I (f19) am frustrated with my bf (m18) sexually

Submitted by ThrowRA223300 t3_127yryo in relationship_advice

We have been together for 6 years and he is my first. he has broken my trust, which probably plays a part in our issues, and I have only finished once in the relationship. When he initiates something, It feels more like something I have to do rather than something I want. Because he always comes on to me, he tells me that he wishes I would come on to him, I think maybe the way he acts puts me off. For example, sometimes he wants help finishing, and when I reject him, he responds with "I'm not asking for much" or "just give me a minute" or "you dont even have to do anything" or "just hug me while I do it," and then I will usually end up helping him. Just last night he started a sexual act, I said no and I sat up once, He may not have heard me or he didn't take me seriously, he stopped because I kept making comments that it was going to go in and he got frustrated, saying it wasn't going to. He said he didn't realize I wasn't in the mood and said I didn't give it enough time for it to start feeling good. Im not sure how doesn't know when I'm not interested. A little bit later he came on to me again wanting me to help him, and I told him im gonna start acting like him tomorrow. instead of him coming on to me, I will come on to him and will make similar comments and maybe then he would understand. he then kept begging for me to help him out because he thought I meant I would help him out tonight and got frustrated when I wouldn't, saying he wouldn't let him finish, he went to bed upset, the next morning when I woke up he put my hand on it and when I pulled my hand away, he said I thought you were supposed to start today and that he was waiting, I told him I usually don't feel very good in the morning, And we got into a little argument over all of it. he said things like, "he didn't get to finish last night" and I told him that when he does things like this, it makes me not want to do it. When I was done explaining to him He said "I guess I have a higher drive than you" what should I do? I try to explain to him my feelings

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Liveware_Failure t1_jegixup wrote

There's nothing about this that's ok. Pressuring someone into sex isn't something that you do to someone that you care about.

You're a person, not a vibrator, if he's horny tell him that he's got hands.

The issues here are pretty fundamental, it sounds like he barely sees you as a person, it's highly unlikely you're going to be able to 'fix' him. This dude is not ready for a healthy relationship.

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IkeSW t1_jegrbah wrote

Sounds like he's incredibly selfish sexually and that's also the reason you don't want to do anything. If you explained this to him and he's still not doing anything, why would you want to stay with him?

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