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WhenRobLoweRobsLowes t1_j28pdkr wrote

This is not a book to give as a gift. Jesus...

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WolfD_red OP t1_j28ppz5 wrote

Glad I ask here first. Do you have any idea which book I can give her instead?

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WhenRobLoweRobsLowes t1_j28qs8h wrote

Sorry, books are often very personal choices, so random suggestions aren't helpful.

Only thing I would say is give her a book that you personally loved with a note that says just that: "This may not be your speed, but I loved this book and hope you will too."

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WolfD_red OP t1_j28sqwq wrote

It's okay but I am new on reading books, I finished 3 books, two, we both read with our friend group. He's Into Her and One of us is lying then 1984 by George Orwell which I doubt she would like. I am currently reading Dune by Frank Herbert.

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Ishin_Na_Telleth t1_j28u950 wrote

Maybe fo a "voucher" for a book buddy experience, she picks the book you'll buy the books and read it at the same time

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captqueefheart t1_j28qllq wrote

What books have you read that you enjoyed?

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WolfD_red OP t1_j28sg57 wrote

I am new on reading books compared to her. The books that I enjoyed are 1984 by George Orwell, One of us is lying and he's into her which both, we read and discussed with our circle of friends. I am really struggling to give her anything as I know our friend group would give her colleen hoover's book and I don't want to give her a duplicate.

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captqueefheart t1_j28v2ag wrote

Sounds like you're into sci-fi. Is that something that might also interest her? Maybe a sci-fi novel written by a woman...? You can never go wrong with Ursula K Le Guin, imo

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boxer_dogs_dance t1_j28zb93 wrote

I would ask this on r/suggestmeabook also explaining something about her interests

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taperwaves t1_j28zdry wrote

The Last Lecture is one of the top books I gift.

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ManyCats247 t1_j28rcgk wrote

I think triggering and traumatic books make terrible gifts, honestly. I was loaned the book by a coworker who swore it was so amazing, and unfortunately I just could not finish it, and it still creeps into my dreams. I was upset with my coworker for not telling me how descriptive and awful it was. I wish I'd never read it.

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WolfD_red OP t1_j28t2bx wrote

I fee sorry for you. Hope you are somehow recovering. Glad I asked here first before giving it to her.

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ManyCats247 t1_j28vo5j wrote

Thank you for the support here. When someone asks an opinion about a book containing violence, torture or sexual abuse, I hesitate to give an opinion because often someone comes along to neg me for feeling the way I feel. I think people should be made aware of potentially triggering books. I was held hostage by a man in his dark apartment while he held the door shut and attempted to take my clothes off and harass me to have sex with him. I was at his apartment to pick up a bed that I had purchased. The situation went dark fast. So the spot in this book where the young girl was trapped in this man's cellar (?) And she realized that she was in extreme danger, it brought back that situation and all the fear and darkness. It's a struggle to not feel as if I am back in the apartment.

Thanks for your compassion.

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WebWitch89 t1_j28zazx wrote

I’m so sorry you had to go through that.

I remember trying to read it when I was 19 or so, and couldn’t get through it.

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ManyCats247 t1_j290fh3 wrote

Awww, I feel you. It's funny because I knew someone was going to die. I knew that going into the book. But the author is quite gifted in making the story feel real. It was a bit too real for me!

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books-ModTeam t1_j291v41 wrote

Per Rule 2.1: Please conduct yourself in a civil manner.

Civil behavior is a requirement for participation in this sub. This is a warning but repeat behavior will be met with a ban.

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Difficult-Albatross7 t1_j28rm95 wrote

Nope, unless you want to traumatise them. Plus the author was involved in the wrongful conviction of an innocent man that had some massively sketchy elements to it.

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WolfD_red OP t1_j28tii8 wrote

No! Definitely not! I just want her to have a good cry, a book that she would enjoy crying to. And discuss it with her. I will try to look for another book. Someone recommend The time traveler's wife the Traveling Cat Chronicles, I will try to find either of them. Thank you for the insight!

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TheEntropicOrder t1_j291458 wrote

Does she want to cry? This seems like a weird thing to want for someone else.

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ComeScoglio t1_j292pb0 wrote

She said herself, often and in different interviews and articles she wrote, that she was deeply sorry and that her trauma was such that she couldn't remember details of her assault. No one can give the man his life back, absolutely no one, but to blame her and only her for his wrongful conviction is too easy a way out. There's a society where women often get raped, not believed, and are forced to re-live their trauma during the investigation. There's a whole system in place that routinely put black men in jail on scant evidence. There's another system that makes it very hard to overturn a wrongful conviction.

It's awful that the man went through that. But it's also awful that the woman went through that. It's not right, I think, to put the blame squarely on her shoulders.

I may change my mind when I get older, but for now, this is how I view it.

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Difficult-Albatross7 t1_j2al6ql wrote

Totally agree about not blaming her, I read Lucky the non fiction account of her rape. It was horrible in every way you imagine it to be. As you say there are two very flawed systems at work here. From memory she walked past him and was blind sided by her reaction and 100% sure it was him. Pretty obviously a trauma response but damn the guy lost like 20 years of his life to that. Didn't know about her response whole thing is just sad really 😔

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RideThatBridge t1_j28pqh9 wrote

I wouldn't give it as a gift to an 18yr old if I didn't know them really well. I read it in my late 20's and it was tough.

I would pick something else; a book in general is an awesome gift!

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uncreativemonkey t1_j28x4ek wrote

I read it when I was 15, and my mom was appalled. Little did she know I read Carrie when I was 13. But yeah, definitely not a great gift idea unless there a bit older and/or you know the person well.

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RideThatBridge t1_j28zp3s wrote

Yeah-I’ve been reading King since about 12. I can handle scary and paranormal more than I can handle real life violence.

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dumbxblondex t1_j28pei1 wrote

It’s an amazing read and thanks for reminding me it exists. Do you know if she has any trauma surrounding the things the description laid out, or doesn’t like that kind of read? If I remember correctly, it gets pretty intense but there are great parts too. If she does not, I would gift it to her!

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WolfD_red OP t1_j28qkx5 wrote

No, she don't have any trauma at all. She loves to read romance fictions that has sad/ tragic endings and she's emotional so I would like to give her that book something that isn't doesn't involve lovers but family and something I know she'll bawl to.

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MarieReading t1_j28sieb wrote

I would say The Traveling Cat Chronicles if you want a sad ending (No trauma or abuse). It's a short read and everyone I know that's read it has enjoyed it.

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ehuang72 t1_j28www8 wrote

Only if you know her well and even then.

I've read this book and think Alice Sebold is wonderful but if you are only slightly acquainted with this classmate, it's too personal and IMO borderline creepy to gift it, Especially if you are male.

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kgeorge1468 t1_j299e7n wrote

^^this I'd give it to a close friend only if I knew it was on their TBR list or if it would interest them and NOT trigger them. But you need to be super close to someone to know if that kind of material is triggering...honestly, I'd probably do a lighter book for a gift

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The_last_melon1 t1_j28vd68 wrote

Depends on her personality, if someone gave this to me as a gift I would have been so so thankful! One of my favorite books, however I am a little quirky and strange

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Top-Race-7087 t1_j28v2g0 wrote

Not this wonderful book - I couldn’t stop crying. I read it and cried. Not a bday gift.

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Cute_Frog_5 t1_j28x5rg wrote

One of my most recent favorites is A Man Called Ove by Fredrick Backman. It is feel good, thought provoking, sad, happy. I felt so many things while reading it. 10/10

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ihaveneverbeenwise t1_j28yew4 wrote

This is a tricky one as you can see from people's responses! I would probably recommend it in person after checking that she's ok with the themes and the content but probably not give it as a gift. For a quick-ish read that sounds like her cup of tea (romance, will make her cry) I would recommend Suzanne's Diary for Nicholas by James Patterson. It's not his usual type of book, and every time I've read it I've cried my eyes out. I really like it. Perhaps you could also get a copy for yourself to read since she'd like to discuss her gifts afterwards? You can talk about your quest to find her a book she'd love and how it felt adding another book to your list, as well as what you thought of the book and if it made you cry too. I think buying her a book is a lovely idea! Good luck on your search.

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The_Soviette_Tank t1_j28zaf9 wrote

I thought the ending was shite in terms of writing. Go with the 'book buddy' plan!

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books-ModTeam t1_j291rsy wrote

Hi there. Per rule 3.3, please post book recommendation requests in /r/SuggestMeABook or in our Weekly Recommendation Thread. Thank you!

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