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Loose_Consequence_26 t1_jbqhnnb wrote

Not well said at all. Just really doubled down on the double standard.

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Bender3455 t1_jbqjsek wrote

There's no double standard. I put the same standard on anyone: dress well and speak well.

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Loose_Consequence_26 t1_jbql19q wrote

The double standard comes from dressing well means conforming to things your hair isn’t capable of naturally.

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Bender3455 t1_jbqm3rc wrote

Ah, gotcha. I actually don't believe that to be true, personally, as far as what "dressing well" entails. Heck, when I was growing up, it felt like my thick hair only wanted to do one thing; look like a 70's porno commercial. Back on topic though, as a black man, there's certain styles that look more professional than other styles. Same with white men, or any other race. Fortunately, hair style is getting less 'taboo' and we can focus more on other outward justifiers. But, 20 years ago, the standards were more strict, and that was for everyone, including me.

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Loose_Consequence_26 t1_jbqnbbb wrote

So the problem with what you keep banging your head against is the definition of what is acceptable as a black man was not determined by black hair. It was a deliberate strategy to force you into a more white mold. And even the more strict requirements back in the day were often more strict for black people. Any job where hair length was an issue when your hair grows out rather then down often meant your were subjected to random definitions of to long was. Your manger changes and they declare your hair which was fine on Friday is now unkempt on Monday. HR wouldn’t back you. It’s why even today as you seem to think standards are less there os legislation being passed to protect said hairstyles.

What you want to believe isn’t backed by reality.

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Bender3455 t1_jbqq5dg wrote

What I believe is backed by a Master's Degree, 2 successful businesses, recognition as a local leader and advisor in the community, as well as my upbringing in a lower middle class family, going to school in an inner city magnet school, and my personal findings on how to create personal success.

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Loose_Consequence_26 t1_jbqqi4y wrote

All while not having to do it with black hair. And all the baggage that come with it.

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Bender3455 t1_jbqsy7y wrote

Every single person on the planet has their own struggles, their own battles, their own disadvantages to overcome. While I do not have black skin, I had to deal with my own struggles getting to where I am. I don't downplay other people's struggles, perhaps you should do the same.

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Loose_Consequence_26 t1_jbqt99s wrote

Maybe you should take your own words to heart. This whole time your downplaying Colin’s struggles.

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Bender3455 t1_jbqwcct wrote

Colin had his own set of struggles, but he doesn't get to blame his parents for them, not for what he mentioned at least. He's been way more privileged than either me or you.

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Loose_Consequence_26 t1_jbqwxgw wrote

He doesn’t get to state the struggles directly caused by his parents actions? In what way does that make sense? Just because he’s had more opportunities doesn’t mean they haven’t come with their own set of additional struggles. I can speak up against police brutality and frankly no one gives a damn. Man made his own demonstration and got vilified. Not sure I want his opportunities despite our somewhat similar struggles in early life.

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monogreenforthewin t1_jcfggn4 wrote

> state the struggles directly caused by his parents actions

lol bro you have a weird sense of struggle. parents telling their kids to get a haircut and dress better is a just parent thing. Kap didn't grow up poor, unloved or uneducated. If i tried to rock a Mohawk, my mom and dad would also give me shit and tell me to get a haircut. that's not struggle or oppression that's parenting.

He wants to advocate for better pay, better education and reductions in police violence for struggling black people or other minorities? cool im all for it. but calling his parents racist because they told him to get a haircut is just ungrateful nonsense and detracts from actual important messages he could be working on

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ohnoshebettadont18 t1_jc3t4vo wrote

you're just not identifying your own racism.

explain why any hairstyle that's as profoundly bound to black and african culture as cornrows (a style dating back as far as 3000bc in the horn and west coasts of africa) is "unprofessional"

many of these standards of approval for sake of "professionalism" are just thinly cloaked racism.

it's a very standard hairstyle for black and african people. there's nothing "unprofesional" about it.

to say otherwise, let alone associating it with looking like a "thug," is absolutely racist.

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