Me(22F) and him (23M), I’m going nuts.

Submitted by Civil-Finger6085 t3_126vw2g in relationship_advice

Long distance relationship, 7 months. After each argument acts like nothing happened and gaslights me. yday we had an argument, and as always I was trying to communicate my emotions. He called me crazy, ironic, hypocrite, cringe, laughed, mocked me, im making scenarios in my head, to grow up, enough of internet for today, i told him to quit whatever games he is trying to play on me with his gaslighting. I decided to cut ties with him. I told him i want to be alone. Now He is texting me non stop, calling me, I didn’t answer and he sent me this “Can we please talk I’m very confused I don’t know what’s going on”.

After the long argument and gaslighting and everything i explained yesterday, he says idk what’s going on? is this some kind of manipulation!! am i tripping!!!

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Dvusmnd t1_jeb8dw5 wrote

That sounds like sociopath behavior. You need to talk to him about this. If he responds with lack of empathy to your points then I think you should find someone that treasures your feelings and respects your boundaries.

Signs of a Sociopath Lack of empathy for others. Impulsive behavior. Attempting to control others with threats or aggression. Using intelligence, charm, or charisma to manipulate others. Not learning from mistakes or punishment. Lying for personal gain. Showing a tendency to physical violence and fights.

If you intend to stay in this relationship, you need to learn how to use verbal judo to communicate with a person like this. I would take extra precautions to avoid pregnancy cause the last thing you want is to have to coparent with someone like that.

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Civil-Finger6085 OP t1_jeb8y6q wrote

I already did!!! I broke up with him TWICE because of this!! he begged to take him back saying he will become a better person, but this happened yesterday.

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Dvusmnd t1_jebb0te wrote

What he means is he will do a better job of manipulating you into thinking he is doing better.

He has to recognize that he has a problem and work towards actually fixing himself. He is this way probably from some trauma he’s experienced but it’s very serious stuff.

People he does not respect he Will confidently manipulate or think he’s manipulating them. They can choose their own reality if it gets too bad. They convince themselves about what is really happening and gaslight others to fit that reality. It comes from a place of disrespect. You are not respected.

There are better humans available.

Find people who can be trustworthy, earn your respect and can be vulnerable and highly empathetic and you can avoid these types of people.

Hugs to you. You may have dodged a bullet.

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