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1

SauceMemer t1_ixpc4qt wrote

Replying to Nuada-Argetlam (#662,470)

A waffle restaurant. Generally lower quality, obtained only on road trips where the options are thin. There's a common joke in the southeastern USA: a hurricane is only bad if the Waffle House is closed. Because Waffle Houses NEVER close if they can help it.

22

LadderChemical7937 t1_ixpti3d wrote

Replying to Nuada-Argetlam (#662,470)

It's a restaurant chain across southern USA. FEMA uses a scale called "Waffle House Index" to know how much damage a hurricane has caused to an area.

Waffle House Index has 3 categories, Green(normal), Yellow (limited menu) and Red(closed).

10

NomNomNomNation t1_ixpvt01 wrote

The news said everything would be fine.

Most of my friends were being encouraged to still go into work.

We'd had a much worse hurricane just the month before.

So why, just why, was Waffle House closed?

It must've meant something bad was coming. Something terrible. Waffle House stay open through anything - I've seen those doors wide open in far worse conditions. If there are patrons around, they will sell to them, no questions asked. It's how things have always been.

At that moment, I knew only 2 things:

  1. I had to get out of there.

  2. I needed to get to the bottom of this.

So, I did what any sane person would. I tracked down the manager of my local Waffle House and went straight to his home address.

He lived about a 10-minute drive away, in the next town over. There were still many other cars on the road at this time. All that kept racing through my head was why Waffle House would be closed. The hurricane wasn't for another few hours - If drivers could be out, Waffle House could stay open! In fact, I don't think I had ever seen them closed before this. Do their doors even have locks?

I pulled up at the house. There was already a car in the driveway, so I just pulled up on the sidewalk.

I got out of my car and walked up to the door. I knocked. 3 stern, demanding knocks.

Not a movement inside.

This was definitely the right house. So I knocked again. 3 sterner, even more demanding knocks.

Still nothing.

I walked up to the window and peered in. A chair was knocked over, breakfast was getting cold on the table... I could see the kitchen through an open door at the back of the room - The sink was overflowing with water, and the faucet left on.

I walked slowly back to my car. What could have made everyone leave so fast? And without their car?

I sat down, defeated. I had come for answers, but only collected more questions. To clear my head, I turned the radio on, and what blasted out of the speakers is etched in my mind.

"Breaking News: All 2,100 Waffle Houses have decided to close today."

The only words I could muster up were "My god..."

The first thought I had was, well, wow, that's a lot of locations. Is there really that many? That seems like a lot.

But then my second thought was about how dire this must be. ALL Waffle Houses?? Whatever was going on was not a localised problem - This was national, maybe even global.

That's when I spotted a black car with tinted windows at the end of the road. I decided to follow them, in hopes that I had just caught the family as they left the house.

I saw them disappear around the corner and immediately started driving. No other cars were around at the time, so I knew I had to be discreet, as my presence would be obvious. But when I turned the corner, there the car was. Just stopped in the middle of the road, as if waiting for me.

I slowed down to a stop, and their back left door opened. A man in a suit stepped out - As soon as his face was visible, I recognised him. This was the manager I had been looking for.

I felt my stomach drop a little as he approached the driver's seat window, and waited for me to roll it down. He peered at me through the glass with calculating eyes, as if he already knew me.

I rolled down the window.

He spoke up, "You're wondering how I knew you'd follow me, aren't you Jeremy?"

I probably looked terrified at this point. I felt myself go pale, but tried to keep my composure. "You know my name?"

"I know a lot of things, your name is just one. But you should probably leave, Jeremy. Things aren't safe in most of America."

He began to walk away. But as soon as I opened my mouth to talk, he stopped. Not a sound had left my lips yet, but somehow, without even so much as glancing back at me, he knew I was about to speak.

"Not safe? What do you mean?"

He stood for a moment, as if he was thinking. I'm not entirely sure why, as he seemed to know everything that was going to happen up to this point. But then he spoke without looking at me.

"As a manager of a Waffle House, I'm granted special knowledge every morning. I'm told what will happen throughout my day. Not tomorrow, not next week, every morning I am only informed about the current day."

He turned back at me now, and continued. "I'm told how safe my restaurant will be, how safe my staff will be, and how safe my family will be. I don't know who tells me these things, no manager does. We just know it's always through a phone call, and it's always correct."

I caught my breath, not even realising it had sped up, and replied, "And your family isn't safe today?"

"They are not. And it sounds like no family is."

"What's causing it? What's going to happen?"

He looked a little scared, maybe sad. He had a way of hiding his emotions behind his cold, serious tone.

"I've told you everything I know. I also know that this is the end of this conversation, and that's the last question you ask me today. Goodbye."

He was right. I was speechless, and hardly moved a muscle as he walked back to the car, got in, and was driven off.

I contacted my friends and family and told them we had to go to Europe, right now. I explained everything I could, but they all thought I sounded insane. They mostly told me I wasn't thinking straight.

That's when the news interrupted all broadcasts. All planes were cancelled due to a large solar flare, the largest ever recorded, estimated to hit somewhere in Northern America later that day.

They urged the listeners not to panic, and that it was only precautionary.

But I knew better.

281

Underto_st t1_ixq99lh wrote

“A category one hurricane” the news said.

“No worries, just a small hurricane, right?” I

uttered. Angie, my roommate, paid no attention to

the news. I walked to the kitchen, then opened

the pantry. I wasn't suprised to see a half empty

pantry. Angie loved food. “Hey, let's go get some

take-out” I suggested to her. “Maybe some...

Waffle house?” she replyed. “I mean, that place is

always open! Remember that hurricane last

month? Those doors were wide open!” She joked.

It was true. Waffle house was always open.

“Alright then” I said. I could see Angie's eyes

wide open. We drove to the nearest Waffle House.

Then, laid in my eyes, the most horrific thing

I saw. The closed sign on Waffle House.

Angie panicked. I panicked in my head too. How

was it possible for Waffle House closing on a

category 1..? Angie pointed at an employee

working there. “Hey you! Why is it closed?”

The employee, looking about 20, replied in a

rather chill manner. “You didn't hear? There's a

category 1 hurricane” “But you keep your doors

open all the time!” Complained my roommate

She's hard to shake off. Really hard. “Isn't it

crazy? Well, I'll go now.” said the employee.

We drove back to our apartment. “Well something

bad's gonna happen for sure.” Angie muttered. I

rolled my eyes. “It's 8:30 now, might as well

sleep!” I complained. That girl can be cuckoo.

“Ugh, goodnight.” She said. We laid off to bed. I

woke up in the middle of the night to the

hurricane. It didn't feel like a category 1. It wasn't

a category 1, I just knew it. “Angie! Wake up! Get

in the basement now!” I said in a panicked way.

I was more of a mature person, but not this time.

Just not now. Angie didn't budge. I had no

choice than to carry her to the basement. She

woke up in the rather dirty mattress. She jolted

up. “Why are we in here?” She said. “Doesn't

matter, we're clearly in a bad situation!”

I told her. I peeked through the small window. A

category 5 it looked. “But waffle house would still

be open..” I muttered. But I saw what seems to

be.. An entity. Completely black. Wrecking havoc

in this neighborhood. I almost had a panic attack

when Angie said in a solemn voice. I wasn't sure

if that was even Angie. She said in a deep,

solemn voice.... “We're in Ohio..” I was frozen.

Everything went black.

30

drakken_dude t1_ixqps91 wrote

Replying to AutoModerator (#662,443)

While I know this is a joke about how waffle houses never close except in extreme scenarios, they are actually quite well known for having one of the best disaster recovery teams in the world. They are more often then not one of the quickest organizations to recover from any kind of disaster and really are a great indication of just how bad a scenario is likely to be. If the waffle house closes, GTFO.

11

A-purple-bird t1_ixqxe50 wrote

[Start of recording]

"Hey," my roommate started.

"Yeah?" I replied. "Wait, you're off today?"

"Uh, about that, they're closed." he said, with a scared expression on his face.

You see, my roommate, Pedro, works at Waffle House, which only usually closes in emergancies.

There was a long pause, I think we were both thinking of reasons it would be closed.

Finally, Pedro decided to break the silence.

"Maybe it related to the category 1 hurricane about to make landfall?" he said, in a shakey voice.

"The what now?" I questioned.

"Didn't you get the alert on your phone?"

"No, I turned them off. The sound it makes is scary."

"You child." he said, kind of laughing.

"Excuse me? I am an 19 year old adult."

Then, I realized something.

"Wait, W.H. doesn't close unless its a cat 3 or above!" I exclaimed.

Then, Pedro got a message from his manager. 'Run'.

"Uh," Pedro said, he looked incredibly pale.

"Yeah?"

"My boss just texted me 'Run'." with the most worried expression.

"Oh, its fiiine!" I said. "You live in Florida now! Weather like this is practically the norm!"

"But-"

"Now help me find the damn remote so I can turn on the Weather Channel."

"Uh, okay." he said, but I could tell he wasn't convinced.

Then, Pedro got another text from his manager that read

> This is catastrophic. This "storm" is going to be the worst one the world has ever seen.

After reading the message to me, and nearly having a panic attck, I found the remote and turned to the Weather Channel on the TV.

"Hey, just because your boss said it would be bad, doesn't mean it will." I said, in an attempt to comfort Pedro.

"But everything hes ever said and all the predictions hes ever made were right!" he cried.

Then, the commercial break ended. It revealed massive damage. Its doing more damage than Hurricane Michael, a category 4 that hit 4 years prior, could ever do! Even storm shelters were taking heavy damage. Oh, and the road was flooded 2.4 feet.

Yet, somehow, it was still a cat 1, because of its short windspeed. Wait, now its a tropical depressed?

That is when I knew, its not the hurricane doing it. It was something else.

Something.. big. Something like tha- OH MY GOD WHAT IS THAMGJP7246gja4m-

[End of recording]

20

TheDayOfTheDucks t1_ixrumql wrote

I burst out of the car in a state of panic. I stare in disbelief at the 'Closed' sign hung on the door. I look up at the dark red sky, coughing at the stifling, rancid air. THIS IS NO HURRICANE! Suddenly, there is a noise behind me. I spin around, and am horrified at the sight of a mangled, deformed humanoid with a dozen arms. It lets out an animalistic screech. I run, terrified and utterly confused. The creature lets out another horrific screech, and I begin to run faster, but I stop at the sight of more of these things. I step back, and my foot touches something warm and slightly... sticky? I look back, revealing that what I had stepped in had been the blood of a police officer who had gotten their throat torn out. Though this sight was also extremely horrifying, right now I only had survival on my mind, so I snatched up his gun. It was surprisingly heavy, and I struggled to aim it at the approaching creatures. I fired once, twice, into one of them, but it seemingly had no effect. My arms sore from my first two shots, I lowered the gun and glanced around, at a loss of what to do. I took a step back, over the corpse of the police officer. I heard more cries of animalistic rage and hunger behind me, and knew that I was surrounded. It seemed.. I had no choice. I began to cry as I placed the muzzle of the gun on the roof of my mouth. I looked around at what was left of everything. I squeezed the trigger of the gun.

​

​

^(And everything went black.)

7

NomNomNomNation t1_ixsst6v wrote

Replying to jlg317 (#677,109)

I'm actually from the UK and entirely winged this story using what I found on Wikipedia. I know nothing about them or what food they serve (I assume waffles)

I can confirm that we don't have anything similar over here

7

Bezaid t1_ixsv3bs wrote

Replying to NomNomNomNation (#677,134)

Mostly breakfast foods, but they have other offerings as well (burgers, melts, etc). The most basic of 24-hour Diners, with interior design/decor that looks like it hasn't been updated since the early '90s (at the latest). Absolutely nothing fancy, but you don't go to Waffle House for fancy; you don't go to Waffle House for anything other than basic, edible food.

They're pretty popular in the South, because they're always open, and they always have bacon, eggs, hash browns, and grits.

Waffle House will always have your back.

2

HurricaneWind9 t1_ixtllaj wrote

When I'd moved to Florida, I'd known that the state was prone to hurricanes.

One day I had the radio turned on, reading a book while my cat, Chappy, cuddled up on the couch seat next to me. Even though I was half listening, I could still make out the words,

"Tropical Storm Tobias is not expected to make significant impact in Tampa Bay, becoming a Category one at it's worst."

Sighing, I pull my laptop onto me, logging in to view more about the storm. Every source said the same thing. May strengthen into a category one, if even. Should only be a category one. Minimal preparations needed. Chappy begins to Meow at me, wanting food. I go into the kitchen to get his food, realizing we're out. Slightly annoyed I have to make the journey out to Walmart right before a storm, despite it's small size. I say goodbye to Chappy, driving out into the town. On the way I pass the Waffle House, noticing something that almost made me stop driving in my tracks.

The Waffle House was closed.

On the rest of the drive to the store, I worry a lot. It's a small storm, why of all places is the waffle house closed? Everything else is open, except the Chick-fil-a, because it was a Sunday. I Quickly buy the food and stop in the Waffle House parking lot, Checking inside. Looking in the window, I notice the manager hurrying inside a room, quickly shutting the door behind him. I call my friend, Akira, who lives up north in the Lutz area.
"Dude, we're in trouble."
"What?" He answers, confused. Is he cooking? I hear boiling water in the background.
"The Waffle House is closed!" I yell, opening the car door, "I went to Walmart to get cat food and I saw the closed sign on the way!"
"No way, you're insane." He says in disbelief, " 'S only supposed to be a category one."
"Check your local one, bet they're closed too."
It takes a minute as he asks the Alexa in the back if his local location is open. "The Waffle House on (___) is currently closed, but it's 12-"
"No way. We gotta go now. All them are closed." He says, continuing to make whatever he was making.
"Meet at my house, we have to get out of here."

Akira hangs up. I get home and open the door, quickly feeding the cat.

4 hours later, me and Akira are flying down I-75, trying to get out of the state. Chappy isn't bothered, shut in his crate with a blanket on the floor in front of the seat, originally on the crate. I notice the sky ahead of me turning a deep green color, not even something seen during a Tornado. A screech, louder then any howling winds, Akira shouts for me too drive faster, but I can't. Then suddenly we speed past a sign.

Welcome to Ohio.

That doesn't make sense. We were just going past Ocala and Gainesville a minute ago. Suddenly the car runs out of gas, causing us to slowly come to a stop. Two planes howl down the road behind us. Spirit and Ryan Air. We're so done for. The sky suddenly turns a Deep, Blood Red. I flee into the woods, holding my cat. As an unkown creature approaches, I think to myself.

No wonder Waffle House was closed...

4