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anythreewords t1_j9pnfja wrote

Well I guess we're never going to solve pollution now

189

Rickshmitt t1_j9qttsq wrote

Captain planet, hes our hero, gonna take pollution down to 7 inches

15

LilG1984 t1_j9t7t7y wrote

"You'll pay for this Captain Planet!!" Looten Plunder

3

UnfinishedProjects t1_j9u5y6h wrote

Now they're fucking the chemical pollution in an attempt to lengthen their penis! I've never seen anything like it, back to you Barbara.

1

StubbornAndCorrect t1_j9pyqfi wrote

SMALLER, YOU WERE SUPPOSED TO SAY SMALLER SO THE POLLUTION WOULD STOP

61

ThrowAway62378549 t1_j9sujpo wrote

I've seen a few studies which say smaller and on a global scale. But what do I know?

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Roblu3 t1_j9plsa2 wrote

Oh noo!! We should definitely get rid of all this pollution! Better put us somewhere safe like… my backyard or something…

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time4someredit t1_j9sjbwr wrote

I read that in the voice of the guy from the Simpsons who says “oh no”

2

Worried-Try-8141 t1_j9q0no9 wrote

Sperm count is lower so dicks have to go deeper to give the little guys a fighting chance

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Mista_Cash_Ew t1_j9r15bk wrote

So I get a bigger dick AND I save money on condoms? I'm sold!

20

nickkom t1_j9s8l75 wrote

Spray force could also be a factor

1

Nazamroth t1_j9sftxz wrote

If spray force is not enough to pin her to the ceiling, see a medical professional.

5

Milan__ t1_j9r1b27 wrote

This is what’s commonly referred to as rectum derived statistics, aka click bait bullshit

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bubba7557 t1_j9u93w7 wrote

Found the guy with the small dick that hates pollution! /s

2

iamsce t1_j9plk42 wrote

Warn????

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ionsawmill t1_j9pr82x wrote

My wife: "Honey, can you drink this pesticide?"

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PotPumper43 t1_j9pnez6 wrote

Apparently the Toxic Avenger is packing.

9

PM_ur_Rump t1_j9pt8uh wrote

He is, but still not as much as the Noxious Offender and his miracle of horrific Amortville science.

1

rugbat t1_j9pp2xd wrote

I'm gonna go suck on a car exhaust pipe...

7

Sinchanzo t1_j9prbiz wrote

Like radiation gives you superpowers?

7

Ahelex t1_j9qv5v6 wrote

Yes.

Radiation gave me the superpower to eject hair faster than the average person.

2

NoCommunication4350 t1_j9pyraw wrote

I feel like every "science" involving penis size is complete and utter bullshit. What great scientific minds would even be looking into that? It's so silly.

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Youareobscure t1_j9rjaqt wrote

There are a couple studies with good methodology on penis length, but not many. I would be suspicious of older studies since racism led at least some older studies to inflate the "measurements" for members of some races and deflate them for others. There are also a lot of studies that rely on self reporting which is also unreliable for obvious reasons. That's why I am only aware of two reputable studies. I'd take this particular meta analysis with more than just a grain of salt

5

[deleted] t1_j9rsc4e wrote

[removed]

1

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1

namedjughead t1_j9ptnmg wrote

I think we just found the silver lining

4

kangarooturd t1_j9py0qt wrote

Looks like those scientists went to great lengths to conduct their study,

3

Conscious-Coconut-16 t1_j9q4bv9 wrote

Where can I get some of this chemical pollution? (asking for a friend)

3

Autodr83 t1_j9r1fgf wrote

coughing man, I can't breathe today but look at this meat missile in my pants.

3

seremuyo t1_j9r8yza wrote

Pollution, it's got electrolytes!

3

Dasf1304 t1_j9q41k7 wrote

Wait those ads that said they had a pill that could make your dick longer are dumping product? We have to stop them

2

bubba7557 t1_j9u9iah wrote

The only kind of chemical dumping we can approve of...until you catch a small mouth bass hung like a horse

1

fireky2 t1_j9pujtn wrote

They just can't stop keeping me down

1

JD0x0 t1_j9qf7lj wrote

Also saw a claim Coke and Pepsi made your PP bigger today. Someone must really be going wild with their paid penis growing propaganda.

1

chaplar t1_j9qhox6 wrote

I must have been a little too early to this party...

1

[deleted] t1_j9qlvu9 wrote

Are these self-reported inches or real world inches

1

cofclabman t1_j9qnx93 wrote

I know Trump is a big Dick, but him going to Ohio for that train wreck shouldn’t have this kind of effect. Wrong kind of big Dick.

1

bubba7557 t1_j9u9tz7 wrote

Trump was seen desperately licking the ground around the crash site....

'it's not a mushroom it's not a mushroom... It's a giant portabella muthafucker!'

1

leperbacon t1_j9qsdlw wrote

Maybe they’re getting longer to make up for the length that’s lost with obesity, which is about half the US population

1

Bifferer t1_j9rfapf wrote

Yep, a three fold increase to make it past the three folds from his overhanging belly!

2

drmcsinister t1_j9qxbfh wrote

No wonder why Trump went to Ohio...

1

snoodletuber t1_j9qxm5l wrote

Where can we get the list and dosage?

1

yitdeedee t1_j9r0bwe wrote

Who's out here measuring dicks?

1

Siebje t1_j9r0tas wrote

What kind of pollution? Asking for a friend.

1

Michael074 t1_j9r9r1q wrote

wait does early puberty mean you have a larger penis?

1

[deleted] t1_j9rgeru wrote

yo dick so large, it looks like your moma bathed you in Clorox

1

Rocketman7171 t1_j9rpy16 wrote

“Doctor look at this Monster!!!”

Doctor: “yes, impressive…. You got stage four cancer.”

1

Imtypingthisnow t1_j9rycn0 wrote

Alex Jones said the chemicals were mutating the frogs and eliminating the need for perises ( or is it peni?)

1

Tigris_Morte t1_j9rydjo wrote

That rock over there could be increasing average penis length, scientists stated prior to banging penis with said rock.

1

Earnastus t1_j9s1r2p wrote

Ya see? THIS is what State Secrets acts are for.

1

Motivation42069 t1_j9s2xg4 wrote

Looks down* Hey there little buddy!! You hear that?

1

user72230 t1_j9s3e8t wrote

Hells yeah, I'm going to East Palestine Ohio!

1

closeafter t1_j9s7if6 wrote

Look up "silverlining" in the dicktionary

1

zippopopamus t1_j9s8uyl wrote

And they say pollution is bad

1

dasBergen t1_j9s9y0r wrote

I love could be headlines... It could be making penises bigger... It could be making parents choose the name Dwayne more often, it could be santa in drag blowing pixie dust into your butt hole, we don't know.

1

Darkhorseman81 t1_j9ss0e1 wrote

Last I checked non stick coatings were making them much smaller.

1

Darqnyz t1_j9ssbbw wrote

Are we gonna have the talk about black neighborhoods in the US taking the brunt of chemical pollution from neighboring factories?

1

ktElwood t1_j9svofb wrote

Is that why they lit the derailed train carrying chemicals on fire in Ohio?

"Inhale deeply boys, wee needs it"

1

deadpoolkool t1_j9tkhsc wrote

Some dude just read this, mad as hell and hung like a hamster, and he's about to go jump into a vat of toxic chemicals. Sad villain origins.

1

DWS223 t1_j9u32gj wrote

*scratches neck Dave Chapelle style*

You got any more of them pollutions?

1

bubba7557 t1_j9u8uuy wrote

Well, now we know why Harley Quinn can't let go of the Joker.

1

ChaoticRoar t1_j9t1sgx wrote

Time to increase pollution boys

0

TheBounceSpotter t1_j9pvjn2 wrote

Uhmmmm, no. Obviously this phenomenon is evolutionary. Changes in society over the last 100 years have increased the freedom of choice in partners, and the prevalence of pre-marital sex. These are allowing women to weed out most of the lower percentile of size from the pool of men who re-produce. In many cases, men who have come to realize they are well below average, will self select out of the dating pool altogether to avoid the rejection and shame they can expect to face.

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NoCommunication4350 t1_j9pywp3 wrote

Like the original article, this is also bullshit. All of this is baseless and designed to get anxiety clicks.

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barkbangquiet t1_j9q96n1 wrote

i seem to remember just about 2 years ago they said our dicks are getting smaller. now this.

3

Erich-Enrik t1_j9pzpul wrote

wait did you mean to say “anxiety clicks “or “horny chicks”?

1

Page-This t1_j9q75kr wrote

OR top quartile men who have more reproductive success potential realize their opportunity to have multiple partners without having a gaggle of squirts and are extra careful to keep it wrapped…thereby removing themselves from the gene pool. See? Bad logic works both ways…

4

TheBounceSpotter t1_j9qcoa1 wrote

I'm not sure the connection you are trying to make. You didn't address any of the points in my comment, instead stating a fact with an incorrect conclusion. Are the top men having more relations, yes. Do they have the opportunity to be more protected against pregnancy than previous generations, yes. Does them having more relations equal more chances to be sloppy and not fully utilize those protections in the heat of the moment. Also yes. It may not be possible to know the degree, but the general effects are easily modeled.

−1

Page-This t1_j9qqayj wrote

You’ve doubled down…but can you triple?

1

furiousfran t1_j9qau73 wrote

Sorry about your dick

1

TheBounceSpotter t1_j9qbn1p wrote

Interesting that you would assume taking an evolutionary perspective on changes in the population say's something negative about me personally.

0

ErectionDenier2024 t1_j9rcsfc wrote

This reeks of incel.

1

TheBounceSpotter t1_j9rm1uh wrote

I've made a statement of observation, not a judgement. That you interpret it as a judgement speaks more about you than I.

I neither condone, nor condemn, it is simply nature taking it's course. All of evolution has trade offs, gain the ability to walk, lose the ability to breath underwater. While we could argue the tradeoffs about societies current trends, I'll leave that to others.

−2