Street Harassment near Holland Hotel

Submitted by Dense-Spinach-1901 t3_10whjej in jerseycity

My girlfriend and I were walking back to Newport from behind the Newport mall earlier today around 6:30 PM and 3 15-16 years boys harassed and abused us. I wasn’t sure what to do in this situation, and I just kept walking. They abused us, made sexual comments, threw stones and some weird stuff from the street on our backs as we kept walking. The entire episode would have lasted 1-2 mins. Couldn’t call the cops since there wasn’t much time. Not sure what I could have done to better handle the situation. Or what I can do now.

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hxc-ufoz t1_j7ncvvc wrote

They're at the age where you can't legally retaliate, which sucks but it means you have to be careful. I'm a tall, somewhat imposing man, and even still dude. When I see a raucous crowd of teenage boys I don't know, honestly I will sometimes cross the street.

I remember being that age. They're shit heads and it's easy for a group of friends to egg each other on into doing bad things.

It sounds like you did the right thing OP. All you could have done to retaliate was bark at them, say that you'll call the cops -- maybe they'd disperse, but if anything, you're just increasing the risk to yourself and your girl of being harmed.

In a position like that you do whatever you can to help her feel safe. It can't hurt to use your voice at least, but beyond that the move is definitely to exit the situation as quickly as possible.

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Laraujo31 t1_j7phefj wrote

If you feel that your life is in danger and they start hitting you, you are within your right to defend yourself. That does not mean pull out a gun and start shooting though.

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noodle_spam t1_j7o0003 wrote

>They're at the age where you can't legally retaliate

I sincerely don't understand that. If a bunch of thugs attack you, how comes you don't have legal rights to retaliate to defend yourself? Why there age matter, especially if you can't say if they are 17 or already 18? Hell, even if you know for a fact they are 16? They still can damage, rape or kill you.

I think what you are saying is misinformation. Can you quote a law?

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hxc-ufoz t1_j7pebk2 wrote

Without spending my morning digging through the state statutes — minors in general are granted special protections under the law.

If the encounter really got out of hand, how can he prove he was provoked? And not only that, but sufficiently provoked to warrant an adult striking a minor.

See where this is going? You can bet a judge and jury will have little sympathy for someone who has physically maimed a child. I wouldn’t expect his fellow inmates to look highly on such behavior, either.

The letter of the law isn’t all that matters

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AbazabaYouMyOnlyFren t1_j7p1ypm wrote

TIL Kyle Rittenhouse moved to JC.

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Finesseer t1_j7pgngc wrote

Just roll over and get beat up by a gang of high schoolers, you pansy

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AbazabaYouMyOnlyFren t1_j7pydxh wrote

Make one little joke about a guy's post history and all of the insecure little shits come out of the woodwork.

You sound triggered jerkoff, nobody is rolling over. Fact is the odds we're against this guy.

All that happened was some words said and some shit thrown at them. Not fun but also better than ending up in the hospital, the morgue, jail, in a lawsuit, or even sitting in your house with a black eye.

He did the right thing by not engaging.

There's nothing but downsides to it. If you beat up a bunch of kids, you beat up kids. If you get beaten up, you got your ass kicked by a bunch of kids. Both scenarios because even though you're a grown ass adult, you've got a fragile ego that can't handle mean words.

You don't know WHY they're baiting you. Maybe one has a gun or a knife or there's a bunch of their friends down the block with baseball bats.

Hustle up and GTFO of there, you're not getting a check at the end of that fight. As long as no one gets hurt, who fucking cares?

If they grab you, then beat their asses, but that's not what happened here so shut your pie hole and go live your revenge fantasy somewhere else.

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flapjack212 t1_j7nqrio wrote

I've been harassed and threatened several times on the streets of downtown jersey city, every time by teens. I frankly just stay away from teens now.

I have indeed thought many times about what I could've / should've done, it's somewhat comforting to see many people agree here there's not that much to do.

None of the situations ended in violence so perhaps de-escalation and trying to get away is ultimately the best answer... sorry this happened to you too.

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glo46 t1_j7obg0c wrote

gif

This

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Sorry-Nose-7667 t1_j7n5m3c wrote

The only thing you could have done was called the police. That’s about it.

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lucidrevolution t1_j7pik8y wrote

I have been in Jersey City since I was 10, and so I went to school here (public school) and have lived in various areas and spent a good deal of time out and about at all hours the evening once I was older or when I was younger and being reckless with my friends... One thing I have observed is groups of young people (sometimes male sometimes female or coed) trying to egg someone into a fight.

They wanted you to do something so they could beat you up and laugh about it. They don't care about getting caught, and I've seen it turn into a "game" for people running away from the cops, switching outfits, etc. Getting locked up is street cred for some juveniles, a rite of passage perhaps. They have already decided there is no point in doing something better with their lives because this is literally the world they know and how they choose to communicate.

As usual JC focused a lot of the incoming luxury people over the years and the more recent residents always seem to be upset that the poor people who were displaced still in fact exist and their kids are out of control. I'm not excusing the behavior, just saying this is part of the problem overall when we don't give a shit about people who have less and only focus on the people who have more. The people who have less struggle a lot, work multiple jobs, etc... and these kids who are doing these aggressive or violent actions unfortunately don't see that there is something better for them.

Let the downvoting begin, I realize everyone just wants the aggro gangbanger kids to disappear but it's a deeply systemic problem. If you want it to change, then do some outreach to the local youth and help build healthy mentorships that keep them from feeling hopeless and resorting to petty street crimes and unprovoked violence. I can't think of any other solutions.

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b1tchonwheelz t1_j7yq71e wrote

This is the best response! As a Jersey City native you know!

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lucidrevolution t1_j7zb6rn wrote

thank you for that. I get nervous contributing in this sub because we have a couple of really persistent trolls here that feel the need to pick and peck at everything... but I've been here over 30 years and frankly this Fulop generation needs a reality check about gentrification.

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ChissWiz t1_j847jb4 wrote

this forum is made up of over 90% ppl who moved to JC recently.

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HappyArtichoke7729 t1_j7n5pcc wrote

If nothing bad happens to the kids, then the behavior will continue and/or get worse.

So I don't have answers, but anything that doesn't involve that, isn't fixing the problem.

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hxc-ufoz t1_j7ndlme wrote

It's not his responsibility to teach someone else's kids how to behave. Only to carry on with his life and keep his partner safe.

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Neat-Cake4645 t1_j7o0x92 wrote

You guys must be new in town, this was an everyday occurrence in the 2000s and 90s in JC. Packs of teens going out and assaulting people for shits and giggles. Both of you are lucky it didn't end up worse, I can recall at least one such occurrence within the last decade where an older man was knocked out by a group of teens and he fell on one of those steel fence decorative spikes and died, some real final destination type ****. The biggest problem in JC was always the packs of teens going out to commit chaos.

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ReadenReply t1_j7qo69g wrote

The knock out game... sucker punching people was a thing for while in the 90s I remember

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Supremememepunk t1_j82qvif wrote

more than 3/4 of this sub are not from here, they don’t know what it was like

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LootFroop t1_j7ny0hf wrote

Once those punks started throwing stones, you should've called the police immediately. Chances are, you're not the only victim.

Also, since you're near the tunnel entrance, you should also try to attract the Port Authority cops too.

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imaluckyduckie t1_j7n846f wrote

Pull out your phone to call the police or use one of those blue Emergency kiosks. You never know how long they will engage so best to get help early.

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No_Pin1392 t1_j7nw7gk wrote

Op - rest assured these thugs are going to land in big trouble sooner rather than later…good on you for not engaging.

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Laraujo31 t1_j7phvo9 wrote

There isn't anything you could of done besides call the cops. It was you and your gf against 3 boys. At 15 and 16 they can do some damage. Next time it may be safer to just uber.

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damryx t1_j7pywkg wrote

i was at a mcdonalds in downtown jc a few years ago and had a teenage girl just start throwing fries at me randomly and laughing with her friends. i knew i couldnt really do anything. i just walked away, showing no emotion.

in my head tho i was pissed af. Nothing you could really do. even if you took your phone out and started recording them, to get it on video, that would have escalated the situation.

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bindrosis t1_j7nyqy9 wrote

Report them to the police. Try to give the best description you can. Did you see where they were going? Anyone call each other a name? Could have followed them from a distance maybe

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[deleted] t1_j7nzf8l wrote

Next time say “that’s not very nice” and “you’re fresh” in an Urkel voice, it will either scare them off or cause them to laugh hysterically while you make your escape.

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oldnewspaperguy2 t1_j7n9j9g wrote

When you say “behind Newport”, where are you talking about?

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fandagan t1_j7nbm8q wrote

In the title it says near the Holland Hotel and OP also says behind the Newport Mall. So basically 11th/12th and Marin Blvd.

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Puzzlekitt t1_j7ngfse wrote

Call the non emergency police number and let them know. Maybe they’ll drive by that area more, but who knows if they can really do anything.

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Wynnrose t1_j7qry1z wrote

Always pretend you can’t hear them/ don’t know English

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edgertor t1_j7vk8m6 wrote

curious if you both turning around and filming them with your cameras woulda done anything... (this is a question, not necessarily a suggestion)

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kczar18 t1_j7o9n9a wrote

“Hey, what’s your fucking problem?” could work next time

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Sheafeira t1_j7ndoiy wrote

Sounds like you should’ve bitched them out in return

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Lilmitten82 t1_j7nfcow wrote

Teenagers are ruthless. Nothing good would’ve came out of that.

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kczar18 t1_j7o9pkx wrote

Agreed, stand up for yourself and your woman.

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Supablue24 t1_j7nk867 wrote

I guess to better prepare start taking some sort of martial arts and maybe lift some weights so that when the next time comes, you can be the hero we all know you are deep down.

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Vertigo963 t1_j7nhf26 wrote

Better raise taxes to teach them better. I'm sure the perpetrators here are just a few tax dollars away from mastering advanced trigonometry.

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