I had it wrong in how it works, and TheSkiGeek is right. It's an federal program that my wife employer has opted in. Works like an FSA. It's at least worth checking if its available, and if not ask for it to be.

Sarcasm aside, ever little bit does help, and I'll take anything I can find.

https://dpath.com/dependent-care-account-is-it-right-for-you/#:~:text=Annual%20contribution%20limits,of%20your%20paycheck%20before%20taxes.