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ffejie t1_j3egfob wrote

I think the real question is: did you need to get out at midnight, or were you trying to leave very early the next morning? If neither of those is true, why not deal with it at 7a or 8a the next day?

Don't get me wrong, your neighbor sounds awful and absolutely took advantage of you and your driveway. The question is whether or not you could have waited for a more reasonable hour to address it. I'd be pretty pissed if someone came to my house after midnight and asked me to move my car, if I thought it was parked (semi)legally where we had agreed it'd be OK.

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Fox_Body_Barra t1_j3gmht6 wrote

You’d be upset if someone told you to move your car that you illegally parked in front of their driveway at an off hour? If you don’t like that, you should put your car where it doesn’t belong. This is 100% on the driver.

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ffejie t1_j3gojaj wrote

While we don't have the full story here, yes, I think I'd be upset if someone rang my doorbell after midnight to tell me to move my car. This appears to be an arrangement that has been fine in the past but OP decided tonight was the night it ends. Again, OP is free to do this, but is after midnight the best time to decide it?

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Fox_Body_Barra t1_j3gqn2w wrote

Sounds like OP was tired of being taken advantage of. The driver has no common courtesy, why should he receive any?

I would 100% ring their doorbell at midnight.

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ffejie t1_j3gqrx6 wrote

Yeah, with the full story (OP responded to my comment above), it's pretty obvious that the neighbor is a huge problem and owns all of the blame here. I would have done the same thing as OP.

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dehydratedsilica OP t1_j3fcd4u wrote

Did not need to get out at midnight, did leave 6a. Neighbor had arrived after midnight, I didn't get outside quick enough so texted within minutes, called, no response. Could it have been negotiated...possibly but was moot. Any sort of agreement was in the manner of I need you to ask first, but not having enforced that regularly, both sides get sloppy.

I left it out for brevity but the backstory includes multiple instances of having had to knock and wait after no phone response, also attempting skillful maneuvers around their car and other cars, not always successfully. Times with no problem might far outnumber times with problem, I wouldn't know. It was a different day (multiple) that I happen to have asked someone else to move just a few hours prior but regardless, would not have thought of preemptively communicating my schedule for using my driveway - like hey in case you were thinking of parking here tonight, please don't. It's been a long build-up, regrettably.

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ffejie t1_j3gp6jt wrote

With more context: your neighbor is horrible and fully at fault.

It sounds like the whole thing happened over the course of a few minutes. After midnight, at noon, who cares if the car has just been parked? It's unlikely you're waking someone up or severely inconveniencing them and you are the aggrieved party here so you have the right to get it resolved.

Also, you were leaving at 6a! I would much rather you knock on my door at 12:15a if I got in at 12a than knock on my door at 5:50a when you're trying to leave!

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dehydratedsilica OP t1_j3hwepd wrote

It was more like half hour because of waiting between texts and calls, not sure if waiting or not is less worse! I get that people aren't always tied to their phones. Or as you say, make a racket later, which I've had to do before, though not so early, which is the point, that I don't want to anymore. Did not tell neighbor preemptively because I hadn't seen them doing it, clearly we aren't on regular interacting terms for me to mention it out of the blue. They changed the "arrangement" to assuming it's fine rather than ask (my silence being complicit).

I suspect that in a separate conversation at another time, they still would have gone on, though maybe less explosively, about how I should be okay with them not doing it much when it doesn't usually inconvenience me anyway - exactly the kind of reasoning that works on a pushover.

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Fox_Body_Barra t1_j3gml8e wrote

You have no obligation to be considerate. It doesn’t matter when you’re leaving or if you’re leaving at all.

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HaleyBoysMom t1_j3gmmj3 wrote

Why don’t you park there instead of in ur driveway until you get the markings?

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dehydratedsilica OP t1_j3hxlti wrote

I bought the house intending to use the driveway as built (vs. using the parallel spot, which in this case was big enough but sometimes is not depending on how other people park) but definitely will consider in certain situations.

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