Was Banshees of Inisherin the wrong choice for a friend that deals with the loss of a pet?

Submitted by derfiese123 t3_10p0qd4 in movies

Hey,

i'll be watching Banshees of Inisherin with a friend who lost her cat a few days ago, to distract her from it a bit. I expected it to be a comedy drama since the trailer had that vibe and everywhere it was labelled as that. But what I've read online today was that it's incredible sad and incredibly bleak and you pretty much won't leave the theater with a smile, apparently quite the opposite.

Now I think I've made a mistake with the choice of the movie and don't know what I should do. :(

What would you do? Should I cancel it, look for a different movie or ask her if something sad is alright for her?

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imminentmailing463 t1_j6hr0w3 wrote

Yeah, it's bleak. It's definitely not a comedy drama. It's a dark drama with some very black comedy in it. It's been very misadvertised.

Also, without wanting to give spoilers, I would say it's very specifically not appropriate for your friend.

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derfiese123 OP t1_j6hrbma wrote

yea, i've just seen the scene online, because i had to. i honestly expected it to be dark, similar to in bruges, but not too sad in any way. dang, i was looking forward to today. so best cancelling it?

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imminentmailing463 t1_j6hrqy6 wrote

The vibe is not dissimilar to In Bruges, but I'd say it's much bleaker. For me it's in that category of films that I thought were good, but I'll probably never watch again.

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Community_74 t1_j6ht2iw wrote

Not sure if it is bleaker, but i agree it's in the same category. If the idea of the movie night is to distract someone from loss, The Banshees of Inshireen is not going to help at all.

If they haven't seen Everything Everywhere all at once, i think that one would actually help for a few reasons. If you are ok watching a movie that didn't come out last year and want a comedy, there are a lot of options. I personally always enjoy watching the Big Sick or Little Miss Sunshine whenever I'm sad.

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TyrelUK t1_j6i9es0 wrote

Also Marcell the Shell with Shoes On

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Fantastic_Deer_3772 t1_j6hushr wrote

If there's another movie your friend might like, you can just say to her you realised it's not a comedy like you thought and would [other film] be better?

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derfiese123 OP t1_j6hwj29 wrote

yea, that's what i did. was thinking top gun: maverick? i just worry she still might insist on watching banshees because she knows i was looking forward for it.

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BrightPractical t1_j6is1w8 wrote

Can you just be direct about it? It’s really hard to tell what someone grieving needs. Sometimes it’s more grief, sometimes it’s cheer.

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grownduskier t1_j6i9sd6 wrote

It involves the death of a beloved pet, so I would avoid tbh

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ILikeMostCatss t1_j6ht635 wrote

Although its bleak overall, it did make me laugh a lot and didn't really leave me in a state of despair or anything. I recommend checking it out at some point.

Absolutely not the right timing for your friend though. The scene others have alluded to is pretty heart breaking and would almost certainly upset her.

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DemonicFluffyMog t1_j6i15i5 wrote

It's not a "chuckle at the Father Ted style wry Irish humour" comedy. It's a bleak "The moments of gallows humour serve to briefly, and artificially, raise your sensibility from total despair, only to allow it to be smashed down again, much in the way that a bare knuckle boxer might pick his downed opponent up by the hair, so that he can smash his skull back down into the canvas once again" kind of humour. If that sounds like it will cheer up your friend, then good luck.

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derfiese123 OP t1_j6i1o7m wrote

oh man, did they misadvertise it that bad or am i just an idiot? definitely should have checked sooner if it's an appropriate movie. thanks for making it clear!

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DemonicFluffyMog t1_j6i2aoa wrote

It's not your fault. It's funny in exactly the same way that the Irish Civil War is funny. And for the exact same reason (e.g. you need a deep black vein of humour at human unreason to laugh at it)

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mickeyflinn t1_j6i4r64 wrote

Yes it is completely the wrong choice. The movie starts out as a funny movie about some really quirky, sort of easy going people dealing with what seems a silly issue.

All of a sudden it goes really fucking dark and you realized how miserable they all really are.

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BigPoppaPuff t1_j6ia463 wrote

Studios don't know how to market film and make a misleading trailer, tale as old as time.

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Harryonthest t1_j6ib52a wrote

I saw it shortly after the loss of my pet, grandmother, and lover...it's my favorite film of 2022.

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DrRexMorman t1_j6icb4t wrote

Watch Waling Ned Devine instead.

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caroljg t1_j6in0al wrote

Watch CODA instead.

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WinkyNurdo t1_j6hwaav wrote

It’s a very black comedy. And really an allegory for the Irish civil war. It has none of the levity of, say, In Bruges, or even Three Billboards. If you’re trying to brighten the mood, this might not be the film you’re after!

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Community_74 t1_j6nv3js wrote

So what movie did you end up watching? Very curious to know what the right movie was!

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