I'll take the direct rude vs fake politeness any day of the week.

I definitely agree. It’s highly exaggerated. I can’t stand the passive aggressive bullshit that they pull down south and in the Midwest. I’ll take our directness any day of the week.

On the flip side, I don’t find Californians to be any “chiller” than we are.

NJ people just don't go out of their way to unnecessarily chat you up. No useless small talk. Everyone is busy, gainfully employed, on their way to something important. No one has the time to bullshit with you. This is not a bad thing. It's not rude. Everyone just has better things to do.

On the rare occasion, Jerseyites do decide to chat, it will be a worthwhile conversation, albeit brief.

Hi, midwesterner here who visited a few months ago. All of the people I interacted with seemed very open and authentically themselves. A far cry from the “How are you? I’m good. How are you?” of the Midwest. The interactions I had with people are one of the main reasons why I’d like to move there.

I think it’s exaggerated. We are just more direct and like to bust balls which I think people interpret as being mean. Sarcasm doesn’t always translate. People in the South can spend ten minutes talking about literally nothing.

Yup. If you ever notice all those crazy Karen videos on the internet featuring adults having public tantrums and melting down never happen in NJ. We’re all very nice here, we just don’t put up with bullshit.

Only by folk who think that being fake polite is better than honesty

Edit: I grew up in the midwest and the southeast. Those people would rather cut than look at you if you don't adhere to their narrow world-view. The way I look at it Jersey people are dead honest. We are crowded, we are over-everythinged. We don't have time for fake polite bullshit. We are the corridor state. That which moves to the northeast and from it moves through NJ. Be focused or fuck off. We don't get to have time for anything but efficiency.

That depends… are you asking this question from the left lane?

Doesn't matter that the rep is out of proportion. It's no exageration that introducing yourself as 'genuine' New Jersey often gets you negged in response. "Aren't you glad you're not there now?" Ad nauseum. The only solution I see is changing the state name to something blandly anonymous like North Delaware.

Maybe I just don't see it because I don't get out enough, but I've lived here pretty much my entire life and I don't feel like there's any actual universal "new jersey" personality traits

I'm from Oregon and to me people in NJ are more annoyed and generally upset and angry as a default mood, or maybe everyone is to some degree all over the country but It's more outwardly expressed in NJ than back in Oregon. Cashiers have no problem with showing attitude and straight showing that they hate their job, I mean, I don't blame them but it's not my fault. I am still nice to them.

Nah, having moved away, Jersey people live up to the reputation, but that's not necessarily a bad thing. It's just misunderstood and rude according to the cultural norms outside of the northeast. But there are definitely noticibly different cultural norms regarding politeness.

People hear the NJ accent and automatically assume rude people . It's worked in my favor before.

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please tell me where exactly you have seen someone let someone else in on the road here

I forget where I heard it- I don't know if it was a comedian or a random TikTok, but they described east coasters as not always nice, but always kind. Like we'll see someone with a flat tire and pull over to help them change it, but pick on them for not knowing. I thought that was more accurate than it should have been