Boring 50s gay married couple here. I've lived in downtown JC for 16 years ... before that 18 years in Greenwich Village. I agree with all the posts recommending downtown JC for your needs and wants. It is walkable, non-car dependent, transit oriented, and personally I prefer NYC adjacent because at the end of the day, it's nice to leave the nonstop noise of the city behind and go home. And with your NJ licensing issue, NYC isn't a possibility.

My husband commutes 5 days a week to NYC on the Path. It's reliable and convenient, especially in rush hours when the trains are every few minutes. I'm in the city 2-3 times a week. Evenings and weekends are somewhat less convenient, but that doesn't stop us from going out in the city. Get the Path app and get to know the schedules for off hours and weekends. The ferry is a fun and fast alternative, especially if your destination is near the NYC waterfront (Tribeca, WTC, Financial District). But if you live near Grove Street, that might be a 20-minute walk to the JC waterfront to catch the ferry. Or a fast Citibike ride. (There's a Citibike bike share program here -- check out the Citibike app or site to see locations.)

Check out Subia's Cafe, Gaia & Loki, Salt & Seed, and like others have said, there are many more vegan options in JC or a short Path ride away in NYC.

The politics here are definitely more liberal than Florida, although the Democratic party machine, the nepotism, the self-dealing, and the developer money are extremely frustrating. I haven't heard about any book-banning here.

If you buy, be warned that property taxes are outrageously high.

Garden level apartments can be fantastic, especially having outdoor space in such proximity to the city. But the flood risk is real in certain neighborhoods, and not a problem at all in other neighborhoods. You'll want to check the specific address with the long-time residents here.

I'd suggest you get a one- or two-week short term rental in downtown JC and give it a trial run.