Submitted by ThrowRApleasehelpo t3_125fbrz in relationship_advice
ThrowRApleasehelpo OP t1_je3zpvg wrote
Reply to comment by Amar_Akbar_Anthony20 in Should I (19f) end things with my unemployed bf (24m) by ThrowRApleasehelpo
I just worry that it isn’t my place. I know in med school I will have to rely on my partner to handle the majority of responsibilities because I will be too busy with school, and I feel like I cannot trust him to do that. His mom gave him a time frame of when to find a job or she’d kick him out, and he did not meet it. I feel like he does not comprehend having a full time job and adult responsibilities. Is there anyway you’d prefer to be told about your partners expectations? I do not want to hurt him.
Amar_Akbar_Anthony20 t1_je406ix wrote
How is it not your place? Your his partner. And i can understand his moms approach if it hasn't clicked for him now. I don't think it will soon.
> I feel like he does not comprehend having a full time job and adult responsibilities
That is a big problem if you want to build a life and have a future together. Does he already handle responsibilities? Like household chores since he is at home?
I would prefer straight to the point and no beating around the bush. I think his feelings will be hurt anyways.
ThrowRApleasehelpo OP t1_je40fps wrote
Thank you for your help. I have tried to talk to him about it but seem to struggle with being direct due to not wanting to hurt his feelings. All I want for him is to have a fulfilling life and it saddens me to see how he doesn’t understand that his parents are having to financially support him and how he has options but doesn’t really see that he does. I spoke to him about my concern for med school and he believes he is capable of having a full time job while cooking, cleaning, etc while I study 12+ hours a day, however his actions now say otherwise. I appreciate you taking the time out of your day to help me gain clarity on this. I do agree with you and you’re incredibly helpful
Amar_Akbar_Anthony20 t1_je40kdz wrote
You are welcome. Goodluck talking to him.
>I spoke to him about my concern for med school and he believes he is capable of having a full time job while cooking, cleaning, etc while I study 12+ hours a day, however his actions now say otherwise
This is correct. Goodluck with this and with medical school. I hope the relationship can work out.
ThrowRApleasehelpo OP t1_je40lkg wrote
Thank you so much. 🥺
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