Submitted by Ok-Construction3928 t3_11eb71m in relationship_advice
I just went through my boyfriend’s text messages and found out that he cheated on his ex girlfriend of 6.5 years with another woman (not me). When his ex found out this was the heartbreaking text that she sent him:
“There is nothing you can say that will ever undo the fact that you have been in a long term relationship with someone else. Things you've been doing and how you've been acting now make sense. The lackluster, passionless sex you've been giving me even makes sense since you were putting all of your effort into someone else. Your disappearing for hours or an entire night makes sense. Your thinking you and I had a conversation when we didn't makes sense, you were confusing me with her. Even thinking I like Calvin and Hobbes makes sense. You do. I've told you it's not my taste. Is it hers? You finding a necklace in your apartment that isn't mine makes sense. You shoving the pictures of us in the frame I gave you into your closet makes sense. Your suddenly being motivated to keep your apartment cleaner makes sense. You never made that effort for me. It's clear what changed. Your careful word choices and being vague about being with "friends" makes sense. You going out to eat with "friends" all the time while telling me you're on a diet makes sense. You had been asking me about gemstones for an engagement ring and that suddenly stopped.
What was your end game here? What did you think would happen? That you'd keep going with her and I'd never know? That you could keep lying and I'd never notice? Or did you think it would end when we moved in together and you could seamlessly pick up our relationship and be in it 100%? Or did you think you'd tell me and I'd just forgive you and we'd move on?
You took 6.5 years of my life, my heart and half my soul and you tore it all to shreds. I don't know how I will ever be able to trust anyone again, but I know without a doubt that I will never trust you again.”
He met me just 3 months after this break up and we’ve been together for a year now. I’m literally shaking right now. If he could do this to his ex girlfriend, what would stop him from doing the same thing to me a few years down the road? I feel heartbroken for that poor woman that stood by him for so many years and he broke her heart in the most horrible way. At the same time I’m scared for my own future if I decide to stay with him. What should I do?
TLDR: Just found out that my boyfriend of 1 year cheated in his last relationship after they were together for almost 7 years.
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