Is my (28M) ex (25F) leading me on or is she seriously reconsidering?

Submitted by annoying690 t3_yipd6g in relationship_advice

Hello,

For the full story, you can see my post history. I'll give a condensed version here.

We were in a long distance relationship where one of the stipulations was that I (atheist) consider converting to Islam (her religion). She made this clear from the beginning before we started the relationship. A year and a half goes by, I visit her a few times, things are good. But I tended to waver in my commitment to thinking about converting, and the most recent time I said "I can't see myself converting" she decided to (rightfully) distance. Still texting but waaaaaay less.

Now here's the kicker: I did some soul searching and recently actually converted to Islam. I told her this and she still stayed neutral in her stance about wanting to (not) date anymore, but I've noticed some things.

She still calls me immediately if something stressful happens. She will send me random selfies. But if I try flirting she will get very upset and tell me that this isn't how we are anymore. Yet I've noticed in the past few days our texting frequency has increased (which also had to do with me stopping my desperate attempts and plans to win her back, and just being more chill).

So I'm confused. She said she doesn't know if she's ready for a relationship again (which I know usually means "...with you" but she is sincere, she's not the type of person to dilly dally or be mean). Sometimes she says I might need space and suggests not talking for a few weeks, but then she sends me cute selfies the next day.

What do I do? :(

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luvduvbunny t1_iujsrkp wrote

I don’t think she wants a relationship. She said she wants space

She doesn’t like it when you flirt with her, she just wants normal texts

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annoying690 OP t1_iujt4f3 wrote

Why wouldn't she just say that then instead of saying she's unsure?

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luvduvbunny t1_iujthw6 wrote

Women are taught to be passive when it comes to expressing what we want. Women don’t want to hurt people’s feelings, so it’s “better” to be passive.

So by saying she’s unsure, she’s not directly hurting your feelings.

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throwawayy6321 t1_iujv3cj wrote

Out of interest, was it just a coincidence that a precondition of you being with this woman was your conversion to Islam, and you actually converting to Islam?

What motivated your conversion specifically?

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