I hope you tell your boyfriend/fiance all of this and soon.

I hate to be the asshole, but if I were the partner of a person in this situation, I would strongly think twice before investing my future into this scenario.

As good and understanding of a person they might be, I see this causing arguments and strife in your future life.

There is absolutely no reason why you as a grown adult should still have your parents (or anybody except your life partner) on your bank account(s).

You said it yourself, your mom literally takes money from you without asking.

To me it sounds like you know the correct answer, but just want the masses to tell you that it is okay to remove them. And, I understand. That is okay. We all need that sometimes.

1,000,000 of people live on low income. You yourself said, they are not "poor" but not "well off." They need to learn how to budget and live within their means. 1,000,000 of people don't cook lavish meals for holidays. Your parents were accustom to a certain life style and now want you to support that lifestyle now that they cannot.

Believe me, I know first hand, it is hard to draw the line and not help your parents when they need it. But, unfortunately, no matter how good of people your parents may or may not be. It is very very easy for people to get accustom to and assume that their kid or uncle or whoever will bale them out when needed. I feel this has already happened since your mom now just takes the money and then tells/asks you. And, guilt tripping. Please. That speaks volumes. Why would a guilt trip even be necessary if the request was not legitimate.

What happens when you and your future partner want to buy a house or go on vacation or maybe one of your loose their job. What happens when you are in financial stress.

I am fine helping whoever needs help. In fact, I probably get taken advantage of way more than I like to admit. But, when the line of helping and assumption get crossed, I cannot help but feel I am now being used.

YMMV