Got a friend who’s willing to pop up near the end of services as the Great Prophet Zarquon?

“Er... Hello. Er, look, I'm sorry I'm a bit late. I've had the most ghastly time, all sorts of things cropping up at the last moment... Er, how are we for time? Have I got just a min...”

Aaaaaaand that’s it. Go in peace. Hail and farewell to your dad.