Who are these people with candy asking for money??

Submitted by Kawaimo t3_xwopj1 in jerseycity

5 years ago, there was this person with a box of candies outside of school. Oftentimes, they would call out to people, shake their hand, and say that they are either with the some unknown school trying to raise money for a basketball team or they need money for their 'daughters uniform' in exchange for candy.

I also saw some people do the same thing at the newport centre mall.

Some time at my university someone tried to do the same thing. It was like it was a script.

I typically ignore these, and yeah, maybe I was stupid for letting my curiosity get the better of me. So I decided to give him money. Like, three dollars to show that I'm sort of with him. And yeah, I know, that was not the smartest idea. I was going to ask him some questions after, but then he told me he needed change because I gave him three dollars. So, I just gave him some pocket change and told him not to worry about it.

Then he tells me if I could walk across the street with him to go to the bank so he could get change for me. Since there were a lot of people, and it didn't seem the likeliest that he would attack me (that question in of itself is suspicious), I decided that I would go the bank with him. He asked me some questions to be buddybuddy with me, and honestly if that isn't obviously suspicious i don't know what is.

Then, we enter the bank and I notice that he wanted me to go in first. Then I tell him to go first, and then he tells me that he needs a card to enter the bank, and then he realizes that you don't need a card.

We enter the bank, and then as soon as we enter I step aside to let him use the ATM. He then tells me to use MY card so he could get change for his daughter's uniform. But, wait a minute, I thought he was trying to get change from the bank, and I was going with him to get the change?

And THEN, he tells me that he didn't know how to use the atm because I was smart?

I then tried to explain to him that I didn't have a card. I tried to explain that I didn't even have a bank account that is connected to a card because I don't even have an ID.

He insisted on me putting MY card in the ATM. Then he tells me that I was "tricking him", while I was just asking questions because he kept telling me to use my card that honestly didn't even exist.

All I did was ask a question, trying to understand what was the underlying issue. He couldn't answer it. He was also getting mad, up in my face and frustrated because apparently I was wasting his time. The last question I asked, was "How do you know?" in response to his accusations that I was tricking him with questions. He then says "fuck this shit" and shows his true colors.

I get the sense that I was being gaslit here. But honestly, who the fuck are these people? I get the sense that they are trying to guilt-trip people by gaslighting them and taking their money, but I can't know that for sure. I'm positive you've seen these people at some point. I'm obviously going to ignore these people the next time.

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Wildwilly54 t1_ir7wy4o wrote

It’s just a hustle. They get candy bars or fruit snacks wholesale for say $0.25-0.40 and then sell it for $1-2. No different then people selling water bottles for a dollar or the shopping cart pretzel man. It’s been going on for probably 20+ years at this point.

But mannn you’re gullible for following the guy into the bank vestibule.

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[deleted] t1_irae934 wrote

Innocent hustle with a side of opportunistic robbery?

I don't doubt most people doing this are just as you described wholesale to retail. But clearly this particular individual had an insidious ulterior motive.

Still, OP shouldn't have engaged in the first place. I don't even acknowledge people when they're selling candy and drinks in the train or on the street. Multiple times I've been hassled to buy more than I wanted. They see I have more cash on me and continue to hover. No, thanks.

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possums101 t1_ir8354l wrote

I don’t understand why you were so invested in such an innocuous thing??? Most people just buy the candy and move on with their day if they even acknowledge the people at all. Congrats on discovering scams. What you did was not smart at all. Perfect example of how not to have street smarts. Are you from Iowa or something? Lmao

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WooliesWhiteLeg t1_ir9nepa wrote

What’s the scam? Generally you give them a dollar and they give you candy.

By that definition I totally got scammed when some company took my money and sent me a bunch of computer parts I ordered

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possums101 t1_ir9otan wrote

Well they’re not actually selling candy for whatever cause they say they are. Which I don’t personally care about. I buy candy from people like this all the time. Although it looks like the person OP ran into had other plans.

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WooliesWhiteLeg t1_ir9pa87 wrote

Sure, they aren’t selling for the cause they stated but you still give them money and they provide the promised service ( candy). I’m not trying to be intentionally difficult, I just don’t get how that could be considered a scam.

But yeah, OP is crazy for going anywhere, especially a bank, with a stranger. I agree completely

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possums101 t1_ir9pcd0 wrote

Because they’re lying

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WooliesWhiteLeg t1_ir9pixl wrote

Sure but a lie doesn’t make a scam.

CVS takes donations for charity but they don’t tell you that you’re just subsidizing their tax write off. That isn’t a scam

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Quarthex t1_ir9yd3e wrote

It isn't true that retailers take a tax write off when you donate at the register. The money you donate is a direct donation with no strings attached. You yourself are allowed to itemize it as a donation when you do your taxes.

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It is 100% a scam to tell someone you are raising money for a charitable cause when you aren't. You got a candy bar, but you believed your money was going to a charitable cause when actually it was not. You likely would not have bought the candy bar had you not been lied to about the money going to a charitable cause. If that isn't a scam, I don't know what is.

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Kawaimo OP t1_ir83w9w wrote

Yeah.. I know.. You're absolutely right, just looking back on it. Forgive me, I have autism and ADHD. I tend to be curious and have a slip of the mind. I had this idea of trying to get life experience, and so hell, I made a stupid decision. I was depressed for a couple of years and missed a lot of high school.

I suppose at least I have a story to tell my friends, and yeah... that was a moment.... maybe I should learn from other people who are street smart, it's probably a safer alternative to, well... experiencing things foolishly?

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joejoeaz t1_ira7ub1 wrote

I think you made a series of small decisions that turned out put you in an unsafe situation. Please stop beating yourself up over it.

You stated you're autistic and have ADHD. Neurodivergence issues like Autism, make you an easier a target for people with ill intent. I am not sure if you have an occupational therapist you work with, but possibly asking them about developing a toolset for avoiding exploitation like this might be a good idea, if such training is available.

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If there is any way to learn from the mistake(s), try to take what you can learn. Most people rely on "gut instinct" to avoid situations like this, and autism means you might not have a very developed sense of "gut instinct". Learning the red flags to look for, and having actual "if you see this, get out" type of information would probably be more helpful to you, than expecting you to take a full read on the situation, and trying to figure out if something doesn't seem right.

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I think you have an amazing attitude about the whole thing, writing it off as a story to tell your friends.

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In doing a little bit of quick googling, I found a book called "No More Victims: Protecting Those with Autism from Cyber Bullying, Internet Predators, and Scams" Which looks like it may be appropriate for its content, but you also mentioned having ADHD, which could make a book a bit of a challenge.

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I found this youtube video, which isn't exactly the right topic, but is "adjacent" to it. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LYCJ9pvQJhA&ab_channel=AutismFromTheInside

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joejoeaz t1_iraqbe2 wrote

I just watched that video I linked, and it's not really related, although you might find it an interesting channel :)

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WarrenBuffetsDriver t1_ir7wlyy wrote

There's no school association. Guys buy candy from BJ's using a shared membership and some of these guys still selling candy for their basketball team at "St. Anthony's" (which closed like a decade ago) are in their 30's.

No idea why you gave him a penny, let alone get dragged so hard here.

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Kawaimo OP t1_ir826wr wrote

You are right, forgive me.. This really was a risky mistake that I took on my part. I have autism and ADHD, and I have a tendency to be curious, have a slip of the mind, and make irrational decisions on the whim.. But I also want to experience the world, but this.. Looking back, this was a really bad idea and I should avoid situations like this in the future..

Well on the bright side, at least I have a crazy story to come back with, and know how this whole operation came to be.

Thank you for the response! I'll try to stay safe when commuting next time..

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mooseLimbsCatLicks t1_ir82j5a wrote

Yea be careful. In general don’t go anywhere with strangers who are asking for money or saying they will give you money. Just tell people who try to sell you things on the street no thank you.

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KenseiSport t1_irauru4 wrote

I know your just using it as an example but It’s only been 5 years since St. Anthony’s closed.

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Reeks_Geeks t1_ir9vbtl wrote

They could have pushed you aside as soon as you put in your bank card and pin. Then they have access to withdraw a ton of money before running away. NEVER LET A SUSPICIOUS STRANGER NEAR YOU AT THE ATM.

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keepseeing444 t1_ir7xe4r wrote

They’re hustlers going after suckers. Don’t fall for that trick. You’re lucky you didn’t get robbed. Pretend you just received an urgent phone call and walk away.

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Kawaimo OP t1_ir82zd4 wrote

Thanks for the advice! Forgive me, I have autism and ADHD, and I honestly have a slip of the mind and do things that are a little risky. Looking back on it, I probably should've kept myself safe. These things aren't really worth my life or my money. I guess that's what they mean when they say, "curiosity killed the cat", huh?

Anyways, I appreciate the constructive feedback. I often forget that the world isn't THAT safe of a place, and sometimes, my head is in the clouds. At least I know have a learned experience

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WooliesWhiteLeg t1_ir9n8yi wrote

Selling candy in exchange for money isnt a scam. It’s just capitalism

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Blecher_onthe_Hudson t1_irc88oy wrote

As part of a charity ask it most definitely is a scam, as you would make sales to people who would not ordinarily be looking to buy candy, but are motivated to support "the cause". No different than demanding money after an unasked for PATH performance.

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WooliesWhiteLeg t1_ircada7 wrote

Busking for cash after performing is also not a scam, wtf.

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Blecher_onthe_Hudson t1_ircb8k6 wrote

My son busks, he sits and plays guitar at open air market or such and people toss money in his case if they feel like it, or they can continue walking. Far different than forcing a performance on people riding a train who cannot leave, and then hovering intimidatingly in people's faces asking for money. Worse is the fucking acrobats who put you in fear for you face.

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WooliesWhiteLeg t1_ircemfr wrote

In 30 years of riding the NYC subway, I’ve never been “intimidated” into giving money to any “SHOWTIME” kids nor seen anyone else be. I feel like I’ve just come over from a different dimension lol. Are you all living in Mad Max and I’ve just not noticed the uptick of leather shoulder pads?!

Whether it’s showtime in the subway or that guy that plays the guitar on the path, I’ve only ever been forced to ignore them and turn up my podcast a little at worst.

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Blecher_onthe_Hudson t1_ircjhxg wrote

I've never given them a cent either, but obviously some people like the OP don't have the 'urban armor' we do.

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Image_Pristine t1_ir9gqe7 wrote

These guys especially the ones that are mostly at Newport are quite aggressive. There were multiple occasions where I have been aggressively grabbed by them and followed even into the mall. There has even been times where I was with my significant other and they would spark a conversation with them and start insulting/hit on me right in front of them. These guys are the reason why I avoided going to the mall, I also used to work in the mall but I’m glad I don’t anymore because they would even go into the stores bothering employees and customers.

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icunspall t1_irboewn wrote

Honestly, unbelievable that you went inside the bank with him

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Neither-Cherry5884 t1_ir7ywbi wrote

Another current common scam is them asking you to pay for the candy via Venmo or CashApp. Once you hand over your phone and allow them to do it you’ll see hundreds of dollars 💸 sent to their account.

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possums101 t1_ir837gz wrote

What kind of idiot falls for this? You don’t need to give someone your phone to use those apps.

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VanWorst t1_ir8bpbf wrote

Did you get the candy though?

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Rube777 t1_ira9koa wrote

You’re overthinking this, and parts of your story don’t add up

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HolyShonks t1_ir8kfht wrote

Never, ever ever take out money in front of a stranger. What you experienced was an elaborate mugging, only stopped because you didn't actually have the bank card.

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Backupaccount3 t1_ir9uu2j wrote

My immediate reaction is to call you a fool for going with somone you don't know to a secondary location, especially a bank. But I guess not everyone grew up or was around the same environment and seeing this type of street sale isn't normal for everyone

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BrilliantCabinet8 t1_irb0jci wrote

I would disagree with most of the people on the group who terms these kids as hustler.Sure they buy candies for $0.25 or so and sell them for a $1.But these kids are from poor background and are trying to make some money. I often buy some candies just to help them make quick buck. They are better than any homeless and putting some effort.

Many of them may use money for recreational drugs which is ethically wrong, and I don't support it but many of them may even be needy.

All I am saying is to help the kids by making them earn some money and have small sense of enjoyment.

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keepseeing444 t1_ircfnke wrote

No I will not help these kids. There is labor shortage in retail and food sectors, if they want to earn money they can find a proper job. Please don’t assume they’re all needy. Opportunistic maybe, definitely not needy. What they’re doing is unethical, illegal and is a public nuisance. The aggressive, bullying technique used by many of them feels like a mugging.

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Supablue24 t1_ircxey8 wrote

I feel the same way when I get bombarded by the kids selling girl scout cookies. Next time I’ll tell them to get a real job at McDonalds.

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LootFroop t1_ircafzw wrote

I remember those dudes from Newport Mall like almost 10 years ago, and gullible 15 year old me felt for it.

I gave the guy $10, thinking he was gonna gave me change. Nope, gave me this whole box of chocolate bars and ran off.

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datatadata t1_irayaht wrote

Dude just say no (or just ignore) and move on with your life

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HappyArtichoke7729 t1_ir8g4uz wrote

They want drug money. Everything they say is a lie, designed to get you to give them drug money.

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