Submitted by Thundahcaxzd t3_127q510 in movies

This is going to be a bit of a rant but I'll keep it short. I just rewatched the excellent, excellent movie Barb Wire last night, and I couldn't help but think to myself, what happened to movies like this? Some of you are going to think this is a shitpost but it's not. Barb Wire is a perfect movie. It executes what it sets out to do perfectly, there's not a single thing that I would change about the movie. Not a single scene that I would remove. It is exactly what I want out of an action movie: entertaining. I am here to be entertained. Is Pamela Anderson's performance completely 2-dimensional? Yes. Do I care? No, she's there to flash her tits and say the lines. I've never read the comics but I assume that her performance is actually incredibly faithful to them.

You've got boobies, you've got explosions (real explosions! And they are impressive), youve got gunfights, real stunts, real sets, goofy costumes, interesting side-characters, world-building, and a passable script. All of the actors play it straight and are well-cast character actors instead of just trying to jam as many big-name actors into the movie as possible.

I will never understand the trend of action movies that just want to be so bROodInG and gRiTtY and dark and ooh its just emotionless men killing people and they are so badass and the movie is tonally so flat and sERioUS and I'm gonna make an action movie but dont laugh or have a good time just say "ooh what a cool guy he is killing those people". Who fucking cares? Bourne movies suck, John Wick is mid at best, Daniel Craig is awesome but the daniel craig bond movies fucking suck (except casino royale). No Time to Die is fucking horrible, who goes to action movies to be sad????? wtf??!!?

  • MI and MI:2 are the best mission impossible movies
  • Roger Moore is the best era of Bond
  • Kingsman was an incredible breath of fresh air
  • action movies peaked in the 80s/90s and are worse now

If you actually think that Pamela Anderson's performance in Barb Wire is an impediment to enjoying the masterpiece that is Barb Wire then I am sorry but you do not understand action movies or why they are fun and enjoyable and you deserve your flat, milquetoast, boring action movies like The Gray Man.



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doc_55lk t1_jef8v2u wrote

Ah yes, our obligatory daily contrarian. I was wondering where you were.


charleyismyhero t1_jefc00w wrote

We are only allowed one a day, OP, and you used it up on Barb Wire.


Thundahcaxzd OP t1_jefdttm wrote

oh shit sorry for trying to discuss movies on the movies sub, my bad


charleyismyhero t1_jefhrz8 wrote

Don’t sweat it. Everybody falls for it at first.


Thundahcaxzd OP t1_jefi389 wrote

shit, is it too late to change the title of my post to, "Requiem for a Dream is a good movie but difficult watch"


charleyismyhero t1_jefj336 wrote

You just need a time out to think about what you’ve done, and after that you can come back and tell us all about how Apocalypse Now is underrated.


Onepunchmanworkout t1_jefa3ow wrote

>Some of you are going to think this is a shitpost

>You've got boobies,

Gee, why would we think that?


willrsauls t1_jegq9vj wrote

The moment I read that, I could basically infer everything there is to know about OP down to what their room probably smells like


Thundahcaxzd OP t1_jefdn02 wrote

are you gonna sit here with a straight face and pretend you dont like boobs?


Onepunchmanworkout t1_jefefxw wrote

Are you gonna sit here with a straight face and pretend this isn't a shitpost?


Thundahcaxzd OP t1_jefenwf wrote

define shitpost. everything I wrote was 10000% genuine.


brokenwolf t1_jegspp4 wrote

I don’t agree with your post but this made me lol


njdevils901 t1_jef9chv wrote

Okay, we don’t care, I think the John Wick movies are pretty overrated but people like them so I don’t give a shit. Stop complaining about what other people like, it is just embarrassing


ThatIowanGuy t1_jefbb2e wrote

>Barb Wire is a perfect movie. It executes what it sets out to do perfectly, there's not a single thing that I would change about the movie.

If this is your metric for a perfect movie than Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen is going to blow your mind.


Thundahcaxzd OP t1_jefeihp wrote

never seen it because I always viewed those movies as just CGI-fests but I would probably enjoy it more than Broody Gun Shooter Man 5000


gunter_grass t1_jef9tgf wrote

I think action movies have actually gotten better plot wise.


katril63 t1_jeft22r wrote

Claiming MI2 is one the best Mission Impossible movies tells me everything I need to know about your mental state.


brokenwolf t1_jegst9m wrote

This is the one that got me. If maverick got a best pic nomination then fallout should have as well.


Next-Mobile-9632 t1_jefe9h9 wrote

If you actually liked Barb Wire, you'll love the girl prison escape movies of the early 70's filmed in the Phillippines


dow366 t1_jegh0ig wrote

Quentin Tarantinos favorite films


foundyetii t1_jefsji2 wrote

I would argue that all 4 John wicks are wildly entertaining. I would say that style of movie is a “popcorn” moving. Hollywood still makes lots of those.


tempaccountinterval t1_jeg8ahv wrote

John Wick awesome. James Bond Craig Skyfall and Casino Royale awesome. Action movies from that era - Stallone, Arnold, Willis, Van Damme awesome also chuck norris. Bond movvies - Dalton best before Craig era. Action movies good ones still out - Top Gun 2 epic, Nobody was SO GOOD! BobOdenkirk ftw.


HowIsYourBreathing t1_jefa5pp wrote

If you like the 80's and 90's ones better, why not ask for suggestions?


alexxerth t1_jefcrsr wrote

There's a lotta movies out of Hong Kong and China that are stupid fun action movies. They tend to be somewhat comedic, but the actors play it straight it's just comedy from how ridiculous the events are.


Chen_Geller t1_jegnasg wrote

Oh, lord save us from such an awful thing as a serious movie…!


[deleted] t1_jegzcht wrote

There's plenty of shitty b grade straight to streaming action films made every year If that's what you're into.