Submitted by kreals t3_11s5e03 in nottheonion
Comments
habb t1_jcc6d68 wrote
they even have a stock portfolio that they use to gamble on the stock market with the tithing money
DIWhy-not t1_jcc8ag7 wrote
They have a $44 BILLION stock portfolio. That’s as much money in play as major hedge funds like Citadel.
clarkn0va t1_jccoowv wrote
If that's gambling, they must be the house.
habb t1_jce6xld wrote
why would ol' joseph smith trust his money with anyone else?
SelectiveSanity t1_jccr67w wrote
Oh, so they can afford that god awful stupid Salt Lake Pacific Pipeline idea.
70monocle t1_jccm6hx wrote
It's so they can build the first generational spacr ship and travel to Tau Ceti
Millenniauld t1_jcco7e2 wrote
I see you, Beratna.
F0lks_ t1_jccy0sj wrote
Tumang lik pashang !
putalotoftussinonit t1_jcc4icd wrote
They are all like that.
Elsecaller_17-5 t1_jccw6z8 wrote
The farms are nonprofits and provide food for those in need.
TerryCratchett t1_jcfkwmn wrote
Not all of them. They run an enormous for-profit farming and ranching operation. Check out AgReserves. Owned 100% by LDS church.
ninja_stelf t1_jccptad wrote
As 20,000 acre feet of water rights will no longer be diverted for agriculture, the Lake will benefit greatly.
luckydogtoo t1_jcdqyzm wrote
Tax free!
BayonetTrenchFighter t1_jcqhrmn wrote
Because they feed ALOT of people.
JordanT4 t1_jccbpjf wrote
The Church uses farmland, ranches, and other facilities to produce the aid we send out. It makes its own donations rather than rely on the good will of corporations giving when they feel like it.
I know many distrust the business activities of the Church, but it all stems from necessity. When we first became a church pretty much no one liked us so we had to make a life by ourselves. Especially when we exiled ourselves out to Utah and people would refuse to even sell to us prior to that. The Church has had to be self-reliant and the businesses it operates come from that tradition of self-reliance.
johnsnowforpresident t1_jccigzo wrote
There's a difference between self-sufficiency and becoming a megacorp. It may have started as a necessity, but now its just a tax dodge. Given that the LDS church basically runs Utah politics these days, it's pretty disingenuous to claim necessity at all at this point.
ClonedUser t1_jccj33e wrote
GMorristwn t1_jcf0nzh wrote
Doesn't help the church was founded by a grifter...
joestaff t1_jccc60f wrote
Everytime I read LDS church, I read it as LSD church, and I wonder what I'm missing out on.
DontLook_Weirdo t1_jccihpg wrote
Fuckin same
Key_Drag4777 t1_jcclp7k wrote
Every f'n time!!
DeaDGoDXIV t1_jcda4k5 wrote
I dunno, but we could ask Timothy Leary, I heard he knows a thing or two about that
Commercial_Board6680 t1_jcgaonw wrote
Not a religious believer by a long shot, but I would join the Church of LSD in a heartbeat.
[deleted] t1_jckdhpx wrote
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Few-School-3869 t1_jcbvevi wrote
Man, this corporation doesn't pay taxes AND they've been hoarding water?!
BayonetTrenchFighter t1_jcqhv2x wrote
They do pay taxes on their for profit businesses. I’m not defending them, but accuracy is important. They have a whole “financial side” apparently.
manorwomanhuman t1_jcbxzio wrote
Holy water ?
submit_a_text_post t1_jcc3x6g wrote
Omg that comment section for the original post. It’s just PR.
skoltroll t1_jcc9co7 wrote
Buncha people from heavy-GOP Utah patting themselves on the back for a tiny climate fix hoisted upon them under threat of becoming (more) uninhabitable.
submit_a_text_post t1_jccdjk6 wrote
Yeah and people are suckers for cheap PR. Although sometimes I wonder if those comments are even real.
bearsheperd t1_jcci7eg wrote
They should just pray for water.
vineyardmike t1_jcd5zne wrote
They did. The governor literally asked people to pray for rain last year.
https://governor.utah.gov/2021/06/02/gov-cox-invites-utahns-to-pray-for-rain-june-4-6/
Utah punches way above their weight on r/nottheonion
bearsheperd t1_jcd71gv wrote
And it didn’t work?! Huh must be gods will then
vineyardmike t1_jcd7nn7 wrote
Quote from a Utah state senator a couple of days ago. You can't make this stuff up.
“A couple of years ago, Governor Cox got soundly mocked by left-leaning liberal media for asking Utahns to come together in faith and prayer, no matter what their denomination or faith was, to pray for precipitation,” Henderson said.
“We’ve got a lot more to do, and there’s a lot more water that we need, but we are experiencing some potentially record-setting precipitation levels this winter. Thank you for your prayers, and I want to say thank you for sticking it to the liberal pundits,” Henderson told delegates.
In June of 2021, Cox called for a “weekend of prayer,” asking Utahns of all faiths to pray for rain to help rescue the state from the grip of a multi-year drought. Cox’s call for prayer as drought relief was ridiculed by several prominent media figures, including comedian John Oliver on his “Last Week Tonight” HBO program.
Henderson also reportedly delivered some version of her comments at Republican Party events in Weber and Cache Counties on Saturday.
bakerzdosen t1_jcd9wf4 wrote
Maybe?
I mean this article was posted 3 hours ago:
“Utah's snowpack is officially the highest it has ever been in the middle of March, in more than 40 years.”
More_Cowbell8 t1_jcepsdp wrote
LDS church is a goddamn cult. Hoarding billions upon billions of dollars. Concealing and allowing child & toddler rape to prosper under their watch, unofficially- wink, wink. Like every single other church, they only care about PR. All churches are really the house of the Abrahamic religions satan. It's crystal fucking clear religious institutions are a pedos wet dream & money making scam from day one.
thatweirdguyted t1_jchfts5 wrote
I don't think it's the intention to have them from the get go. I think it's an unfortunate "ants a picnic" phenomenon. Like how house parties are great fun, but eventually you have to stop having them because inevitably some frat bro asshole fills the toilet with kitty litter (thanks again Lonny, you prick)
A churches main goal is blind, unquestioning obedience. Mainly for the purposes of profit,, but they'll swear it's for the Prophet. That is it's own scam in and of itself, it needs no further shenanigans. But it also takes a real amoral, narcissistic asshole to make a career out of duping ignorant saps full time. So it's not like they'd let morality or even legality get in the way of fucking the congregation, financially or physically. They probably dont see much of a difference.
The church can't really purge themselves of this kind of person without shutting down most of the rest of the scam. And there's too much money in it to just walk away. So they do what they can to cover it up and use PR to make it seem like they're not just letting it all continue.
More_Cowbell8 t1_jchl0ju wrote
It was from the get-go actually. The moment the church realized the $$ possibilities, they killed off the gnostic, & the institution was born.
restore_democracy t1_jcc9qhn wrote
Maybe they can dump a bottle of Trump Water in there while they’re at it.
kmbllmrtnsn t1_jcrzlcb wrote
Mormons, despite being overwhelmingly conservative, voted for trump is much smaller numbers than evangelicals.
I’m not Mormon but just stating 🤷♂️
Hsensei t1_jcd4jaf wrote
It's to late, they are not even delaying the inevitable
LarYungmann t1_jcdjtml wrote
So... Do they have like a horde of water sitting around somewhere like government cheese?
[deleted] t1_jcf7txc wrote
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Iamonte t1_jccna3h wrote
After the donation, many water shares does the church still own?
baeb66 t1_jcbxf7z wrote
Why is the LDS church running farms in the first place? That whole organization is just one giant corporation masquerading as a religious institution.