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the_stooge_nugget t1_jefcliw wrote

He gave a warning about not giving a warning


Notsnowbound t1_jef9gju wrote

Imagine parking your bike here and some crazed fellow comes running out of the building at you with a giant, blood stained pair of scissors...


Clenplate t1_jefi2r2 wrote

Bet they haven't had a bike problem since, though.


vtssge1968 t1_jefsj31 wrote

I chain my bike anywhere, but I probably wouldn't there


Ok_Basil_3896 t1_jefspzb wrote

You wouldn’t chain it to your cock after he got ahold of you


Smellmuhfinger OP t1_jefsekk wrote

I Can confirm. I was working across the street for the past week and I did not see any bike on the fence.


Rhodog1234 t1_jefu8q3 wrote

Then there'll be a bunch of eunuchyclists hanging around...

I'll see myself out.


Sayoria t1_jefhl1c wrote

Already had mine cut off. Checkmate, sign poster.


eternalankh t1_jefw6td wrote

Ohh it's supposed to say "Locks" I get it.


Windamyre t1_jegrl0x wrote

Yea. I did say "locks" until someone either painted the sign or edited the photo. The first letter is blocky instead of round.


Yago20 t1_jefpjod wrote

IMO, this is more about meeting fire code than just being a dick. Looks to be a fire hose hookup right there.


brucee10 t1_jeglo95 wrote

Someone locked their bike up to the front gate of our building. It swung inwards and we were all stuck until our landlord came by and cut the bike frame. The bike lock hung there for a decade as a warning. I loved that crazy man.


Smellmuhfinger OP t1_jefukk3 wrote

That’s actually for the heating oil. But I didn’t to check to see if the fire hose connection is there also.


Bgrngod t1_jefveud wrote

I hope this doesn't apply to people riding past on their bikes.

"I was just riding to work! Why did you cut my dick off?"

"I warned you about no warnings it would happen!"


WhatACunningHam t1_jefeyan wrote

Those are two separate messages, so you are, in fact, not safe even without a bike.


PillowTalk420 t1_jegmd3x wrote

My sister (MTF trans): I need to borrow your bike...


averagebenzdriver t1_jegp8xc wrote

There's a loophole here, women can avoid following this rule without a problem, as they don't have cocks


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LeTouatteRatte t1_jef9fyc wrote

Sounds fair to me. It said no bicycles!


_Noobyboy_ t1_jefenqv wrote

What if you’re a lady ?


LeTouatteRatte t1_jefg03b wrote

A real lady never leaves her home without a cock in her purse, in case she stumbles upon a cock fight, or finds herself in need of a wake up alarm.


nyetsub t1_jefo4p2 wrote

Did you or did you not vote to decriminalize public urination...


DadsRGR8 t1_jefrzqe wrote

At least give us a 2 minute head start to run away.


gideon513 t1_jefsevj wrote

Isn’t the sign a warning though?


Cichlidsaremyjam t1_jefwajq wrote

When I was a kid someone changed the 50 sign in our town to 69 and this has a similar vibe.


BarfingOnYourFace t1_jefy888 wrote

If this was in my city, i would have assumed it would be a warning if you lock you bike there, someone will steal it.


rvmay99 t1_jeg115u wrote

Thi sign is sexist and biased against guys. What happens if a girl parks the bike?


missmypbj t1_jeg3ft8 wrote

Font and spelling do matter!


sharksnut t1_jeg5shy wrote

My wife keeps parking my bike there


_fuffs t1_jegc0vy wrote

Poor guy must be having some grudge with cyclists.


501102 t1_jegq4eg wrote

Those without cocks are welcome to park


trurlo t1_jegsbdm wrote

The top-hatted pipe-man had a jolly good night...


varemaerke t1_jegzgjv wrote

I once saw one that said

NO BICYCLES will be removed without warning

I thought that was considerate of them.


dickcheney600 t1_jegzidh wrote

Someone drew on it, but still funny either way. It's supposed to say "locks"


AndyDoesGamesALot t1_jeh5i6n wrote

You never seen the Eunuch Unicycle Club?? They had a funny name but I can’t remember it.


R3DGRAPES t1_jeglcvc wrote

If someone parked their car in your driveway and was nowhere in sight, wouldn’t you call a tow company? I don’t think it’s extreme of someone to cut a bike chain locked onto their property.