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NewRomanian t1_j1tqpe2 wrote

The lion, the witch, and the AUDACITY of this bitch


Thainexylon OP t1_j1xf1nl wrote

The world of Carcio will meet the most insolent, most entitled and THE MOST OUTRAGEOUSLY AUDACIOUS blonde >!beech!< that is Karen.

We will join in on Karen's journey of entitlement as she will constantly harass the witch, annoy the living life out of the locals, and will DEFINITELY mess with the lion.

Will she change? Will she die? I hope so... I mean, I hope she dies real soon, because this unforgivable mistake does not deserve to have this kind of power.

Price: An outrageous amount of $54, but someone complained it's too much.


"This is definitely entertaining. Also, **** Karen." - Bob

"This is disrespectful, I would like to see the author." - Karen

"STFU Karen, this is a work of art." - Emily, Karen's neighbor.

"I want food." - The lion in Carcio.


jardanovic t1_j1tdnjj wrote

I Don't Hate You


Thainexylon OP t1_j1tixkx wrote

A collection of short stories about the pains, struggles and other hurdles in a relationship, whether that'll be platonic or intimate. How does one deal with the other's flaws?

Stories include:

  • You and I
  • Missing You
  • Siblings
  • Rivals' Reunion
  • Amelia
  • It's Just Him...
  • What Happened to Perfect?
  • And many more...

These stories were written by writers who once experienced being in a relationship and a few therapists who helped us in fact-checking these works.

Price: $20

(Note: Also, good to see you again u/jardanovic!)


Eberid t1_j1tb83m wrote

The Day God Farted


Thainexylon OP t1_j1tbzyk wrote

It was a nice day until a big yellow-green fog filled the city of Aldean after a thunderous noise of farting echoed throughout the land... The fog was sweet at first, then it started to become the equivalent of mustard gas.

There are no protagonists, no antagonists, just a God and His daily deity shenanigans.

The Day that God Farted is a collection of short stories about deities doing their ridiculous acts against the mortal world. We even got Loki and Zeus as you would expect.

Price: $70 $69.42


021Fireball t1_j1tdnja wrote



Thainexylon OP t1_j1tf27i wrote

A humanoid creature was spotted near Green Thorne County, looked humanoid and according to locals, they're known as the Blight. These humanoid species have the ability to suck the light and the life out of anyone that gets near them.

They are now growing hungry as multiple reports of these attacks appear left and right after the discovery. That's when the Blightbinders came to help, keeping the town safe out of these hungry Blights.

And you, this is your first time dealing with such threat like this, hope you don't get sucked, okay?

Blightbinder is a tale of a team that deals with the Blights and a starting Blightbinder who realizes how hard it is to deal with them— as well as holding a freaking blaster properly.

Price: $10


thoughtsthoughtof t1_j1tlley wrote

Bitterblue in Winterskeep


Thainexylon OP t1_j1tmwdb wrote

A tale of a human who just happened to land into the realm of monsters— not the grisly and hostile kind, mind you— and landed into a place called Winterskeep. Join them in a tale of friendship, wholesomeness and... Pies, lots of dessert.

Price: $15.48

Note: There are two sticky notes on the book that are basically reviews. Both are anonymous.

This is basically Undertale, but without the genocide and that memelord skeleton.

It does remind me a lot about Undertale... I agree with the first review here.


Apprehensive_Age3663 t1_j1ufq4h wrote

The Dancer’s Plight


Thainexylon OP t1_j23qq99 wrote

River, a ballerina got into a nasty accident that caused her legs to break, leaving her for a long period of time to not be able to dance ballet... again as she struggles to do so. Even if she does recover, she won't be able to do it again. The damage was done, and Alex was devastated.

And then she met Alex, a dancer and a friend that she hadn't seen since high school. After recovery, Alex showed River about her career as a dancer... Could this be a new way for River to dance again? Or will she find something else that she'll truly admire?

Price: $10

The reviews about this book are quite mixed...


Mirabolis t1_j1v1qfw wrote

“The Unfortunate Incident of the Ballistic Cantaloupe”

<made up title>


Thainexylon OP t1_j2dkdrk wrote

A small collection of questionably and weirdly fictional unfortunate events, yet with moral lessons...

Such stories include:

  • Drowned in Alcohol
  • Burnout Fallout
  • Distracted Disaster
  • Cancellation
  • What COULDN'T Possibly Go Wrong? #1
  • Armada's Mess
  • Shot You Back
  • Stuck in a Washing Machine
  • Stuck in a Jar of Jam
  • Motorcycle Joyride: A Tragedy
  • Bull ++++ Overload
  • More to Come...

Price: ₱359.99


The_TransGinger t1_j1tg6jd wrote

Under the Canyon Moon.


Thainexylon OP t1_j1tjvkx wrote

"Here is where we always meet, this was the last time we ever met... It's been so long, where are you now?"

Delilah used to meet up with a mysterious, childish boy who used to hang out by the cliff under a tree. One day, the boy wasn't there, he was nowhere to be seen... The day after that, he never came... Recollecting back to past conversations with the boy, Delilah tries to figure out where he went and what happened to him.

Price: ₱199


justananotherman t1_j1tjh92 wrote

Wanderer's tales


Thainexylon OP t1_j1tlvdu wrote

Note: This is just a green leather journal, so there was nothing on the back, obviously. The front page does have something to say...

No matter where I meander, I see something interesting wherever I go, whether that would be the blissful meadows, the rocky road, the valleys or the peaks; there is always something interesting that entices the eye.

Each of these entries are tales, tales of which I recount every encounter with my curiosities. And every curiosity I see is my own discovery about the world around me, and myself.

Henry S.

Price: There's no price indicated, it's just a green leather journal that you just found laying on one of the tables in the library.


Kitty_Fuchs t1_j1tlwr0 wrote

The exciting life of Arnold the Amoeba.


Thainexylon OP t1_j1uaa33 wrote

Join Arnold as we explore his habitat, his lifestyles and how amoeba functions in an ecosystem. We will even tackle the tale of Merc the Brain-Eating Amoeba of Kerosene Creek. So, grab your microscopes and let's dive into the world of Arnold the Amoeba!

A must-read for kids interested in Biology!

Price: $13.49


HelloWorld1352 t1_j1tm9j5 wrote

Everyone’s Laughing At You


Thainexylon OP t1_j1u9f5u wrote

Yes, they are. They're definitely laughing at you.

You may or may not hear it, but someone is always talking behind your back, saying mean things about you.

If you feel insecure about this, do not fear... This book is for you. In this book, you'll learn how to take insults and never give in or even falter, you'll learn how to DEAL WITH IT.

Everyone may be laughing at you, but you will have the last laugh after this.

PRICE: $50

(Also, we have met again u/HelloWorld1352)


HelloWorld1352 t1_j1ua6lu wrote

I am so dumb. I somehow didn’t notice again.


Thainexylon OP t1_j1uck0n wrote

Don't feel bad, no one usually notices the username of the person who posts the post.


Evening_Accountant33 t1_j1tmjqs wrote

My Life As An OP Background Character.


Thainexylon OP t1_j1umu2c wrote

Hi, my name is Kyle.

Despite being a background character, I'm always somewhere, anywhere, and everywhere. Just like >!Tom Scott!< himself.

Bank robbery, I'm there. Beaches? Absolutely. Space invasion? Definitely there. In the park, you name it!

Wherever the setting is, wherever and whenever the main character is there, I am always there, no matter what.

I also know a few secrets about this world, so... I do have some value to provide, come with me!

Price: $23.32


umbra_pseudonym t1_j1tohfa wrote

The birth of Sadness was the birth of Joy


Thainexylon OP t1_j1x4rb1 wrote

The Birth of Sadness was the Birth of Joy tells the story of two different people born on the same date.

One is optimistic, the other is cynical.

One is satisfied, the other wants for more.

One is in Florida, the other is in Ohio.

One is warm, the other is cold.

One is joyful, the other is melancholic.

Opposites indeed, but as they meet, they will learn that they are the two sides of the same coin...

Price: $3.59


spindizzy_wizard t1_j1tpj9a wrote

Space Raiders of the Lost Extraterrestrial Shark


Thainexylon OP t1_j1xe24e wrote

No, that is not a typo, this is a completely different book of its own.

The Extraterrestrial Shark is a famous myth of the cosmos where a shark that's more humongous than any other shark and way more weird than any other shark.

The Space Raiders have been looking for this one for quite a while when they received a call from the captain to come back to Earth, for there were multiple reports of missing swimmers, half eaten docks, and weird noises coming from the deep.

It seems that the shark they're looking for is now on their planet, will they be able to save the day?

Price: £10


of_kilter t1_j1tq61q wrote

“Im thinking of ending things”


Thainexylon OP t1_j1z76tb wrote

Emily has a lot of things that she never finished, a lot of unfinished business. For instance, a story she never got to work on, her debts, her relationship with her ex and so much more...

But when she was struck with a sort of sickness, she was also thinking that maybe... It's time to finish things before her life finishes first.

Price: $4.84


28th_Stab_Wound t1_j1tu8bo wrote

'What Colour Does a Kobold Bleed?'


Thainexylon OP t1_j2cpvuu wrote

Sevyr is not quite the nicest around here, but you can't blame him for being that way since he's a Kobold, a dragon-man to paint the picture clearly.

The city of Avorsé, which is where he lives, shuns out his kind due to unexplainable reasons. But if there's one thing about the city of Avorsé aside from being racist against Kobolds, is that it's running rampant with filthy corruption... And Sevyr is looking for a reasonable excuse and an understandable reason to cause some chaos...

Price: 100 dabloons


Tryctophobia t1_j1tz1wj wrote

Dark, Darker, yet Darker


Thainexylon OP t1_j1yaraw wrote

>!Dan Solace!< is a stunning, successful, sexy, sadistic man... Yes, he is sadistic for he lusts the blood of the victims he strikes— mostly, those were people who have done something bad— for he is a business man by day, serial killer by night. With over 47 identified victims, and possibly more than that, he is quite prolific with his sprees.

This book contains every atrocities he committed against his victims each having their own story, most are gruesome to the point that there's not a single speck of mercy left. It also goes to show what cruel artistry this man has, to convey the meaning behind every scene.

Price: $57.50

There's a sticky note on the book, it says:

. ...- . .-. -.-- / ...- .. -.-. - .. -- / .. ... / .-- --- .-. - .... / .- / -.. --- .-.. .-.. .- .-.


Xero818 t1_j2dfllt wrote

i don't wanna know what "half a victim" is


Thainexylon OP t1_j2dfrsq wrote

You mean like, 50 cents?


Xero818 t1_j2dk3qt wrote

every victim is a dollar, after all


Thainexylon OP t1_j2dkixi wrote


Also, I already responded to your other two titles, check them out.


Xero818 t1_j2do1pc wrote

other two? i only posted one other one (and yes, i did check it out, it's very cool)


Thainexylon OP t1_j2dotjh wrote

Oh wait, yeah. There are two there.

The cult and the looking-for-a-new-god one... I might have mixed up this story too, thinking that you made this.


Xero818 t1_j2fj2bs wrote

no, i didn't make this one. i did make the cult and death of god ones though.


MinFootspace t1_j1u5ib8 wrote

The Blue Door


Thainexylon OP t1_j2dizn5 wrote

What's behind the blue door?

Samantha wondered.

Could it be the TARDIS? Don't be ridiculous, it's a door in a wall.

Who's behind it? A person, probably.

To be clear, she's never seen this blue door before that lays among the red doors... Did she ever consider that it may have been a defect? No... Also, she barely goes out.

We'll be joining Samantha figuring out what's behind the door, and see how far the writers will stretch this story until it doesn't make any sense.

Price: $89.76


thoughtsthoughtof t1_j2dzy1z wrote

Every night before she slept she has seen a blue door. Lately the callings have been getting louder, more determined to draw her in. Join her as she meets Riley Decker and Eile Reyes: the Phineas and Ferb of Baněm, Cirilith the Elsa of Bathebam, and Domitrix the giant of Beantopia.


EvilNoobHacker t1_j1u6ujo wrote

What The Hell Did I Just Read


Thainexylon OP t1_j1z3sz1 wrote

A collection of HIGHLY QUESTIONABLE short stories.

If you want something truly out-of-this-world, this book has you covered. With over 100+ weird stories to digest, you will definitely lay on your bed, wondering why you bought this damned book after every read.

So strap on! We got stories like:

  • Roomba Attack
  • Random Defenestration
  • President Oak Tree
  • Toilet's PoV
  • Some Crackhead's Fanfic
  • All For Tuna
  • Goose Chase

Price: ₱199.99


EvilNoobHacker t1_j1z4824 wrote

I wanted to see what you came up with, since I recently did a paper on the requirement to start renaming the cosmic horror genre, and What The Hell Did I Just Read was one of my examples of why we needed to redefine the genre.


Thainexylon OP t1_j1z4ffb wrote

Wait, what do you mean by that?


EvilNoobHacker t1_j1z4xcm wrote

The genre of cosmic horror has can easily be split into Lovecraftian Horror- horror that is inspired by the works of H.P. Lovecraft- and Modern Cosmic Horror- horror that is much more existential than it’s compatriot. One of the first papers I wrote in college was an argument of why we needed to officially recognize the growing split in subgenre between the two, and why recognizing the difference between the two would more accurately give readers an expectation of what they were in for.

I wanted to see what you did with the title, since I’ve already thoroughly analyzed the actual book that was written with it.


Thainexylon OP t1_j1z5e7r wrote

Quite interesting with the paper...

On the other hand... I am basically making up summaries for random book titles (i.e ones that don't exist.)

I'm sorry if it's not what you expected...


EvilNoobHacker t1_j1z5td7 wrote

Oh no, I wanted to see the difference between them. I’m happy that it was different! Heck, I’m a writer myself, and “Goose Chase” as a name and concept alone for a short story gives me something that I can’t wait to write and share with my family and friends.



Thainexylon OP t1_j2dj9x4 wrote

Also, if you ever made a short story for Goose Chase, let me know!


Astro_Venatas t1_j1ugd3h wrote

Florida man invents time travel, goes back in time, convinces everyone that he’s god, becomes king of early united states.


Thainexylon OP t1_j1uo5hc wrote

Condense that into "Florida Man" and well... You got a book title.

Jerry is just a guy who lives in Florida, seems ordinary at first. But the fact that he's in Florida is definitely a sign to look out for.

He may be average, but he isn't your average man... He is your out-of-the-average Florida Man that you'll definitely hear on the news who committed crazier stuff than Trevor Phillips.

He built a time machine, convinced everyone he's a god, crowned as King of the US of A, and squared up with Ohio Man at one point in a chessboxing match.

This book is all of his tales, the legend of... Florida Man.

Price: $69


Xero818 t1_j1uxbsp wrote

Since The Death of God, There's Been A Vacancy Open


Thainexylon OP t1_j23svmx wrote


After the death of God, Shīkā (Seeker) and Tesuto (Test) are looking for the perfect person that could fill the role of God. Join them through a journey of trial and error, test and tribulations, chaos and dismay, as they're looking for the next God. Will they succeed?

Now available: Chapter 9.25 - Nine to Five

Price: An arm and a leg ¥1200

(Note: I used Google Translate for this.)


TMinusBOOM t1_j1v5u6l wrote

My Last Day On Earth


Thainexylon OP t1_j1xgic8 wrote

A collection of short stories of individuals who have spent their final days on Earth. The end will come to us at one point, so how will you face your own end when you know how much you have left? Join us as we tell you the stories of these people who accepted their fate and are living the most out of their last days.

Price: ₱249


ur-socks-sir t1_j1vpbsu wrote

The price of a peppermint.


Thainexylon OP t1_j2dofal wrote

A children's book about supermarkets, production, marketing tactics, minimum wage, processed products, capitalism and more.

A must-read for kids to be aware of capitalism!

Price: $7.49

(Note: Despite countless attempts to ban this book, the book always comes back like William Afton, along with the power of angry people...)


YZGRDYN t1_j1x7d3g wrote

Becoming Part of the Dragon's Hoard


Thainexylon OP t1_j1xd1xi wrote

This is a collection of tales behind every valuable treasure the Dragon of Schmagenys has hoarded. From the Dictator's "Divine Invictus" Spear, to the Chalice of the Gods, to the Book of Soul Farming, every legendary treasure is there.

Price: ₱250


Xero818 t1_j2dfonv wrote

Don't You Want To Become A Cult Leader?


Thainexylon OP t1_j2dhgpk wrote

Come on, you would feel MORE powerful and respected than before... Don't you want that?

Through thorough searching and observations with well-known cults that existed today, as well as looking back at cults of the past, setting up a cult of our own... We brought it forward to you, the book that was made from the blood, sweat and tears of our laborious research on how to set up a cult... as well as being aware with other cults and their tactics!

With this book, you'll be able to discern cultic tactics and even set up your own cult!

Tried and tested!

Price $100

(Note: This is not available in your country, for it has been banned due to a huge incident called "The Flock of the Sheep" that caused >!a mass suicide of 549 members including its' leader!<. We advise you to be wary of this book... You've been warned.)


Thainexylon OP t1_j2dhvij wrote

OP Note: On second thought, the note could've also explained that the book was a scam and was pulled off from the shelves. The copies that have been retrieved were now repurposed either as journals, scratch or firewood.


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Thainexylon OP t1_j1z5k2d wrote

Just to be clear, I'm making up summaries for random book titles that don't exist.


plasma_ex_nova t1_j1uaz8g wrote

Project Kontingency: The Golden Galaxy


CurdPigeon t1_j1ub6v1 wrote

Harry Porter and His Chamber of Secrets


Jacketworld t1_j1udq5d wrote

Rudu and Tilios batshit adventures - WTF is going on


Mighty-Osip t1_j1uev0d wrote

The gospel of the New Testament opossum god.


peace_off t1_j1uk3r4 wrote

Who can save the Hero?


ForceIll4565 t1_j1uyc1t wrote

Cannibal Women from the Avocado Jungle of Death.


LeadGem354 t1_j1v6a2t wrote

The Days Between Tropics


PN_Guin t1_j1v72i6 wrote

"On the origin of planets"


Lowwkey_annoying t1_j1vngdc wrote

Legends of Athrea Generation 3

(title of my own book)


eway44 t1_j1w6hn9 wrote

Good reason to have them


Cupcake_Prime t1_j1wmq03 wrote

Ripping Open the Wound and Letting the River Run Red


ElderStomper t1_j1wpqul wrote

She Left Without Hope


thoughtsthoughtof t1_j2e1hbz wrote

After an anonymous call, Freya Coleb is finally free of her abusive husband. But now she has no one. She looks upon her situation and wonders why free a caged bird only to leave it with nothing?


"A mother should love her child more than her life."

Ellia has always loved her daughter Hope so much. But the threats, the hitting it was all too much. And no one believed her. She had to leave. He wouldn't let her take her.

She got what she wanted, she thinks. She should be happy. But she's not. All she feels is guilt, and it's overriding her will to live (or as an actual summary of the book rather than blurb on the back to get read either it does/something stops her.)


GoofWisdom t1_j1xmhwp wrote

The Messiah showed up - Not what you expected