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MoonPuma337 t1_j3jmwpg wrote

Did you ever consider Brian may have a significant other? And I don’t mean Brian May as in the lead guitarist for Queen I mean Brian perhaps might have a S/O which would make your gift less, gagg-y. Also he could be gay which would make it even worse if everyone at work knew he was gay except for you and you gave him that as a gag gift. On second thought if he’s not gay it would’ve actually been kinda funny if you gave a blow up sex doll that was a guy. Also one that does not murder. Gotta stop buying sex dolls from the dark web my man

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Equivalent_Ad_3482 OP t1_j3jo00e wrote

I've worked with Brian for the last couple years and hadn't ever heard anything about him seeing anyone, but admittedly, people at the office don't talk to me about much other than work. The murdering thing was accidental. I'll absolutely read the entire ad next time.

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MoonPuma337 t1_j3jwyxc wrote

Well no that’s kind of my point is you don’t know the people LIKE that you know? Guess what I’m trying to say is normal people bring a bottle of wine…..

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Equivalent_Ad_3482 OP t1_j3jxkxo wrote

I'll keep that in mind for the next event I'm invited to.

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MoonPuma337 t1_j3jxr2h wrote

You know, I wouldn’t exactly get my hopes up of that happening….not until you switch jobs anyways….

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Equivalent_Ad_3482 OP t1_j3jxxit wrote

I don't think anyone at the office knows about the unfortunate gift situation. There's still hope!

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MoonPuma337 t1_j3jybw0 wrote

Bro….someone dropped off a weird sex doll in Brian’s front door the night of his party that YOU were invited to yet never showed up and now Brian’s not showing up for work. Did you wipe your prints off the wrapping paper?

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Equivalent_Ad_3482 OP t1_j3jz4kp wrote

What I mean is, I highly doubt anyone knows about the doll period. We'll just have to see.

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MoonPuma337 t1_j3kipjq wrote

You dropped it off during a party!!! What do you mean no one knows???!?? A bunch of people saw Brian drag this thing in and open it and when forensics go to his house sometime later in the week and they start doing their CSI shit someone’s gonna be like “well there was this doll…” and CSI Guy will take off his sunglasses in a overly dramatic fashion while looking straight at the sun which is idiotic because that’s why you wear sunglasses and he’ll say in a sexy Miami Beach voice “what do you mean doll? There was no doll at the scene…” and that’s when shit hits the fan bruh. I have family in Mexico if you need some help….

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Equivalent_Ad_3482 OP t1_j3kj4mo wrote

While I originally planned to give Brian the doll at the party on Saturday, after she scared the shit out of me in the living room I decided I couldn't wait. I dropped the doll off at 11:45 PM on Friday instead. No one was on the street, I made sure of it. The only one who ever saw the doll was Brian and I highly suspect he isn't around to tell anyone anymore. Although a trip to Mexico does sound splendid!

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MoonPuma337 t1_j3jyg25 wrote

On the bright side the prison crowd seem like just the type of crowd that’s gonna love this story

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Efficient-Way-4664 t1_j3rgjpb wrote

Let's see, you drove with your own car to Brian's home just before he died. Oh no, the police would never suspect you. Especially not due to the way how you floored it on your way out.

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