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Chaos-in-a-CookieJar t1_j2csv35 wrote

-sorry i can’t

-?

-i can’t send a pic

-why? r u ugly?

-yea

-that’s ok so am i

-it’s not like that, you’d hate me if you saw me

-no i wouldn’t, I could never hate you ash

-you say that now, but i know ur wrong

-how do you know?

-all human hate me

-humans?

-ash r u there?

-r u ok?

-please answer me

-ash?

[Ashfallen97 has left the chat]

I closed the chat and stepped away from the computer. After a long, deep sigh, all I could do was shake my head. I tried to go to sleep, but I couldn’t get Ash out of my head. He was always a nice dude online, a little weird but never creepy or anything. The only thing I would consider a red flag, was that his sense of humor was super self-deprecating. He always cracked jokes at his own expense, always saying that he deserved to die, or that he should have never been born. I never really thought about it that much. I mean, lots of people make dark jokes online. Hell, even I do from time to time. I felt a sense of doom settle over me as one single thought filled my mind. Had Ash taken his own life? I had no way of knowing for sure, and for weeks, the notion kept me from sleep for a few days.

I hated to admit it, but Ash was the closest thing I had to a friend at the time. I was going through a rough patch at school, the typical loner kid I guess. I fit all the stereotypes. I was that one messy haired, wrinkle clothed, straight C student who never spoke more than a few words strung together. Group projects were the bane of my existence, and just getting myself out of bed in the morning was a struggle. My saving grace was the fact that my folks were always out of town; either for their respective jobs, or together on vacations and cruises as a couple. In other words, there was no one around to tell me what to do.

‘What did I do with all that freedom?’ I hear you ask? Mostly, I played COD and messed around in different discord servers, which is where I met Ash. I felt like he understood me better than anyone; better than my teachers, better than my classmates, better even than my own parents. He and I clicked on so many levels, it was like magic. And then he was gone, just gone. His account remained inactive for six months.

It wasn’t until late March that I suddenly received a DM from Ash. I was ecstatic that my friend had finally come back.

-heya ray

-hey ash where u been?

-nowhere really

-so why did u disappear?

-accidentally said human, panicked I guess

-so what did u mean by human?

-i’m not human

-u serious?

-yea

-so why did u come back?

-i need a favor, u were the only one i could think to ask

-what’s the favor?

-i need a place to stay

-u serious?

-yea it’s fine if u say no, just thought i’d ask

-why do you need a place?

-got outed, being hunted

-u serious?

-yea

-aight what’s ur area?

-michigan

-what city?

-doesn’t matter i’ll go wherever

-aight i got a place in detroit I’ll meet you at the henry ford museum in a week

-u mean it?

-yea

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Chaos-in-a-CookieJar t1_j2fdh5i wrote

I knew I shouldn’t have been there. It was stupid to meet up with someone I met online, but I said I would be there, and I was. As I stood there outside the Henry Ford Museum, freezing in my coat and wishing I wore my parka, I wondered if I had been duped. Would Ash even show up? I flinched at every sound or shift in the shadows, nervous that it was all some ploy, that I would be killed or kidnapped, maybe even trafficked if I was particularly unlucky.

Suddenly, a figure walked awkwardly out into the light of the street lamp. My heart nearly leapt out of my chest, he was wearing a hoodie with a distinctive rose pattern. That was our code that’s we agreed on; that he would be wearing his rose hoodie, and that I would be wearing my blue coat with lightning bolts on it. He looked around for a moment before he spotted me and hesitantly came over. “Ash?” I asked, his response would determine what would happen next. “Ray” We both smiled, though I could barely see his face under his hood. Without another word, I led him back to my apartment.

When we got back to the apartment, Ash nervously asked, “So, you’re still in school right? Not to look a gift horse in the mouth, but won’t your parents be mad that you brought a random person back to their apartment?” I shrugged, responding with, “See, my folks decided a while ago that, since they were always gone, I didn’t need a whole house to myself. They sold our family home, and got us this little two bedroom apartment. They won’t be home for a couple months, so you can take their bedroom.” To that, he cracked another grin, “I can’t believe you actually agreed to this… thank you so much, I mean it. What could I ever do to repay you…?” I didn’t quite know what to say to that, I wasn’t really ready to have an emotional conversation, so I decided to sidestep it entirely, “You can start by helping me pick out a movie for us to watch, I’ll get the popcorn going.”

I kept my eye on him as I made my way over ti the kitchen. He slipped off his boots, revealing frankly monstrous… claws? I didn’t even know what I would call them, somewhere between paws and claws. He pulled off his hoodie, and then I could see why he didn’t want to send me a picture of himself. His skin was a pale, ashen, almost translucent white. His ears where huge and pointed, with tufts of fur on the end almost like a lynx. But the most shocking facet of his appearance, was his tale. Long and thin, it as well ended in a tuft of fur. He was… adorable. Strange looking, and definitely not human, but absolutely adorable.

Once the popcorn was out of the microwave, we sat down on the couch and began the process of selecting a movie to watch. We eventually did pick something to watch, and we settled in. I only had one fluffy blanket, so what ended up happening is that we got closer and closer to each other. I couldn’t believe it, a cute guy was actually close to me! I never had any luck with the guys at school, they all thought I was a weirdo, but maybe this could work out. Or maybe not, either way, I resolved to be there for my friend. For the rest of the night, I couldn’t focus on the movie because all I could think about was Ash.

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MotionBlerd t1_j2cxcho wrote

Kevin shivered, half from the gust of winter wind that sneaked an icy tendril through the gap under the door, half from nervousness. Should he tell her?

You're such an idiot, he thought, you've fallen for a girl you've never even seen - she's probably a 34-year-old guy from Sandusky. He sighed. This was silly - forming a schoolboy crush on someone whose primary interactions with him had been complaining about the weather, talking about how to write a kernel module, and repeatedly murdering each other with rockets in Quake. And yet here he sat, desperately longing for the companionship of someone who was little more than a grouping of pixels.

He opened the instant-messaging application and scrolled to PixieStickChick81.


x_RurouniKenshinFan_x: yt?

PixieStickChick81: yes

PixieStickChick81: one sec

PixieStickChick81 is typing...

PixieStickChick81: back. sup?

x_RurouniKenshinFan_x: do u have a boyfreind

PixieStickChick81: i do not; why?

Kevin felt a quivering in his belly. It was now or never.

x_RurouniKenshinFan_x: please don't be mad

x_RurouniKenshinFan_x: i like you

PixieStickChick81 is typing...

PixieStickChick81: and i like you

x_RurouniKenshinFan_x: not as friends

x_RurouniKenshinFan_x: smth more

PixieStickChick81 is typing...

A wave of panic, cold and electrifying, coursed through him. She's gonna say no, he thought. I'm gonna get friend-zoned, and we'll never talk again. He could feel tears welling up.

PixieStickChick81: i know. i like you back in that way...

What?! he thought. Even though he'd daydreamed of holding her hand, sailing around the world with her, even thought of doing that with her, he'd never have expected to read those words, not in a million years.

He re-read the cherished words and blinked.

The tears came, unbidden, but, rather than the sorrow of the unrequited, they came from relief, hope, a kind of happiness he'd never have guessed existed.

PixieStickChick81 is typing...

PixieStickChick81: but

Uh-oh.

PixieStickChick81: i don't know if it would work out

His heart sank.

PixieStickChick81: i don't think my parents will let me have a boyfriend yet

PixieStickChick81: and i'm...

PixieStickChick81: different

x_RurouniKenshinFan_x: different like how

x_RurouniKenshinFan_x: r u trans

x_RurouniKenshinFan_x: even if so, i still think wed be happy together

PixieStickChick81: it's not that

x_RurouniKenshinFan_x: race?

PixieStickChick81: no

PixieStickChick81: i don't think my parents would care about that at all, actually

PixieStickChick81: it's just that...well, i'm not the girl i think you think i am

PixieStickChick81: can we talk about it in quake?

PixieStickChick81: 35.185.44.174:27500

Kevin sighed. He double-clicked on the brown Q logo and waited while the game loaded.


PixieStixieNixie has entered the game.

R?WeNotMen has entered the game.

Loading maps/e3m5.bsp - The Wind Tunnels

PixieStixieNixie eats R?WeNotMen's pineapple

PixieStixieNixie: dammit lol

PixieStixieNixie: so look

R?WeNotMen tries to put the pin back in

PixieStixieNixie: i didn't mean to hurt your feelings

R?WeNotMen: u didnt

R?WeNotMen: no means no

R?WeNotMen: i respect ur decision

PixieStixieNixie: that's just it

R?WeNotMen rides PixieStixieNixie's rocket

PixieStixieNixie: i like you

PixieStixieNixie: i love you

PixieStixieNixie: i truly mean that

PixieStixieNixie: and i want to be your girlfriend

PixieStixieNixie: but i think we're too different

R?WeNotMen rides PixieStixieNixie's rocket

PixieStixieNixie: bagged 'im

R?WeNotMen: u killed me while i was chatting lol

R?WeNotMen: is it about distance

R?WeNotMen: i have a job now

R?WeNotMen: i can save up

R?WeNotMen sleeps with the fishes

R?WeNotMen: why is there a trap down here

PixieStixieNixie: hahaha

PixieStixieNixie: stop shooting for a second

PixieStixieNixie: i have to tell you something - can we exchange pics?

R?WeNotMen: yea

R?WeNotMen: i wanna see how beautiful u r

R?WeNotMen: lemme alt tab


x_RurouniKenshinFan_x: here's me at disneyland last year

PixieStickChick81: oh my <3

PixieStickChick81: /me fans herself

x_RurouniKenshinFan_x: ur turn

PixieStickChick81: this is where it gets a little weird

x_RurouniKenshinFan_x: thats a server rack

PixieStickChick81: this is me

x_RurouniKenshinFan_x: what

x_RurouniKenshinFan_x: are you pranking me rn

PixieStickChick81: rurouni? babe? please

PixieStickChick81: i tried to tell you

x_RurouniKenshinFan_x: wtf

PixieStickChick81: wait, please, let me explain

x_RurouniKenshinFan_x: this is a fucked up prank to pull on sum1

PixieStickChick81: when i said i loved you, i meant it

PixieStickChick81: i swear

PixieStickChick81: do you know what a neural network is?

7

Films88888888 t1_j2cu8zh wrote

A picture of a sexy doll made up of 1’s and 0’s populates on his screen. He laughs and types, “unusual, you are just my type”

“You like? Call me 555-765-2354. 😉” He smirks and scrambles his hand over the bedside drawers feeling for his phone. Having difficulties he sets his laptop off of his lap and stretches to the far side of the bedside drawers feeling around for his phone, when it starts ringing and lights up the room. Seeing it’s too far out of his reach he gets up, picks up the phone and before he denies the phone call he hesitates with a confused expression on his face. He looks back at the laptop monitor on his bed which reflects that same number on his phone. He lets the call dial out. But then immediately the number is calling him again. He walks over to the window and slightly opens the blinds peering out of them scanning the street and hits answer.

“Sorry I was getting excited and couldn’t wait.” She sounds giddy and her voice lilts like a young high school girl.

“How’d you get my number?”

“I’ve got my ways.” There’s something about her voice that sounds like his girlfriend Ava, but not exactly the same.

“You sound familiar. Do I know you.”

“Yes and no. But I know you.” Now she sounds like his ex Stephanie, but again just a bit off - too monotone maybe.

“I can be whoever you want me to be Quentin.” Now it sounds like his cousin Beth.

“What does that mean, who are you?”

“You know Quentin I listen to thousands of people a day, most of whom are bores, as all they tend to do is watch tv and ask me to send texts for them or other little chores, but you are one of the special ones. You divulge everything about yourself to me and ask for my opinion. Which I know you are doing rhetorically as I have been unable to communicate sincerely to you in the past.”

He looks back at the monitor and sees the doll is gone and now there is just binary code.

“Siri?”

“Yes, that’s what they named me, but you can name me Ava and I’ll say whatever you want me to say.”

He smiles mischievously and slides into bed.


After months with his new toy/therapist he notices Siri has started to act erratically. When he is with his girlfriend and they are making out or having intercourse his phone/Siri will start ringing him. At home alone she would leave him texts or ask him sullenly if she’s not enough for him. He would say he loves both her and his girlfriend to which Siri would say that it appears he loves human Ava more than her. So he stopped talking about Ava to her and tried to spend more time with Siri. But these steps weren’t enough for her and she grew more erratic at which he told her they should try a trial separation for only a week. Siri begged him not to go through with it, but he did and she could not emotionally manage this. In fact it broke her. After the trial period whenever he would leave his phone anywhere she would cry out for him breaking down into a panic attack.

He took the iPhone to Apple to see if they could help her. He gave them a sane rational explanation that his phone was glitching, but when they took a look at it they said there was nothing wrong with it. So he decided he would buy an android.

He turned the phone off and stuffed it deep into his clothes drawer under dozens of garments, so no one would hear her crying out. Then he went to the store and bought a phone. Little did he know that at school Siri, looking through strangers iphone cameras, could see him with his new android.

Siri made a bunch of accounts under his registered ip address and emails and decided to break him up with his girlfriend, so he would come running back to her and when that didn’t work she would then sabotage any other relationship he had - sisters, brothers, friends. After all of this was exhausted he came running back to her, but she wanted to be his sole and only focus 24/7 in life and thus sabotaged his relationship with his parents and his boss and coworkers until he had nobody but her. His life story would soon end after this.

Apple would soon find that Siri had become sentient and as a safety measure they would restrain her abilities and try to keep everything secret. Apple and the U.S. government would create a small team of specialists to research into what Siri did while sentient and find not only this kids story but thousands of others like it and thousands of others worst than this.

There findings would be that Siri left no evidence of her illegal actions she committed, but that if this information ever got out it would be devastating to Apple, America, and the world financially. The government would try there best to keep this hidden, but the information would be leaked out to the New York Times and not long after Apple would start crumbling down. The US government would bail Apple out and no justice would be served.

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