Viewing a single comment thread. View all comments

dashakimova OP t1_jefxjs4 wrote

Reply to comment by UsuallyWrite2 in How to proceed with friendship (26/27f) after I (25f) was not made a bridesmaid? by dashakimova

I agree. I think the issue I’m having is this double standard of “we’re not close friends but I still want you to do all this stuff for me”. Like the bachelorette trip, being involved with asking how the planning is going, offering help, and showing up early on the day of the wedding to have a first look with her? Originally, she wanted me to not be a bridesmaid but still spend the whole day getting ready with her and the bridal party.

That’s what I was thinking but I know it’s a stark contrast to what I’m doing for Elizabeth and it’s gonna be awkward because we still run in the same circle. And the other girls expect me to act like one of them but not be one of them. It’s just odd.

3

UsuallyWrite2 t1_jefyct8 wrote

I was kind of in your shoes when I was I college. Here’s the thing…all of us ladies are still friends 20+ years later and not one of us thinks about weddings anymore as we all realized those are just snapshots in time and hell—most of them are divorced and remarried at this point.

Do what you want to do. Feel your feelings. I personally would not put in the same level of effort for Sarah as Elizabeth though.

4

dashakimova OP t1_jeg6x1a wrote

Thank you for your perspective, I’ll have to keep it in mind!

1

LongjumpingAgency245 t1_jegu8fg wrote

Don't put yourself out there. Less stress on you. The bridal party will do their part.

Have fun with the wedding you are involved with. It sounds like you will make it an amazing experience.

1