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Tahmas836 t1_ja88jgh wrote

*Funded by various soft drink companies

319

majorjoe23 t1_ja8y4cu wrote

Research by Dr. Pepper.

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heygreene t1_jaakumu wrote

The tiny lady from Married at First Sight?

2

Azozel t1_ja8b3kk wrote

The study was done on mice, not humans. Any claims this makes about humans is not backed by actual human data.

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stump2003 t1_ja9ci9l wrote

So forcing mice to drink Coke makes my junk bigger? Hope you’re thirsty Mr. Mouse…

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Azozel t1_ja9rtv6 wrote

Well, they claim it makes the mice have bigger testicles. They don't mention anything about the rest of the mouse. So, I guess you don't have to slam your balls in a microwave now so...

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_night_cat t1_ja9tps3 wrote

They’ve got the biggest balls of them all!

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J4MES101 t1_ja9lw93 wrote

Implying that somebody’s job for the last several months was measuring mouse cock length

Good cv material right there

(Kind of sounds like a trick played on an intern led to unexpected results. “Let’s make Dwayne measure their dicks”, etc etc.)

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StonedOldChiller t1_jaa6uxg wrote

"Dwayne's face was a picture when he was told he'd have to fluff them before measuring."

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Azozel t1_ja9rimt wrote

No, the article clearly says they measured the testicle size.

1

ok-jeweler-2950 t1_ja9lwk5 wrote

I drink way too much soda. My private parts might be bigger, but I can’t tell because of the size of my stomach.

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ash_274 t1_jaad4z2 wrote

Same thing with saccharine. It gives mice bladder cancer (when given in huge doses) but does NOT give humans bladder cancer.

Even California took it off their Prop 65 warning data, but France still bans saccharine from imports (officially)

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pm-me-your-nenen t1_ja8c7qp wrote

The study was done on mice, only comparing groups that drinks Coke, Pepsi and water. https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/36699165/

Yet actual data from human shows sugar sweetened beverage actually reduce testosterone level https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC6015465/

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Jacuul t1_ja8uvhc wrote

Yeah, was gonna say, maybe something in the soft drinks fucked up the mice, but drinking sugar/obesity/etc tend to have the exact opposite effect. This reeks of cherry-picked results, like that study about chocolate from a few years ago that it promotes weight loss (the study itself was part of a journalist outlet showing that studies can be gamed to show any result the people running it want)

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RepresentativeNo7660 t1_ja89den wrote

Can confirm, drink Coca Cola frequently-have a pretty big peen.

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draedek t1_ja8dffn wrote

same, I drink soda almost everyday. I am also not balding, so that other study is really true

3

InternetPeon t1_ja82fji wrote

What about Diet Coke?

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Dqueezy t1_ja8rhre wrote

Diet Coke? Diet Balls. Coke Zero? Zero Penis.

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Ultimate_Decoy t1_ja9oz0n wrote

I mean, you go on a diet to "lose" weight. You ain't gonna gain them size drinking zero calories!

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mike-godwin01 t1_ja8cu35 wrote

I must not have drank enough..

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houseman1131 t1_ja9dpti wrote

Yeah wtf were my parents thinking not letting me drink soda all the time this is their fault. 😡😡😡/s

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DaggyLive t1_ja8num4 wrote

Makes everything bigger tbh

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LewAshby309 t1_ja8nuq6 wrote

Then why is the avg penis size in the US smaller than in europe while europeans drink on avg roundabout 40% less soft drinks?

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977888 t1_ja9cxsn wrote

Probably because the U.S. has a much larger Asian population, and Asian countries, especially southeast, almost universally have the smallest by far

1

Consistent-Soil-1818 t1_jaaj5vy wrote

Now that we're talking stereotypes ... I think Americans also have a vastly larger fraction of people from African descent than Europe (maybe with the exception of France) ...

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SuitableNegotiation5 t1_ja8oy56 wrote

"Private parts"? Penis is not a dirty word.

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Ray_Pingeau t1_jaab0jj wrote

Except it’s not penis. It’s testicles. The oniony (not really) headline was made up.

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ctiger12 t1_ja97i2g wrote

Drinking or soaking? I need to know clearer

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Darklord_Bravo t1_jaa3x10 wrote

Pretty sure based on the amount of Dr. Pepper I consumed back in the 90's, my penis should be about 2 feet or longer right now.

Safe to say, it is not. Thankfully. (No diabetes either!)

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TaiDavis t1_ja8tdbq wrote

New study claims they're idiots

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RotjeCore t1_ja8expw wrote

It's called Penis or whatever you are referring to. Don't assume that everyone is five years old and can't handle those words. Btw, even five years old can handle them, they just use them for quite some time as soon as they learn that they get funny reactions from grown-ups, when using them.

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kre8ive1 t1_jaaduep wrote

But the article is about testicles, not penises. But you're right... just say what it is.

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Beepis2 t1_ja8tweo wrote

No, it doesn't. I drink soft drinks daily and I'm small af

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CyberCarnivore t1_ja9inpr wrote

Come on guys don't just read the headlines... 🤦‍♂️

The very first line in the article reads: "Drinking Coca-Cola makes men’s testicles bigger."

2 extra clicks before you comment about your dick size and we would all be making Bad Grandpa jokes, lol.

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[deleted] t1_ja8oduw wrote

[deleted]

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AndyGHK t1_ja98rhi wrote

When I was a lad I ate four dozen eggs every morning to help me get Large,

But now that I’m grown I eat five dozen eggs, so I’m roughly the size of a baaaarge!

3

CyberCarnivore t1_ja9i3ti wrote

"Drinking Coca-Cola makes men’s testicles bigger."

Literally the first line in the article...

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bjones0921 t1_ja90vx0 wrote

That’s a god damn lie.

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ElHijoDelCoco t1_ja92jiw wrote

I've got a dick like a cola-cola can. The only problem is I piss black.

2

BurnesWhenIP t1_ja97r9z wrote

I guess "Grab a Coke and a Smile" has new meaning

2

nilsgunderson t1_ja9hjqk wrote

Darn. I've been using that enlarge cream for ever and no results, despite rubbing it on religiously every night. I could have been drinking soda (and using the enlarge cream).

2

supreme_glassez t1_ja9il1h wrote

Bruh, if that's the case who knows how big I'd be if I drank soda!

2

VinylmationDude t1_ja9jpbw wrote

This is clearly bullshit as I haven’t seen any increase in penis size in my life.

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kre8ive1 t1_jaadneq wrote

Well that's because the article states it increases testicle size, not penis size. So what about those? 😂

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VinylmationDude t1_jab0d1m wrote

I can’t tell. It’s not like I take a ruler to them on the regular.

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blacknyourma t1_ja9l2m5 wrote

You can dissolve a mouse in Mountain Dew.

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Unique_Anywhere5735 t1_ja9ugsq wrote

Jeez! How many of these damned things do you have to drink? (Asking for a friend...)

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lsdecaria1 t1_ja9vk32 wrote

Brawndo. It has Viagra in it. Makes sense

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AGreenJacket t1_ja9vpyf wrote

As someone who has spent the last 20ish years of my life drinking several sodas a day, I can confirm this is incorrect

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Spellscroll t1_ja9wig4 wrote

Huh, never considered my waistline to be a private part before.

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janzeera t1_ja9xg30 wrote

“Coke Adds…,” inches.

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Soup0rMan t1_jaa08pe wrote

Mmm... Gonna say this one is doubtful. Not from personal experience of course. Nope.

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fromabuick t1_jaa2yos wrote

The greatest ad campaign ever born

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mindlessgonzo2 t1_jaa36uv wrote

Yeah, no. I already tried that.

Signed,

A Type-2 Diabetic

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msbeal2 t1_jaa6t3t wrote

Would that man part be their waste lines?

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ktp806 t1_jaac1hk wrote

Well played Pepsi, well played. Have a Coke and a smile.

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LouSanous t1_jaaf8xc wrote

Does it grow your dick faster than your gut? As long as it's visible, you're ok.

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mrgarbagepig t1_jaatvhg wrote

Private parts? Was this written by a 1st grade teacher??

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whitea44 t1_jaavgq6 wrote

Was it published by a joint committee of Coca Cola and Andrew Tate?

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ZY_Qing t1_jabsblx wrote

The sugar makes you fat and hides your peen

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purplerple t1_jacacfl wrote

Imagine having the job to measure mice peckers all day

2