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Friendly_Listen6216 OP t1_iup46uy wrote

Reply to comment by kittyglitther in Scary experience with a homeless man asking for money in Newport mall. by Friendly_Listen6216

Hindsight is 20/20. 9 times out of 10 this would have worked considering most people giving money to homeless people don't have this happen to them. Plus, I already said no and at this point he was following me, so I don't think it made a difference whether or not I offered him $2. It feels like you didn't read my entire post. I only went with that option as a last resort because I was scared.

Also, I'm new to Reddit so I didn't post this because of the post you're referring to.

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upnflames t1_iup8irf wrote

You should never give money to homeless people.

This touches close to home for me. My cousin whom I was close with was a homeless alcoholic (I was young 10-12, he was late 20's). He had a ton of issues and had gotten kicked out of my aunt's house for using and stealing and shit like that. He got clean and moved back in for a year or two, but she kicked him out after he started drinking heavily again. A month or two later, he was found frozen to death behind an Acme with a bottle. Drank himself unconscious and froze to death.

Obviously no way to know this for sure, but we know he begged for booze money and I can't help but think of the person who gave him the dollar he needed to buy the bottle that killed him. They probably thought they were helping. If you want to make a difference, keep track of whenever someone asks you for a buck or two and donate that money at the end of the year to a food pantry.

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Acrobatic-Season-770 t1_iupfeil wrote

I am so sorry for your loss. That is quite an unfortunate circumstance but not giving homeless people to use or things like food, essentials etc isn't really a solution either? And advocating to never give money to a homeless person is not a hard and fast rule for me. Honestly. Once in I've given that money away it is unconditional - I don't have a say as to how it is used. What if no one gave money and the person became desperate and tried to steal it from the store and got shot by a store owner or police instead? These scenarios are just as likely and also result in death.

Instead there are systemic issues that should be addressed like a like of support systems and access to affordable housing and safe shelters and substance abuse treatment centers including harm reduction places like safe injection sites.

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upnflames t1_iupqld1 wrote

Food and essentials are one thing, and it's true, in some cases, people asking may be needing money for items other than substances. But for me, it's a numbers game. Homelessness and home insecurity are enormous problems that are much broader than the population you see living on the streets. Those completely unsheltered folks tend to have deeper issues going on. A lot of it is mental illness, a lot of it is substance abuse. Money is very unlikely to help them. Again, not in every case. But certainly, in an uncomfortable majority.

>What if no one gave money and the person became desperate and tried to steal it from the store and got shot by a store owner or police instead? These scenarios are just as likely and also result in death.

I'm sorry, I just don't think this is true at all and greatly diminishes the number of people who OD on the street. There are a lot of resources available in the way of basic needs and homeless people know this. An addict will not spend money on food they know they can get from a public kitchen or food pantry. 100% of it goes to substances.

I understand that the donation is meant to be unconditional and non judgemental, but there is so much more benefit and reach in giving this money to good programs, for resources and even in support of the initiatives you mentioned. It goes so much farther and reduces the chance of harm. If you really want to give to an individual, consider care packages or some other gift as opposed to straight cash.

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IggySorcha t1_iuq453u wrote

If a homeless person wants to no longer be homeless, number one way to do so is to stop "looking" homeless. This means affording a gym membership to have a place to shower, and affording laundromat. Food and water come easy but you can't get clean without money, and without being clean it's hard to get allowed to sit in a coffee shop or library to stay warm/cool while you look for work or simply take shelter.

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JeromePowellAdmirer t1_iuutuzk wrote

Then it is what it is. I'm not going to take a dollar that could be used to save African children in extreme poverty (who are objectively in a much worse position than any American) and hand it to some random person. That would be akin to taking money out of the extreme poverty African's hands and giving it to an American who has access to 100x better resources

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dasuberblonde t1_iutckph wrote

I used to have a philosophy of not giving them money, but occasionally buying them food (if someone happened to ask on payday Fridays, I would always do it). I once bought a guy McDonalds. He then, right in front of my face, went back to the cashier and asked to return it for cash. Never bought them food or gave them a cent ever again.

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Friendly_Listen6216 OP t1_iupa04f wrote

Yeah, up until today, I never gave money to homeless people for exactly this reason.

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Dazzling-Research-38 t1_iup8dbs wrote

EVERYTIME you don't Want to be Bothered you SAY THIS "I Ain't GOT IT" or better Yet drop the $2 dollars in front of them and walk off

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HappyArtichoke7729 t1_iupv6h8 wrote

No, 9 times out of ten giving them money will make the situation worse. Either for you or them or others. But definitely worse, and often worse for you.

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