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Dudephish t1_j2dulsy wrote

Maybe he's just depressed. Have you considered he could be a bi-polar bear?

297

Bardez t1_j2e8zn3 wrote

Get the fuck out and take your upvote with you.

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AttentionSpanZero t1_j2dkv1h wrote

Call him Fat Albert to his face. Go ahead. Do it.

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meowinbox t1_j2e2amp wrote

HEY YOU! FAT ALBERT!

7

jordantask t1_j2epq8v wrote

No! Closer!

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meowinbox t1_j2fe3hz wrote

Yea good idea. Why don’t you go up to him a bit I wanna check his anggy range.

4

-maffu- t1_j2efr9s wrote

>...and he lives in a village named Kat.

And you're just going to leave it at that??

How does he live in a village?? Does he have a house? Does he have a postal address? Polar bears will actively hunt humans for food - is that how he came to live in a village, by eating all of the former inhabitants? Is that how he became so fat? Who named him 'Fat Albert'?? Is he in the Mafia? Is there a polar bear mafia? La Pola Nostra? La Cosa Ursa? Because it sounds like a mafia nickname. Poliatore 'Fat Albert' Bearoni. He's a stone cold killer. Perhaps it's a village of polar bears? Is that it? How did they weigh him and his fellow lard bears? Who weighed him? Was there a competition?

Where are you? Answer me! I have to know!

I HAVE TO KNOW!!

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MashTactics t1_j2f5kby wrote

>...and he lives in a village named Kat.
>
>And you're just going to leave it at that??

Well, it used to be Kit Kat, until he ate the first half.

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DarkLink1065 t1_j2fxl1q wrote

I mean, if you're a villager, and that dude shows up and makes a den next door, what are you really going to do about it?

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WittyWitWitt t1_j2drf7r wrote

He's eaten half the village by the looks of it.

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MonsieurReynard t1_j2eq2q5 wrote

The village is not called Kat. The village is called Kaktovik. Articles about this bear have misspelled it "Katovik," hence the shortened but incorrect name.

Kaktovik is an Iñupiaq village of around 300 inside the Alaska National Wildlife Refuge. I've been there. Lots of polar bears. Learn about it: https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Kaktovik,_Alaska

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aquoad t1_j2e9psz wrote

oh lawd, he comin’

9

isecore t1_j2dneoy wrote

Heckin' chonker.

8

Herge2020 t1_j2dpz39 wrote

It's either a Pizzly or one grubby polar bear.

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Chickentrap t1_j2dxkm2 wrote

Albert's cultivating mass

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APunnyThing t1_j2e1a0g wrote

More like the village of Kit-Kats

3

azducky t1_j2fa3hx wrote

Cat population - 0

3

MaxxB1ade t1_j2fkya8 wrote

I'm less afraid of him than the scrawny lookin ones that have just come out of hybernation.

2

Late_Again68 t1_j2e1rpz wrote

Q: What does Fat Albert eat?

A: Anything he wants

1

sky_shrimp t1_j2e62c9 wrote

Albert ate all the pies.

1

harosene t1_j2egdan wrote

O lawd he comin

1

Dyslexic_Dog25 t1_j2ehniz wrote

id watch a Hank the Tank Vs Fat Albert PPV.

1

sariaslani t1_j2ejtrw wrote

Who's the goodest boi?

1

Mrselfdestructuk t1_j2eka4x wrote

And Albert refers to everyone in Kat as "Cunt"

Villager " Hi Fat Albert"

Albert " Cunt"

1

icubud t1_j2eq5eq wrote

he is just husky!
a great healthy bear
looking up Kat, Alaska but not seeing that such a city exists ???

1

joemorl t1_j2evsah wrote

Feels weird seeing a polar bear on what looks like sand

1

SchrodieGalifrey t1_j2f9dcc wrote

If you're a polar bear, why aren't you white?

1

DFL85 t1_j2fu6wc wrote

Albert must be a good hunter

1

[deleted] t1_j2e4ejs wrote

[deleted]

0

psymunn t1_j2e4npm wrote

Dust and dirt by the looks of it

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_n1n0_ t1_j2ebc7k wrote

Maybe, but by the look of his head/skull, it looks a bit like grizzly too, so it might be that it is a result od a polar/grizzly breeding ( that thing happens).

2

Previous_Basil t1_j2ebdyw wrote

A fat polar bear is a happy polar bear. 😬

0

_n1n0_ t1_j2ebgds wrote

Is it a polar and a kodiak bear mix?

0