Submitted by 3peatguy95 t3_z8cozc in jerseycity

Im meeting a girl for the first time tomorrow for drinks, I’m looking for a bar that’s casual. I was thinking maybe a dive bar? Don’t know if that’ll be too casual for a 1st date but looking for suggestions

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moobycow t1_iyayvr8 wrote

Trick will be finding one you can actually hear each other in.

Anyway, the Pet Shop is actually not bad for casual drinks.

Iron Monkey has a bunch of different little places you can kind of tuck yourself away in.

Archers is far from a dive, but has a nice small bar and good cocktails.

O' Haras is a classic standard pub. Ed and Mary's is probably as friendly a place as you could possibly find, and you'll likely have 4 other interesting characters to talk with/listen to while there. I just talked myself into Ed and Mary's. Go there.

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thecrudest t1_iyaz49e wrote

Based on your comments, I'd suggest Wurstbar as a happy medium. Not as fancy as a Dullboy, but not as loud and divey as Key Hole/Pet Shop/Lucky 7.

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OddRedditNoun t1_iyb9u3e wrote

Nice lighting, great cider, warm and toasty, plus poutine to share!

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yayforhooray t1_iyaxy9s wrote

Pet shop is good.

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3peatguy95 OP t1_iyayilw wrote

Will we be able to have a conversation or is the music too loud?

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OldDevonBurgers t1_iyb3esh wrote

You should be fine on a weekday, there are booths and a couch in the back farther away from the bar, and there’s a whole outside space if it’s not too cold!

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coco_butter_biscuit t1_iybojp8 wrote

Don't go to pet shop, way too loud to have a conversation. Had to leave and go to a different bar with a group of friends because we literally couldn't hear each other talk

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EatMorePi t1_iybfeac wrote

I'd avoid Dullboy, the Archer, Barcade, if you want to be able to hear each other. I've gone on more than one date at Pet Shop and was able to have a conversation. Either the couch in the back, or downstairs at the wine bar, are the quieter spots.

A bar at a restaurant may be better for conversation, with respect to volume, ex: White Star? And then if things go well you can grab a more substantial dinner. No good for right now, but if you still need this info in the summertime then Smorgasbar is fantastic for this. (And then Dullboy becomes an option too, if, and only if, you can sit outside.)

I know it means I'm getting old but I really don't know what the point is of cranking the volume up so much people have to shout at each other. I go to bars when I want to just hang out and talk with whoever I'm with.

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moobycow t1_iyd5x3n wrote

Especially at 6pm on a Wednesday, or during F'n brunch. Hell, there are a few coffee spots that are uncomfortably loud.

I was in London recently and very few places were playing loud music when I went in, it was amazing.

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hippityhoppflop t1_iyb0eq0 wrote

Barcade is fun if you prefer to have some sort of activity involved

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moobycow t1_iyb490a wrote

Loud as fuck though. Really tough to carry on a conversation.

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hippityhoppflop t1_iyb6z6i wrote

That’s fair. But some people might prefer a casual activity based date so I figured it might be worth mentioning

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OddRedditNoun t1_iyb9pdo wrote

Yeah. I used to love Barcade but good god the last few times I’ve gone there I felt like I was in some weird torture chamber between the cacophonous music and random people screaming really loudly at games they don’t need to be yelling about. That’s the place you go to if the date is tanking so you can just LOUD yourself out of it 😂

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vocabularylessons t1_iyb6csl wrote

Pet Shop or Lucky 7 in Downtown.

LoFi or The Hutton in the Heights.

The bar area of the Archer (downtown) if you want cocktails. IMO more of a second date place if you get a booth.

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PixelSquish t1_iyb96r7 wrote

The Hutton and LoFi are my goto places in the Heights when I get lucky enough to match with someone local on the hellish dating apps. They are perfect for a first date.

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neonfight t1_iyayb3n wrote

Dullboy or the archer?

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3peatguy95 OP t1_iyayft9 wrote

I’ve been to dullboy and to me it wasn’t a casual bar, more of spot for a 2nd date

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neonfight t1_iyb4rs6 wrote

It has decent ambiance for a date but you’re right it’s not that casual.

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EatMorePi t1_iyedg7k wrote

Can you explain? Not saying you are wrong I’m just curious what people think makes a bar casual vs not. I’m used to only thinking about that word in terms of dress code.

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deaddabrain t1_iyayzrj wrote

If you want to go more casual than dull boy, try Petshop, Keyhole, or O’Haras.

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amyheming t1_iyazuro wrote

Iron Monkey and then you can stroll along the waterfront after drinks.

Edit: added waterfront stroll

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[deleted] t1_iyb0aj9 wrote

Ax throwing in the Heights. BYOB

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Unhappy_Spend_3535 t1_iyd6a94 wrote

Junto attic bar is classy, quiet (only allows parties up to 4 people), and only seats about 30 people. Great aesthetic, drinks aren’t expensive, and more off the beaten path. Highly recommend for a first date but beware is first come first serve with no reservations.

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lukasbarton t1_iydo7xf wrote

Drinks are $15 at Junto.

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doglywolf t1_iyeifew wrote

might as well go to the sky bar for the better views at those prices as long as the upstairs isnt in club mode yet its super chill

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seagull95 t1_iyb78j4 wrote

Pet Shop would be cute because they have booths, snacks, and board games

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peanut_buttergirl t1_iyce713 wrote

pet shop for sure. casual enough for a first date but not too divey. good selection of drinks and snacks

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Connect_Choice_3042 t1_iycqhrx wrote

Park tavern ! Even if it goes bad , you can het a great cheeseburger

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lbyron22 t1_iycuptc wrote

Not a dive bar, but went on a good amount of first dates at The Hutton in the Heights. Has a great intimate atmosphere. Good drinks too

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Y0990 t1_iyd48nt wrote

Lucky 7 is underrated. Their food is really good! drinks are fair. It’s not the most pretty establishment but it is great for sure.

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doglywolf t1_iyeikpp wrote

unless its an Alt chick or super super mellow girl not exactly the best first date spot for most. My type for sure ...but most probably not lol

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Y0990 t1_iyel0kx wrote

Agreed, if you’re trying to impress the lady then probably not the best place haha. Definitely a good spot to pregame or catch a game. I live with my gf and we have been together for 6 years so first date ideas have left my mind.

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RaptorEsquire t1_iydekpr wrote

Pet Shop and South House both have good date first date vibes.

Lucky 7s if she's into dive bars, but I wouldn't go there for a first date on a Friday or Saturday night.

The bar at Edward's if you're feeling classy, but you'll need to be early or late if you're going on the weekend.

I don't really dig the vibe at Archer or Dullboy for a first date. They're more second or third date places.

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EatMorePi t1_iyedrzk wrote

Could you explain what makes the vibes different and more second date like? I am just curious.

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RaptorEsquire t1_iyepoai wrote

Archer and Dullboy are a little darker, especially in winter. They feel a little more intimate to me than the other bars.

I mean, at the end of the day, your mileage may vary and it depends how you're feeling and how things are progressing. The best first date spot is the place where you feel most comfortable and can make a connection.

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doglywolf t1_iyei5xs wrote

Ed and Marys , White star (Hamilton one) .

Pet shop gets really crowded on weekend nights but if it is early Pet shop.

All nice low key and can talk .

Corgi is also both quite , fun and great vibe . No food but often have a food truck outside .

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BookOfMormont t1_iyeptq2 wrote

Ed & Mary's, over near Hamilton Park. It's a dive with a big beer menu, but unlike a lot of dives (I'm thinking of Lucky 7 and the like) they also have wine, cocktails, and a full bar, so if you don't know what your date likes it's a good option. They also have great, simple food if you get peckish. I almost hesitate to call it a dive because it's very clean and comfortable, but "dive" is pretty clearly the ambience they're aiming for.

Staff is awesome, and highly likely to make up for any gaps in conversation. The vibe is something like casually intelligent dirtbag leftist. I've seen a bartender cuss out an athlete on TV for sucking shit at the sports game that was on, then pivot and air his concerns about Universal Basic Income being a one-size-fits-all solution when it comes to minors, dependents, the mentally ill, and victims of domestic abuse.

If you're looking for something closer to the pedestrian boulevard and/or less casual, I'd say Hudson Hound. Not cheap, but if you're just getting drinks it's doable. Cocktails are unique and beautiful, the old wood and furnishings provide a real nice atmosphere, and again, great staff.

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JSM_77 t1_iyeq2pq wrote

Skinners loft also has a second floor and generally isn’t too crowded/loud

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AdorableStrategy t1_iyfelmt wrote

If you're looking downtown, maybe Light Horse Tavern? Elevated chill vibes.

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Potential_Ship5662 t1_iycoqw1 wrote

First date? You should skip that. Ask her father if you can marry her. Dating is overrated. There is a divorce lawyer close by, divorces only cost $399.

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