He shall be executed for his terrible crimes

Clickbait title

>Following a brief investigation, Powelson was arrested and charged with battery on a person 65 or older.

To add insult to injury, and to add to the bizarre and especially Floridian take this article seems to embody, it ends with a Key Lime Pie recipe

He attacked someone, so he'll at least do time for battery

>As the man’s blood began to boil over the disrespect shown to his key lime pie, he confronted David, and the two became embroiled in a war of words over the final course. In his attempt to de-escalate things, Powelson tried to “cool off” his heated opponent by dumping two large glasses of water all over the pie-less victim.

>With that, the Lee County Sheriff’s Office was called, where the victim and Powelson each explained their side of the story, according to the arrest report. Following a brief investigation, Powelson was arrested and charged with battery on a person 65 or older.

Arrested for pouring water on someone over a pie lol

This sub has the best content even though i don’t frequent it

Sounds like a bit from Parks and Rec.

It really does

Unforgivable

If the headline was true, I woulda loved to see how some one could get arrested for eating a pie in the wrong way. Any ideas?

Needs to start with “Florida Man…”

They let ChatGPT write this article :D

Hahaha. I live in Lee County. We get so much crazy shit here.

..looking like whitey bulger

Is this whitey Bulger reincarnated

Pouring water on someone who is upset at him for eating THEIR pie.

Bah. I'm so sick of these crazy recipe sites that make you scroll through their life story before getting to the recipe.

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Not excusing what he did, of course, but why you would want to start an argument with Florida Man over key lime pie is beyond me...

Yell the n word between bites?

Depends. Was he eating the pie in a way that was disrespectful to someone else or to the pie? Because he best not be disrespecting the best pie there is!

You disrespect that pie in Key West, the locals will beat your ass to death with their walkers.

It is on my bucket list to have Key Lime pie from its home. I have had good pie, but I just know California doesn't do it justice.

He surrounded it with hair and used his tongue in the middle first

Lawyer here.

If you eat something while locking heavy eye contact and making suggestive faces, sounds and gestures, it could be characterized as sexual harassment.

When one tries to become the pie instead of consuming it

Key West is really unique in its own old people touristy kinda way. It is HOT AS FUCK, but feels like it's own country. The history is fascinating to seek out if you go looking for it. For some reason, beyond the pie, the iguana infestation is what most sticks in my memory from the visit though. They are absolutely everywhere all over the key. Roadkill lizards blanketing the roads. I'm pretty sure our tour guide said it was open season to exterminate them.

Nah, it's just Florida.

"He was eating his cookie at me!" - Bonnie Plunkett

Don't do the crime, if you can't do the lime.