2/2

"Fine!", he said, annoyance obvious in his voice. "But you're gonna have to take the next weekend shift out of order to make up for this."

"Thanks, Jerry.", I said, relief washing over me like a cold shower as I hung up. I hated doing the weekend shifts, but if that got me out of working today, then that would be worth in. I headed over to my laptop and opened up a browser to do some research. Placing the arrow on the desk beside my keyboard, I opened up Google, and started searching for photos of arrows. A half an hour later, having not found a match, I sat back, and checked my email. And that's when I saw it.

The Valentine's Day ad showed a cherub wielding a bow, with an arrow nocked - an arrow that looked remarkably like the one glowing and shimmering on my desk.

"I will be dipped in shit!", I said. It was February. It was almost Valentine's Day. I picked up the arrow again, and felt that warmth in my chest. Even out of the cold, I could feel it spreading throughout my body. If this was truly Cupid's Arrow, then I didn't have to be alone any more. I could use this to find someone, and I wouldn't have to go through life lonely and sad and pathetic, like my father always feared I would. I could find someone and use this and they'd love me and stay with me forever. I felt a surge of hope and another of joy - but only for a moment.

"But - what about her? What about what SHE wants?", I thought. One of the things that she'd said to me when she dumped me was that I never thought about HER, and what SHE wanted. I just presumed. And, over the last months, in between nights filled with rage, booze and tears, I realized that she'd been right. I had presumed that what I wanted, she wanted. Wouldn't the use of Cupid's Arrow be exactly the same thing? Wouldn't using it be yet another example of me being the selfish, callous, entitled bastard that she'd accused me of being? Was there ANY way that I could use this that wouldn't be selfish?

Returning to the search engine, I did some reading on how this arrow was supposed to work. There was a lot of contradiction between the various sources, but there was one thread of knowledge that sort of felt right to me. Apparently, once struck by the arrow, the person would fall in love with the first person that they saw. There was nothing about the arrow having to be fired from a particular bow to work. Nor was there particular mention that it even HAD to be fired from a bow. I could, if I wanted, just walk up to someone, and poke them with it, and they'd fall in love with the next person they saw. I thought about the implications of that and realized that it would be pretty horrific. In "Midsummer Night's Dream", Shakespeare showed how dangerous it was to play around with things like this. Even back in the sixteenth century, he showed how wrong it would be. It'd be taking away their choice, and wouldn't be any different than using roofies on someone and that was really ugly. So that was obviously out.

Similarly, I couldn't use it on my ex- - sure, she'd fall back in love with me, but it would be wrong on all levels. I felt the ache to have things go back to hwo they used to be, but I knew that it would be completley wrong. I thought about it for a while, poking at the heartache like a man pokes at a missing tooth, the temptation thrumming in my belly. But - she wouldn't have a choice - and that would only make me exactly what she accused me of. I remembered the anger and shame I'd felt when she'd lashed out at me before we brokeup and discarded the idea, feeling guilty for even considering it. The past was the past, and things were different now - neither of us were the same people that had fallen in love with each other, all those years ago. It was past time to focus on the future instead of worrying about what I'd lost in the past.

Then I thought about the couples I knew. But what about if they were already married? I thought about my friends, Jan and Harold. I'd known Harold for decades, and had been the best man at his wedding. A few weeks back, we'd gotten drunk and he'd confessed that he wasn't sure that he loved Jan any more. The relationship had gotten stale, and predictable, and he was starting to feel like he was just wasting his time staying. Jan still seemed to be in love with him, though. What if I jabbed him with the arrow. Would it be ethical to use the arrow to rekindle the love that Harold used to have for her? It would be easy enough to see them both at the same time. Jan liked him as much as Harold did, and she'd been really sympathetic to him since his marriage had ended. Quickly, I discarded that idea too - it wouldn't be any different than using the arrow on my ex-.

And then, inspiration hit. In a flash, I knew what I could do. It would be ethical. It wouldn't hurt anyone else. And it would actually help things. Standing up from the desk, I picked up the arrow, and walked into the other room, turning on the overhead light. It flickered two or three times, before it stayed on. I thought about this, running it through my mind over and over again. And then, I looked down, took the arrow in my right hand, and thrust it into my chest. I felt something akin to an electric shock run through me, and my heart started beating wildly. And I knew that I was right. I was going to fall in love with the next person that I saw. It was going to happen, and it would be real, and it would change my life forever.

I raised my head, and looked at the person across from me. I saw their face, filled with hope and wonder. I was their hair, thinning, but still there. And I felt nothing but love for the person I was looking at. The bathroom mirror wasn't huge, but it was big enough that I had a good look at myself. And this time, I knew that I was going to do everything I could to make the man I saw feel safe, supported, happy, and above all, loved. As the shock faded, I could feel tears springing to my eyes.

"It's going to be different now.", I told myself. And this time, I felt nothing but love and security when I saw myself saying it. "It's all going to be different."

Edit: to fix a name