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BraveAccident738 t1_jaf4yut wrote

You guys need to talk to one another. I understand splitting costs, but he must see and know the differences in your incomes and I think it is not very nice to put you in a difficult position. Can I ask why you don’t like to accept his generosity for the ski trip? I live in NE and skiing is super expensive. If it is his idea, why don’t you accept his gift to go and pay for you.

And I would have a hard time with my partner eating surf and turf and I was having a salad and counting my pennies for example. When I was dating and in a relationship, we didn’t keep count, we took turns, he gifted, I gifted. Have you guys always split everything and whose idea is it?

Being in a committed relationship is great but you both need to learn to share your combined wealth in participating in life together. You don’t need to feel ostracized due to money. I think you should feel more comfortable with accepting from him as your partner to treat you to dinner and go skiing if it is his ideal. You need to think that going forward as you make more you can return the favor. Why do you always need to split the bill?

He shouldn’t be calling you cheap, you are frugal. It is good to be frugal and he may need to learn better saving plans and you can help him. A partnership is sharing sometimes our money, our time, or our skills. Maybe come to a mutual decision that if he wants you to participate in expensive trips, etc than he needs to fund them and you need to be accepting of this. It’s good to find a common ground on a issue such as finances. You could also look into making a shared fund that both of you can contribute to for activities and dates, based the sharing on your income.

You need to resolve this issue prior to moving in together as in relations to shared expenses or this could become a continued issue in your relationship.

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