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MinFootspace t1_j1n8cqp wrote

It's Christmas eve, the whole family is in the living room. Suddenly, noise is heard in the chimney, and a minute later, a slightly confused Easter Bunny hops out of the fireplace.


russrussrussrussruss OP t1_j1nesh9 wrote

‘Twas the night before Christmas, when all through the house, not a creature was stirring, not even a mouse.

Because we were fucking petrified by the commotion coming from our chimney. Me and Sicilia shared subdued glances at each other, not making our fear obvious to the kids.

They were ecstatic, Bobby and tommy were still at the age where Santa was very real, and this was a dream come true for them. “Hey, get the boys to bed. santa wouldn’t like it if he say them up this late.” I hinted to Sicilia, and she rushed them off to the relative safety of their bedroom. I stood from my chair, took a step back, and silently shat myself as I waited for whoever this was to come out.

I really didn’t expect pink fur. Or an Easter basket.

What stood before me was a 6 foot tall human-rabbit combination. A “regular” body covered in pink fur, with the head of a rabbit. It was holding a basket full of colour eggs. “Alright, time to hide these bad b-AUGHHH!”

We simultaneously jumped and recoiled back. The thing hit the chimney, and spilled its basket. “Wh…what the hell are you?” I was no longer silently shitting myself, I’d imagine it was quite noticeable. “Isn’t it obvious? What are you doing awake? Aren’t you all usually asleep by…” it trailed off as it took in the room. “Hey…why do you have…is that a tree?…oh boy, this isn’t good.”

I couldn’t react. I couldn’t speak. I was more confused than scared now.

“Uhh, my bad? Look, I’m just gonna…” it ducked as it entered the chimney, leaving its dropped eggs where they landed. “If anyone…well, they won’t. But if anyone comes…have my back?” It put on an awkward smile, which was quite disturbing on a rabbits face. “S-sure…no problem?”

“Thanks, and hey, Merry Christmas…hehe…no? Alright. See you in April” and with that, it scurried back up my chimney. Once the noises and grunts stopped, I sat back down.

“April…that was the fucking Easter bunny? Jesus…”

As I contemplated the last 2 minutes, I heard more commotion from the chimney. I didn’t move this time, I figured it was coming back to collect its eggs. Then, I saw a red suit with snow white lining slowly descend…


MinFootspace t1_j1njdqv wrote

I can imagine santa having to climb back up because he can't cross the rabbit :)) Must be an awkward moment for both of them.


russrussrussrussruss OP t1_j1nk9g4 wrote

E.B patted soot of its fur, when sleigh bells and the crunching of snow came from behind it.


sigh not again, man”

E.B spun on its pink heels

“Hey khris”

“Dude, you’ve gotta stop”

“Well, I’m not doing it on purpose”

“That doesn’t matter, this is my show. I mean, what if someone sees you? You don’t think that’ll cause more than a little existential dread?”