You probably can't get off the grid. I have an efficient heat pump, and an $80,000 solar plus battery setup and that's not enough to be off grid in the winter when we don't get a lot of sunlight, but use the most electric due to heat. It would be possible with gas or oil heat, but not with a heat pump. If you want to be off grid, move south to Florida or Texas, it is possible there. Here, you'd need a windmill, probably 60 perfectly placed solar panels, and maybe 80+kwh of storage.

That also wouldn't be the most environmentally conscious because you will have way more solar and batteries than you need 8 or 9 months of the year, neither are environmentally friendly to build, and the excess is just waste if you aren't connected to the grid and selling your energy back to them.

The good news for your transformer, is if you are buying lots of solar and battery, and you remain connected to the grid (which I highly recommend), the grid may force you to buy a new transformer, so you will have fixed the issue for your neighbors.