what's wrong with the vibe of your building? i think honestly a lot of your problem is moving w/o prior research and maintaining high expectations when everything is a compromise

if you lived in nyc you would be doing the same things at higher costs, parking would be even more annoying and expensive, etc..

going to nyc is incredibly easy and you get used to the commute. try to meetup with people in the city (bc they def will not go into jersey lol)