Are golf clubs as a security measure a Philadelphia thing?

Submitted by Republican_Wet_Dream t3_z21zpn in philadelphia

A couple of years ago, a friend (who is probably reading this and yes, let’s get holiday beers next week) left a golf club behind after house sitting, telling us it was a good thing to have around.

I hadn’t thought about it since then until hearing a lyric in Kenn Kweder’s “Places that “he keeps his golf clubs in the kitchen, in case there’s trouble in the bar”.

Does anyone keep a golf club around the house, just in case?

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Proper-Code7794 t1_ixe3yym wrote

Have a bat like a normal person

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FordMaverickFan t1_ixengy0 wrote

I was shocked when my cousins who lived in jersey told me they didn’t keep a bat near the front door.

Just figured they were mandatory as a kid

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WeJustDid46 t1_ixft3rg wrote

That’s because they don’t live in the City of Brotherly Love.

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boytoy421 t1_ixj3ujf wrote

Louisville slugger right next to the bed

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T-Bird19 t1_ixe634c wrote

I have a thrifted baseball bat for young kids, it’s the perfect size. It has some kids name written on it still and that’s what we call it, wherever you are xxxxx Hamm, I appreciate you.

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Turtle-power2021 t1_ixedshq wrote

Think close quarters. Can you swing it in your hallway? Get a mini bat or crow bar

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DangerousThanks t1_ixf6n1q wrote

This! Mini bars are great, smaller and lighter than a regular bat, if you miss it’s quicker to recover and swing again compared to a full size bat.

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HotSpinach t1_ixe7d0x wrote

Bats and golf clubs, children's versions, easy to swing hard. Had to be reminded that the golf club might just get stuck in someone's skull.

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The_Nauticus t1_ixebzj2 wrote

It's a bad situation when your golf club is stuck in a zombie's skull and there are 2 more coming after you.

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Baron_Von_D t1_ixem252 wrote

Golf clubs aren't that great for handling trouble. They can easily bend or break.
Best, as others suggested, is a bat or baton. I still have my oak bokken from when I used to practice Iaido. You can really do some damage with a strong bit of wood.
(that's what she said)

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Astartia t1_ixf1004 wrote

An extra large D-cell MagLite is a far, far better and more useful tool.

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Robert_A_Bouie t1_ixeu653 wrote

Go watch "Nobody" starring Bob Odenkirk. It features a scene with him using one in a home invasion robbery.

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No-Reporter3692 t1_ixeawt0 wrote

I’m an absolute golf fanatic so, yes. I have a 6 iron by my door and a pitching wedge next to the bed.

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SnapCrackleMom t1_ixeridf wrote

A golf club is too easy for someone to wrench away from you. A hammer is what you want to have handy. You don't need to be super strong for it to be effective, either.

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Fine_With_It_All t1_ixfnz4k wrote

I’m picturing myself going up against someone with a golf club or a hammer and I think my chances are better with the guy with hammer. Any dipshit can swing a golf club but can anyone be effective with a hammer… maybe not

These are the conversations that bring me to Reddit

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SnapCrackleMom t1_ixfoc4m wrote

I'm not particularly strong. I could absolutely do more damage with a hammer to the head than with a golf club.

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Fine_With_It_All t1_ixfoigx wrote

But that’s the thing, if you’re a weakling, a golf club is easier to swing

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joeheller22 t1_ixfesao wrote

Golf club is iffy. That first hit could cause the entire head to detach from the shaft.

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DippyMagee555 t1_ixilkgt wrote

>That first hit could cause the entire head to detach

Well yea that's what we're going for!

>head to detach from the shaft

No, no, no! Not what we're going for!

I'll keep my head attached to my shaft, tyvm

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Angsty_Potatos t1_ixftbwg wrote

I keep a length of rebar in my room for this purpose. I assume anything that is swing easily by the wielder and has some heft is effective

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maspie_den t1_ixhhqf0 wrote

I keep a crowbar under my driver's seat and an aluminum baseball bat on the passenger side. The last time I had the car inspected, the mechanic asked if I played baseball. Looked him dead in the eyes. "No." I think he got it.

The crowbar is great for when I'm standing at the gas pump, if needed. A crowbar says "crazy," and there's some protection that comes with that label. Don't approach me. Don't talk to me. I'm not the one. Solo female gotta take care of herself.

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jamin_g t1_ixeoghj wrote

I have a broken bong. "Clubber Lang"

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modest_irish_goddess t1_ixg219l wrote

Just wanted to say I love Kenn Kweder.

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Republican_Wet_Dream OP t1_ixguh4s wrote

Are you coming to the “secret” Peck millers show tonight? 8 pm at pecks, ridge and green in Roxborough.

No cover

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pollyauntie t1_ixhcjm5 wrote

I keep my old 4-iron by my bed, because I never miss with my 4-iron.

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AbsentEmpire t1_ixjgufr wrote

Golf club is too bendy, you want a bat, hammer , or hatchet.

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Raecino t1_ixfp3l2 wrote

Most people I know have guns in their house as a security measure.

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gnartato t1_ixe3hfv wrote

  1. They bend easy af
  2. It's can easily be used against you because;
  3. You need to come within range of someone physically hurting you to use it (we're talking home invasion defense here, not street self defence).

The best thing to keep around is one you fel confident using, know how to use, and most effectively eliminates the threat. Hate to say it but gun is the only thing that checkes these boxes for me and most people unless they are trained in hand to hand combat and they get training and practice.

That being said. Baseball bat over a golf club all day long.

Edit: my point is; missed me with letting someone get close enough to touch me if I can at all help it.

So is someomg going to downvote me for something other than the gun reference? Like, doyou have better ideas? Is everyone karate certified? Oh right, it's reddit where we downvote without suggesting alternatives.

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The_Nauticus t1_ixeccov wrote

I hear Shaolin spades are great for keeping your distance. 6-7' should be enough.

/s

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gnartato t1_ixep3nu wrote

Only when paired with a high capacity spade dispenser.

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