 wrote

The floor starts to melt into lava. Only the kids are prepared.

1

sparkdaniel t1_ixjow1u wrote

As he fell he thought, ain't this a prime example of hubris......

1

Biscuitsiren928 t1_ixjp5vv wrote

Man was created in the eyes of God.

Monsters only know how to imitate.

1

imnight234 t1_ixjqmkt wrote

As I stared blankly at the mirror I started to cry as I thought “no not again”

1

Yamidamian t1_ixjr258 wrote

I should probably be dead by now, but as my grandmother used to tell me:

1

awkwardly-confused t1_ixjrlv0 wrote

I could care less who was in front of me, even if it was the god of death themselves.

1

KonradosHut t1_ixjs7xr wrote

That all happened when time was a thing, but now...

1