Welcome to /r/relationship_advice. Please make sure you read our rules here. We'd like to take this time to remind users that:

• We do not allow any type of am I the asshole? or situations/content involving minors

• Any sort of namecalling, insults,etc will result in the comment being removed and the user being banned. (Including but not limited to: slut, bitch, whore, for the streets, etc. It does not matter to whom you are referring.)

• ALL advice given must be good, ethical advice. Joke advice or advice that is conspiratorial or just plain terrible will be removed, and users my be subject to a ban.

• No referencing hateful subreddits and/or their rhetoric. Examples include, but is not limited to: red/blue/black/purplepill, PUA, FDS, MGTOW, etc. This includes, but is not limited to, referring to people as alpha/beta, calling yourself or users "friend-zoned", referring to people as Chads, Tyrones, or Staceys, pick-me's, or pornsick. Any infractions of this rule will result in a ban. This is not an all-inclusive list.

• All bans in this subreddit are permanent. You don't get a free pass.

• What we cannot give advice on: rants, unsolicited advice, medical conditions/advice, mental illness, letters to an ex, "body counts" or number of sexual partners, legal problems, financial problems, situations involving minors, and/or abuse (violence, sexual, emotional etc). All of these will be removed and locked. This is not an all-inclusive list.

If you have any questions, please send us a modmail.

#This is an automatic comment that appears on all posts. This comment does not necessarily mean your post violates any rules.

I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.

To me this would be cheating. Married 12 years monogamously.

Do you consider sexting cheating ?

[removed]

[removed]

[removed]

[removed]

It doesn’t matter what 10000 internet strangers think. If this is CHEATING TO YOU, then he cheated. Go from there.

How long has your SO been sexting? Have they put a lot of time/effort into hiding their activity from you? That would suggest they knew you would not be okay with it. Now that you’ve found out, have they invited you to sit in so that you can see how totally-not-cheating it is for them? I’m guessing that’s a “no.”

Some people feel that sexting doesn’t count as “real” sex, and that as long as they’re discreet and they never plan to meet the other person then there’s no harm done. Others strongly disagree. If you two haven’t previously discussed your opinions about things like sexting with an actual human on the other end, sexting with an AI, consuming pre-recorded porn etc, and you’re just now finding out that you’re not on the same page, you’re overdue to clear the air.

[removed]