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ATXMark7012 t1_iycpnmg wrote

It's not a criminal, clearly it was framed.

286

Cyanopicacooki t1_iycpuq9 wrote

I was going to say, OP is a stoolie, trying to finger an innocent person.

62

baldieman t1_iycqh0x wrote

A fish finger to boot.

29

Irishpanda1971 t1_iydmn6m wrote

Don't put fish finger there, that's not where it goes. At least use some custard if you're gonna put it there.

4

LaszloKravensworth t1_iyde0jm wrote

Sounds like OP is the criminal for fingering the framed

2

genaugenaugenau t1_iydl6ql wrote

I’ve spent 3 minutes trying to work the appropriate Bob’s Burger reference in response. Can we just pretend I did successfully and call it a day?

3

LaszloKravensworth t1_iydubyq wrote

Just the fact that you appreciate Bob Belcher enough to try and emulate him absolves you. Go with grace, my child.

6

GStapes t1_iycv63c wrote

He didn’t kill his wife! It was the one-armed man!

3

OldBob10 t1_iyepw00 wrote

I will go up to the six-fingered man and say, “Hallo. My name is Inigo Montoya. You killed my father. Prepare to die”.

2

Joran_Dax t1_iyd6poj wrote

He was in too deep with the Mafishoso and now he's swimming with the humans.

3

hebbeb123 t1_iyctlbn wrote

While it says it’s framed, it is clearly lying!

It is packaged, not framed.

2

geogeezer t1_iyd0iqa wrote

The frozen fish aisle is full of innocent fish

2

trro16p t1_iydhtwv wrote

That's right!

The Trout did it! He did it for the Halibut!

2

jordantask t1_iydvbll wrote

It also doesn’t say anything about being convicted.

2

OldBob10 t1_iyerlxw wrote

Twenty-seven indictments, no convictions. 😁

2

timespassing_ t1_iycpwkw wrote

Objection, hearsay!

27

Ezekiel2121 t1_iycql4v wrote

Objection, speculation!

7

timespassing_ t1_iycqqr7 wrote

For the record, you haven’t established jurisdiction.

7

Waterfish3333 t1_iycsvk4 wrote

“Subject matter jurisdiction”. Also, this is a maritime court! /s

6

vujad3097 t1_iyd1gn2 wrote

Rrrrr now me hearties, be this dispute of a Nautical or of a Private Maritime nature?

2

Joddodd t1_iydew80 wrote

Parley?

2

vujad3097 t1_iydt98o wrote

Rrrr now, tis it a Parsley ye be asking for?

Yon wee fish were framed some be saying, but "Framed and suitable for hanging?" I be asking.

2

Its_Just_A_Typo t1_iyehp0h wrote

I object your honor!

Listen to the prosecution here; clearly my client was framed - Even he alludes to the facts in this matter!

2

[deleted] t1_iyeb67j wrote

[deleted]

1

timespassing_ t1_iyf0y54 wrote

I actually started out thinking I made a Heard/Depp joke… but I’m amused so whatevs!

2

[deleted] t1_iyf2k0p wrote

[deleted]

1

timespassing_ t1_iyf2sps wrote

The part I watched of Brooks was heavier on objection, grounds. There was a whole music video made of objection, hearsay from Heard/Depp.

1

animaishi t1_iycq5p9 wrote

I thought they were pretty susfishious

16

Hexacus t1_iycpx6m wrote

Im from norway and that is a criminal refugee! Please hand it back to us so we can put it behind bars..

10

HughJanus35 t1_iyezzg5 wrote

The prisons are like 3-star hotels when compared to others lol

4

Sillyviking t1_iyd7y7e wrote

You've been hit by

You've been struck by

A smooth swiminal!

7

Phandroid1991 t1_iycr3pt wrote

The Salmon lost its case when it started smoking.

6

Normanzzzz t1_iye2qqn wrote

did the detectives grill him?

5

TooManyTasks4 t1_iycr6pw wrote

That fish is innocent. He was framed I tell ya!

4

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1

Callabrantus t1_iycrcvu wrote

Sadly, this poor bastard got shrink wrapped. I hope as the dill cream sauce is drizzled over him, he takes comfort in knowing there is another salmon out there who will be constantly looking over his shoulder as he swims upstream.

Maybe a bear will swat him out of the river. Fuck, I stopped caring.

1

joakimk84 t1_iycreli wrote

Im norwegian, I where looking for that guy. Bastard, stole my worms last time I when boating.

1

Sadgud t1_iycrfdp wrote

So many funny commets here LOL😂

1

Sarato88 t1_iycro75 wrote

Americans need instruction on cleaning the utensils on the meat packaging?

1

TriPPinG91 t1_iycseww wrote

I wouldn’t be eating that if it was farmed in Norway after I have seen the conditions it needs locking up

1

ClubThrower t1_iyctr9j wrote

Oh yeah, the old caught swimming the wrong way on a one-way stream. It’s a serious crime, punishable by death as you can see.

1

great9 t1_iyd60hm wrote

That 0.705 lb is 300 grams. 100 grams is $3.05

100 grams in EUROPE is about $4.10 in LIDL, Aldi when not on sale.

1

AV196 t1_iyd95fj wrote

Meanwhile in Norway, where the fish was farmed, I have to pay the equivalent of 45 Eur per kg.

1

great9 t1_iyd98j2 wrote

What's your net salary?

0

AV196 t1_iydbruh wrote

About 35k Eur. But I have a prestigious higher education.

0

great9 t1_iydbvyx wrote

Ok so about 3k euro / month net.

0

AV196 t1_iydcbrc wrote

Little less, but I get paid in kroner. So the equivalent, yes.

0

great9 t1_iydvhwq wrote

>The average monthly gross salary in Norway in 2018 was 45610 NOK. With no special deductions, this becomes 31167 NOK after tax.

Quora says you're getting paid an average norwegian salary with your prestigious higher education.

I think Aldi is adjusting these prices based on average NET salary for the country

−1

AV196 t1_iyeh9s4 wrote

Your point being? There are very small differences in Norway, a prestigious education isn’t worth a lot here.

We don’t have Aldi. We aren’t part of your EU food markets.

0

great9 t1_iyeq175 wrote

>Your point being? There are very small differences in Norway, a prestigious education isn’t worth a lot here.

You mentioned prestigious education, I just repeated it.

​

>We don’t have Aldi. We aren’t part of your EU food markets.

No, but the manufacturer is.

1

AV196 t1_iyeqclk wrote

No, the manufacturer exports into EU markets actually.

I’m still interested in your point of mentioning average salaries and comparing it to mine. You have to elaborate.

1

great9 t1_iyeqj1u wrote

pricing is adjusted to average salary

1

Any_Chart45 t1_iyd8o4k wrote

What's more criminal is that price!!

1

KenKefery t1_iyebsfe wrote

farmed salmon is for the most part, gross

1

currentdream OP t1_iyf47dx wrote

guys I didn’t buy it it’s a joke!

1

doomtoothx t1_iyf6j1j wrote

Since the fish is no longer in Norway it is safe to say that it is on the lamb.

1

kgb4187 t1_iyfa736 wrote

Bill Posters is innocent

1

toepimp t1_iyfahpf wrote

In England and Wales, Section 32 of the Salmon Act 1986 makes it illegal to hold salmon under ‘suspicious circumstances’ 🤣

1

ReaperSound t1_iyfdm62 wrote

I'm over here in America wondering why you got fish shipped from Norway.

1

mifuneh t1_iycsjbi wrote

Fucking Salmon…always the victim.

0

brkeng1 t1_iyctu2l wrote

I know a good lawyer in bird law. But this appears to be fish law however, going to have to do some searching on this one. Perhaps the bird lawyer can refer us to a good fish lawyer.

0

AndreKR- t1_iycu0am wrote

Is this "handling salmon in suspicious circumstances"?

0

einat162 t1_iycu1ab wrote

A smooth criminal .

0

hybridmike772 t1_iycvki2 wrote

The Cod's said it was me, but I was framed. I think they are being shellfish 🦐

0

NorwegianGirl_Sofie t1_iycz4c0 wrote

I might have to confiscate it.

It escaped from the breeding facility, stole one of the employees snowscooters and escaped down to the nearest airport.

We have been searching for him the last couple of days... Finally we found him.

Timothy the Salmon.

0

RPDRNick t1_iyd04d0 wrote

Who Framed Stuart Salmon? was the little known Norwegian Roger Rabbit sequel.

0

ItsEyeJasper t1_iyd07hj wrote

Poor basted. Framed, Excuted and now Pan seared.

0

mynineforu t1_iyd1srf wrote

He was unjustly sent up the river

0

jerodsappsucker t1_iyd208q wrote

i live in Oregon and have seen many frozen “wild” salmon with product of China on the label. almost wanna cry. 😛

0

APoorBillionaire t1_iyd4gwo wrote

That fish, sir, is no criminal. He was clearly framed!

Also, the fish law in this country is abhorrent.

0

Dbohnno t1_iyd4rvn wrote

The Steven Avery edition

0

Hashhole t1_iyd8m92 wrote

It was the one armed fish that killed my wife!

0

jbsinger t1_iydd9sz wrote

No, its a piece of art.

0

[deleted] t1_iydhnhm wrote

Thy fish is not the criminal. Thy fish was framed!

0

hrudnick t1_iydi5ku wrote

Salmon is the new chicken.

0

ham-slappin t1_iydo76h wrote

Buy it and extradite that sucker. Let Norway decide its fate.

0

Varttaanen t1_iydol81 wrote

Roger Rabbit wants to join the conversation

0

Skivling t1_iydqx9h wrote

Hang in on the wall.

0

Ghia149 t1_iyds3fn wrote

He’s innocent!

0

Critya t1_iydu3ky wrote

This took me longer than it should have -.-

0

Pineapple-Due t1_iye4ruo wrote

No, you bought an innocent fish from the store.

0

Aluna_Lacewing t1_iye5j9d wrote

He wasn't a criminal. He was framed!!!

0

moxiejohnny t1_iye6lda wrote

You should take a picture and frame it.

0

sabacain t1_iyeaw25 wrote

Andy Dufresne as a fish

0

Rayquaza384 t1_iye31ks wrote

Damn $13 a pound, here in Ontario Canada our Salmon is over $30 a pound.

−1

B00gy187 t1_iycz02b wrote

It is criminal you bought farmed salmon. Disgusting. Only buy wild salmon you’ll thank me later

−3