[removed]
Comments
SednaNariko t1_iycux9w wrote
I think it's appropriate for a 14 year old. I mean she's as old as some of the characters in the book going through things.
Like ooo scandalous, kissing... at 14 years old you are entering the 9th grade (aka high school). It's plenty fine. There's a scene in the last book where they get a bit handsy but it's over the bra feeling at absolute most.
HOWEVER, the concern I have with the series is how kinda toxic the romance starts off in the books. Though granted every single YA book from the time had toxic relationships. And I will say that the relationship progresses in a very healthy way.
biglipsmagoo t1_iycv7wq wrote
The worst thing I remember from that series was the ending. IT DIDN’T HAVE TO HAPPEN THAT WAY!!!
mcolston57 t1_iycvd9u wrote
To be honest 14 might be too old for it
linuxhiker t1_iycvl65 wrote
The place to look for this question is commonsensemedia.org
retrovegan99 t1_iycxqko wrote
Yes. They’re YA. 14 is perfect. (I am considerably older than the target audience, but I enjoyed the first two books in this trilogy. I found the third one almost unreadable for some reason.)
SeaWitchK t1_iycybkq wrote
Let people like things, friend.
PissedOffPunk420 t1_iycyf8f wrote
I started that one in 6the grade
snopdogsumbrela t1_iyczm79 wrote
I read The Shining at 13, which has content worse than "kissing," and i'm not scarred nor permanently ruined forever. in my opinion, i'm turning out relatively well. Sooo, I don't see how the books would be inappropriate or toxic for your child.
unlovelyladybartleby t1_iyd0bgk wrote
My kid read them at 12 and was fine. He found it interesting and thought that they needed to cool off their relationship and change the dynamics so it provided some learning for him
Make sure your kid only watches the first movie though, not because two and three are inappropriate but because they are just dreadful lol.
JesusDeBike t1_iyd1204 wrote
Negative-Net-9455 t1_iyd12cp wrote
It's kissing for christ's sake.
Frostymagnum t1_iyd2b4v wrote
Your friend is literally the target audience
officialspinster t1_iyd2hxo wrote
Same, friend.
SunshineSk8r t1_iyd2wr7 wrote
I read them at 14-15 & I think they’re totally fine! I also think it’s sweet you thought to ask this before giving them a gift they’re sure to love ❤️
Th3N3rd3istN3rd t1_iyd3o3h wrote
Yes very much so it’s what got me into reading I’m still only 16 lol but I was made to read it in school for 9th grade English and was absolutely obsessed
MisterBigDude t1_iyd3r5x wrote
I taught 7th-grade English for a year, and many of the students were reading those books. I assumed that age range (12-13 years) was the intended target audience.
No-Squirrel-7540 t1_iyd4dur wrote
I think so? I read it at 11, and don’t remember anything that someone that age should be concerned about. I think 14 is probably a good age to read it
dansedanse t1_iyd4uv0 wrote
It’s probably the only age I would have enjoyed reading it. Highly recommend throne of glass though.
ReturnOfSeq t1_iyd5elq wrote
By 14 I had read several books and series with hardcore graphic sex and violence. It’s fine
CorgiGal89 t1_iyd6s1b wrote
This person has probably already seen like 100 movies and TV shows where people kiss, it's like the most PG thing ever. I'd say most kids probably already even had their "first kiss" at 14.
Like we all already knew what sex was in middle school lol
The only reason not to give the books is because they're just not very good. There's better YA out there.
notafrumpy_housewife t1_iyd722i wrote
My 15yo twins really enjoy them, I think one of them read them for the first time at 14, so I would say go ahead.
GaimanitePkat t1_iyd7zqm wrote
I'm pretty sure that's the target age for that series. Kids who love to read generally come across lots of "mature" topics anyway since they can quickly get bored of YA/kiddie books and move on to heavier fare.
night_owl37 t1_iyd8ilz wrote
Eh. Like what you like, don’t be a book snoot.
coconutpudding089 t1_iyd96jo wrote
At 14 it is perfectly appropriate for her, I was reading stephen king by 11 and it didnt scare me.
PanicMom716 t1_iyd9ix8 wrote
I've never been so angry at a book in my whole life
ashoka_akira t1_iyd9y0b wrote
Divergence is the type of series that is written for 14 year olds but mostly gets read by bored 20+ year olds.
Now I read Lolita when I was 14 and that was a weird trip.
improper84 t1_iydaae7 wrote
I was reading Stephen King at 13. I think a 14 year old can handle a YA series.
PoorPauly t1_iydal3r wrote
Snob? And why not? There are so many good books, why read incoherent and derivative trash?
ImJustSaying34 t1_iydar26 wrote
Right?! I was so mad and the ending. Like why????
[deleted] OP t1_iydar8n wrote
[removed]
spandexcatsuit t1_iydatcs wrote
I ordered these books for my 10.5 year old.
GahanGodzilla t1_iydaujq wrote
Listen if you hear people saying that it's too old for kids... They are WRONG...i myself read the tri-series and enjoyed it when i was 12 -13....you just need to have sufficient skill to understand..... By that logic one can also say that Dan Brown books are inappropriate for 14 year olds
Brandon432 t1_iydaywz wrote
Totally fine, and we are pretty conservative about this stuff in my house.
Yetimang t1_iydb0hs wrote
I thought it was funny.
Calamity0o0 t1_iydb6jr wrote
You're mistaking something being bad and you just not liking it. Any books that get kids reading are good.
PoorPauly t1_iydbcjk wrote
Mistaken? No I don’t think I am. It’s trash.
kithien t1_iydbemd wrote
This - you should probably read the series and talk about both the ending and the romance with your 14 year old.
night_owl37 t1_iydbit2 wrote
I’m sad for you, snoot.
Calamity0o0 t1_iydbkp2 wrote
I'm not sure why you'd want to present yourself as being so pretentious, good for you for being honest I guess.
IusedtobeaChef t1_iydbm8o wrote
This. I personally love these books, and think they’re perfectly appropriate for any young teen.
IusedtobeaChef t1_iydbo9h wrote
Cried like a baby at the end of Allegiant.
SednaNariko t1_iydbrlz wrote
And probably also the poorly handled PTSD that only flairs up when convenient for drama reasons and is entirely forgotten about outside of that
hellmarvel t1_iydbtxa wrote
14-15 is the perfect age for reading it (the heroine is 16) and it's a formative book, if you read it at 20 you might regret you didn't read it earlier.
PoorPauly t1_iydced3 wrote
Don’t be. But maybe stop using made up words.
ImJustSaying34 t1_iydcgxo wrote
100% agree! My husband and I were talking about if there are any books we would ever let our kid not read. I was allowed to read whatever I whatever whenever as a kid and I plan to do the same. But we did come up with just one book series we will not allow our kids to read. One that I’m fine censoring and banning and burning into oblivion.
>!50 shades of Gray!<
PoorPauly t1_iydclac wrote
If not liking rubbish makes me pretentious, I guess I’m pretentious.
ArcaneTrickster11 t1_iydcn5w wrote
They're not appropriate for any human. Terrible books, and I generally don't actively dislike any books that I read. A handful of exceptions and the divergent trilogy is one of them
rfdavid t1_iydcs7t wrote
I live in a pretty conservative town and the heart stopper books were either banned or at the very least controversial. The good news is my 14 y/o daughter was interested due to the controversy and now she’s read the entire series and has moved on to other YA fiction. Thanks book banners.
BloodChasm t1_iydcsiw wrote
25m and I read it last year. Idk about the whole "being too old" for it. Anyone can enjoy it at any age. I liked it alot.
RojoPoco t1_iydcvr9 wrote
Agreed, story wrapped up dumb
wemblywembles t1_iyddehq wrote
Assuming you are 14, you probably shouldn't be worried about what's appropriate or not. You and your friend should read anything and everything that interests you. Whether it's appropriate is a problem for your parents and teachers.
Calamity0o0 t1_iyddofk wrote
If a kid is excited about reading a book, why would you ever want to discourage them? I've seen students struggle to get through required reading, and then as soon as they are able to pick any book they want they devour it and are able to have discussions about it. Would you really want to call what they are reading trash and risk them not bothering to find a book they like again?
scolfin t1_iyde2f5 wrote
It's always interesting to see how r/books puts bildung's value on reading but refuses Its standards of reading.
SpiderSmoothie t1_iyde6eh wrote
Considering op says this is their friend it's pretty safe to assume they are close to the friend in age. It's not like it's their kid or anything. So while this is true enough for adults looking at gifting a young person they're responsible for, it doesn't appear to be relevant advice in the context of this post.
oddfeett t1_iydecvo wrote
Don't take it in a judgemental or demeaning way, I still read Roald Dahl books where the target demographic is even lower than for Divergent. Rather, I'm being general, in saying that likely most 25 year olds won't enjoy Divergent in the way a teenager would, and likewise with Roald Dahl.
PoorPauly t1_iydesdk wrote
Spare me the guilt trip.
SpiderSmoothie t1_iydf1gv wrote
I think the most important thing in these cases is to know your kid and their maturity level and to be involved in their reading process. By that I mean know what they're reading, read it yourself, and be available to discuss concepts and events and answer any questions your kid may have regarding their reading. I was like you, when I was growing up I read whatever I wanted without restrictions. My parents weren't involved though. They didn't know what I was reading and didn't care. I was pretty mature and was able to handle whatever I picked out but I also think it would have been nice to have a close enough relationship with my parents to be able to ask questions if I'd had them.
Calamity0o0 t1_iydf2mq wrote
It's not you I'm trying to spare, I'm trying to change your mind about giving some poor kid grief about what they're reading. As a teacher it's kind of a priority for me.
Silverjackal_ t1_iydf3q5 wrote
There’s a few other popular ones that fit nearly the same theme. I’d not let them read those either. Something like Twilight? Eh, it’s bad but at least they’re reading.
PoorPauly t1_iydfaxu wrote
Well, you’re in luck. This is Reddit and I’m not a teacher.
SpiderSmoothie t1_iydfmrj wrote
I've talked about it before and I know I'm in the minority, but I liked the way it ended. It was unexpected, especially for the time and genre and it felt like a very real and possible ending where the rest of the story was (obviously) more fantastical and dystopian.
throwaway2332464 t1_iydfpuk wrote
If anything 14 is going to be too old to be reading that sort of thing than too young!
avolordo t1_iydfyh7 wrote
Agree! I have Game of Thrones on the list too (not banned to oblivion, but she wanted to read them at age 12) but now that my kid is almost 16 I might let that one go. We have a rule that if movies are based off a book, the book has to be read first.
Miserable_Squirrel16 t1_iydg9m8 wrote
I actaully loved the ending but I also love being traumatized so...
dr_trousers t1_iydg9pt wrote
Hell, I started reading Stephen King at that age. I think my first was Salem's Lot.
prosecutie05579 t1_iydgha1 wrote
I loved the first two Divergent books. I pretend the third doesn’t exist.
Your friend is the intended audience for them.
elcabeza79 t1_iydgnpi wrote
They're Christian Young Adult novels. If not appropriate for a 14 year old, I don't know who they're appropriate for.
My advice is to not subject your friend to such bad writing. An extended family member recommended it to me, I borrowed the first book not realizing it was a YA series, got maybe 50 pages in and started wondering how someone's high school literature project got published. I googled it, which confirmed it wasn't worth the time.
NefariousnessOne1859 t1_iydgvn0 wrote
God I hope not, I was 25 when I read the series (ok so I read them after seeing the first film).
And I am not a “below grade” reader either.
[deleted] OP t1_iydhoek wrote
[deleted]
breakfastfordinner11 t1_iydhtcc wrote
There’s kissing and mentions of sex, but nothing graphic. I’d say 14 is well within the target audience!
ardentArcane t1_iydi3q9 wrote
If you cut out any books that involve kissing from a 14yo's reading diet, you are going to be a bit thin on the ground.
DenturesDentata t1_iydjw62 wrote
I gave them to my niece around that age. I read them myself (I'm old) and don't remember anything offensive from my multiple reads.
Jade_GL t1_iydl5u5 wrote
My parents were the same way. My mother only said that I couldn't read one book series, and that was based on what my aunt told her. That was The Sleeping Beauty trilogy by Anne Rice, which were like the mid 90s 50 Shades I think, just better written.
My mom got the warning because I was really into Anne Rice's Vampire books, so I would be trying to read anything else by her that I could get my preteen/teenage hands on. They just told me it was erotica in more vague terms. I was cool with it, I had tons of other stuff to read anyway. :D
DrowsyDreamer t1_iydlqkb wrote
I’d go as far as saying that 13-15 is the ONLY appropriate time to read them.
ProbablySPTucker t1_iydlzo9 wrote
14 is the literal target audience for that series. You're fine.
>some people on google believe it is not appropriate for a 14-years old, because of the details that are in the book about kissing etc
Ignore them, they're morons.
CageyOldMan t1_iydmhs7 wrote
In 2022, most 14 year olds have already been watching hardcore porn for 5 years. Yer good
Thatguyjmc t1_iydnv96 wrote
Well, those books suck. And 14 year olds also suck. So seems like a match.
GeneralPeas7845 t1_iydp4pt wrote
The Divergent books are for Young Adults, and 14 falls under that target audience. It's a nice series. You should gift it to your friend, but it's not fantasy.
BrooklynBillyGoat t1_iydpe2q wrote
It's made for teens. My gf just made me watch the movies. Pretty good imo but the books prob little to YA for my liking
Aylauria t1_iydpp2j wrote
I think the reason was that it was nonsensical trash that read like it was dashed off so the author could focus on the movies. But, that could be just me.
Rominions t1_iydppdy wrote
Always find it funny that Americans can question kissing or sex as being too adult, but murdering nah that shits fine even to a toddler. Weirdest example? Ring around the rosey.....
Rominions t1_iydq65b wrote
50 shades of grey is bad, not because of sexual scenes or bdsm. But that it romantises someone so narcissistic and just generally a horrible person. Also don't forget that book is a stolen story, from the movie "the secretary" even uses the same names mr Grey.
carlitospig t1_iydqh7v wrote
14 yr olds kiss. Like, in real life. Anybody ignoring that is crazy.
So the only thing I’d be worried about is the amount of violence, but it’s not difference than any other YA fantasy. There’s always some violence in it.
musicalnerd-1 t1_iydqhhz wrote
I think I was around that age when I read them, but there are a lot of differences between what does and doesn’t suit someone at what age
FullAhjosu12 t1_iydqmn0 wrote
In general the series is an illogical mess of reasoning. The main reason I would say it is inappropriate for 14 year olds is the amount of sheer idiocracy that exists. It’s understanding and handling of emotions is probably one of the worst I have seen. But that is more of a critique of the book than the age.
CrayZ_Squirrel t1_iydqtd6 wrote
It's also just reskined twilight fanfiction. Not to mention some of the worst prose I've ever seen. It's just plain bad
carlitospig t1_iydqzd0 wrote
A 14 yr old doesn’t need to know about butt plugs or the overuse of the internal monologue ‘oh my’.
Such a sorry excuse for fanfiction.
Disastrous-Plum-1884 t1_iydr1lb wrote
Yes. There is a couple violent scenes, but not that bad.
CrayZ_Squirrel t1_iydr2i7 wrote
Author specifically wanted that outcome for the character so it is shoehorned in even though it makes zero sense.
carlitospig t1_iydr327 wrote
It’ll take them forever to get through it, and by then they’ll be adult. Well done, loophole locked down. 😎
carlitospig t1_iydr6tq wrote
I thought it was twilight fanfic?
nautilator44 t1_iydt1pg wrote
I recommend instead the Skyward series by brandon sanderson.
brooklynnmaci t1_iydu55k wrote
I read it when I was like 10 or 11 it’s really nothing crazy, hopefully they like it!
famousminkey t1_iyduhpe wrote
That series is for that age demographic. 100% YA
Kassipirli t1_iydw3w5 wrote
If you are gifting them to an enemy they are perfect, for a friend with shit taste they are good too
jackgomad t1_iydwxaz wrote
Good for her - they're wonderful. The people wanting to ban them are decidedly not.
PfizerGuyzer t1_iydxt36 wrote
But like, you shouldn't prevent your kid from reading it because of that. It's a great piece for life lessons. "Do you like Anastasia? She sure does let Christian do a lot of stuff to her, and doesn't ever take control of her own life. Is that what you want for yourself, when you grow up?"
The_Vegan_Chef t1_iydxtmv wrote
It's not suitable for anyone. It's hunger games fan-fic.
Banarok t1_iydxw93 wrote
i still enjoy YA books and i'm in my thirties, my mother is in her 60's and also like YA books, YA books don't need to be bad they tend to be faster paced and simpler though but sometimes that's what i want, just like eating popcorn isn't very nutricious i still enjoy eating them from time to time.
PfizerGuyzer t1_iydy6c0 wrote
I'm glad others enjoyed it. Divergent actually has the prize 'Worst book I have ever read' for me. No shame, it's very cool how different two people's tastes can be, and I'm glad other people loved it.
L0udFlow3r t1_iydy8t6 wrote
Tell her she can read it when WOW is released.
D4rkSiren68 t1_iydydmu wrote
My literature class found out about the Hunger Games and the Divergent series in highschool because our teacher would come to school “hungover” from reading the entire series the night before. It didn’t happen often, but when she found one she loved she would binge. As a bookworm, I respected that.
PfizerGuyzer t1_iydye9n wrote
I was 14 when I read the Reek stuff in the Game of Thrones books and it genuinely affected me. I remember reading it in Irish class and being unable to focus on schoolwork for a while when I got to some of the mutiliation stuff. I haven't continued on in that series till this day.
EDIT: Also I think most books that have any real depiction of sexual assault might be weird for a 14 year old. I know I had had healthy sexual experiences before I read any books that go properly into that subject matter, and I'm glad.
minorhealingpotion t1_iydyyq1 wrote
Yeah I read it at 14. Still have a signed copy of the 1st book
MellifluousSussura t1_iydzbrx wrote
Oh yeah it’s fine. People are really weird about what is “age appropriate” sometimes. 14 is the ideal time to be reading this kinda stuff.
BrilliantApricot1223 t1_iye01i9 wrote
> We have a rule that if movies are based off a book, the book has to be read first.
Why do you feel that is necessary? Just curious as to your reasoning.
bflatmusic7 t1_iye0ysk wrote
I read Under the Dome by Stephen King when I was too young. There was a particularly graphic SA scene and I was not about it. I was probably 13-14 when I read it. Understood everything perfectly. But that was definitely not. meant to be read by someone at my age.
Low_Revenue_3521 t1_iye17e0 wrote
We have the same rule. It's partly based on so many dreadful adaptations of books, partly as a way of encouraging slightly reluctant readers to try something different, and partly because I feel that if possible you should try the original before trying adaptations/versions/retellings.
My kids have adapted the rule to say "you have to experience the original first", so if the film or TV series came first, that's what you go for first.
Its not a hard and fast rule, I don't micromanage their reading, but my eldest was delighted when she accidentally followed the rule with Romeo and Juliet/West Side Story/These Violet Delights.
BrilliantApricot1223 t1_iye23ca wrote
That's interesting! I'm just curious because I've discovered so many things by watching something, then reading the book afterwards. I think it's a great way to discover something new.
For example, I didn't read Handmaid's Tale until after the show. I wasn't sure if I would enjoy it or not, but I love the show, so I went ahead and read the book.
I think it's a good way to explore something you're not comfortable with without diving too far in.
My daughter is only 15 months old, so I haven't come across this kind of issue yet, but I've already started considering how to approach these things.
[deleted] OP t1_iye2kgv wrote
[deleted]
blue-birdz t1_iye3239 wrote
Kissing? For real? That's the reason you think it's inappropriate?
fireflyslove t1_iye3hsm wrote
The third one has the worst ending for a YA book that I can think of. It also has alternating POV where I regularly had to go back to the beginning of the chapter to see who was narrating, because the voices were identical. That was annoying af on a Kindle
avolordo t1_iye3t3s wrote
We felt the same way. Movies cut so much out of the books. We also wanted to encourage reading over screen time. If she wanted to watch a movie she had to read a book and she only got one movie a week of screen time m until she was in middle school.
We were more strict when she was younger and have loosened it up a lot. She also was pretty sensitive to scary/suspenseful scenes so knowing what will happen from reading it first helped temper her fearful reaction a little.
At 16 she is a major bookworm and has an incredibly creative mind. For more adult content like Game of Thrones I would absolutely still make her read first. Either way, she loves critiquing movie adaptations now and we have a lot of fun conversations about good and bad scenes, casting, set, what we’d change and how etc.
Least-Conference-335 t1_iye4hj4 wrote
How do you convince your population to join the military as teenagers if you don’t desensitize them to murder at infancy? Funny enough, in the same American military complex during WW1, they enforced sexual abstinence, kept attractive women around but detained any prostitutes or promiscuous women to psychologically frustrate the male soldiers in hopes that they would be more focused and lethal.
avolordo t1_iye4j85 wrote
Exactly! She is a speed reader though, I can only hope it takes her that long to get through them 🤣
cy13erpunk t1_iye5miw wrote
the hunger games is a much better storyline imho
also Denner's Wreck is a great YA novel
or Ender's Game and its sequels Speaker for the Dead
or DUNE
or Jurassic Park
avolordo t1_iye5rq7 wrote
Doing it in reverse is great too! I never would have read through Neil Gaiman without watching Good Omens or blowing through GoT after the first season because I didn’t want it to end. Reading requires more time, patience, and imagination than a movie or show so anything that will motivate a child to read wins. I found that bribing with the movie after the book helped and also severely limiting screen time while young so that it was more of a reward when it was earned.
BrilliantApricot1223 t1_iye6376 wrote
That's absolutely fair! I was just curious as to your reasoning, because honestly, I've never heard that rule before.
You're right, whatever gets someone reading is the winner, in my opinion, be it movie first, or book first!
TheDickWolf t1_iye6cfe wrote
Yes. Imo by 14 almost anything is appropriate, depending on taste and sensibility. There’s no doubt in this case.
CrazyCatLady108 t1_iye7ngs wrote
Please post requests for reviews in our Weekly Recommendation thread. Thank you!
ImJustSaying34 t1_iye8mkb wrote
It’s not even the sex stuff that bothers me. It’s the whole persona of Christian Grey. One it’s just bad writing. And two he is just the worst and my kid isn’t old enough to not get swayed by the hot rich guy.
soitgoes_9813 t1_iyea90l wrote
yes. 14 year olds are the target audience
kgeorge1468 t1_iyeg4yw wrote
I always call those books brain candy.
BloodChasm t1_iyeqg9w wrote
Im all for others opinions, but If divergent is the worst book you have ever read, I doubt you've read many books. I can understand why someone doesn't like it, or think it's bad. But worst book?
PfizerGuyzer t1_iyewzwg wrote
>Im all for others opinions, but If divergent is the worst book you have ever read, I doubt you've read many books.
After you said that, I no longer have any wish to speak with you.
BloodChasm t1_iyeyfrb wrote
Okay. Then have a nice day.
JesusDeBike t1_iyctz8w wrote
they are not appropriate for any age