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WingedBeagle t1_jefv2ik wrote

Is your girlfriend controlled by her father? Since you don’t mention her disagreeing with his “rule”, then she either values his opinion more than your relationship, or she’s afraid of not getting some kind of inheritance. You might want to rethink your plans.

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ta589962 t1_jefxs1e wrote

Also, she’s only 21 and “is getting a job”. She hasn’t even started her career yet. A lot of things could change between now and then. If you stay together then hopefully knowing her own mind is one of them.

That being said, does she/her father know the extent of your debts and salary? Because if so, especially as CEO, this guy knows marriage is off the table with his rule. And maybe that’s what he’s counting on—it’s a way to keep his daughter safe from marrying young while ensuring financial stability.

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Minionz t1_jefwe2q wrote

Sounds like your not getting married any time soon. Anyone expecting the other person to be debt free as part of marriage is going to be waiting a very long time. Where does she draw the line? If you had a mortgage on a house, that is debt. Just start making payments as you can and calculate the payoff period. Then come back to her and tell her you can get married in 5~ years.

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alexm2816 t1_jefwbd8 wrote

You have student loans > 1 years income and consumer debt > 2 years income. It's time to find a higher paying job if you can fear be damned.

I met a girl whose dad said he'd be rotting in the ground before he let her date a guy with long hair. Turns out a $14 trip to cost cutters didn't fix much and it was the kid under the hair he wasn't fond of...

Are you certain this has anything at all to do with debt and isn't just a dad posturing? If your future partner is beholden to her father you're not looking at a great outcome regardless of your next steps.

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Brilliant-Ad6443 t1_jefykt9 wrote

Im not sure he hasnt said this about me it was a rule for a sisters boyfriend, ill have to discuss further to see how its planned, ill also see if I can get a better job if possible thanks

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DextersQuest t1_jefwjmz wrote

I’d start by selling your car and buying something reasonable. Do the same for your mom. You can get a great used car for $12k. Get a 2014 subaru Outback or something.

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Brilliant-Ad6443 t1_jefyfte wrote

thanks ill sell my bmw and either get a bike or public transit or carpool for now

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DextersQuest t1_jefyy58 wrote

You asked for help and I took my time to give you advice. Enjoy drowning in debt you tool.

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