What do I (19f) do with his (24m) stuff?

Submitted by meqqhan t3_yipdee in relationship_advice

Background- Hi everyone, had a shitty relationship that lasted a week, he basically sweet talked me the whole time and did the bare minimum, we ended things and now he's seeing someone else even though he said he didn't have the space for a relationship in his life (even though he was the one who wanted the relationship in the first place and did all the pursuing).

He stayed at my place a few times and I have a bag of his clothes worth over $250, I packed his clothes two days before we ended things because I had already emotionally detached myself from him and realized he wasn't a very good person. On our last phone call I asked when he's going to pick up his stuff and he said we'd 'sort it out later'. We haven't talked in two weeks. Some part of me wants to donate it to a thrift store or sell it. I need to get rid of this giant trash bag full of his clothes. Please help. It was really important to him he would've collected his things.

I've thought about messaging him but he's horrible at replying to me and will give me some bullshit excuse to make me feel bad for bothering him since he's 'got so much on his plate'. I see that he's online all weekend playing videogames so I know for a fact he does have the time. I also don't ever want to see his face again or give him the satisfaction of seeing me one last time.

I realize I'm petty, but he lied to me so many times throughout the relationship and broke his promises and I have so much anger towards him, because he's never going to care that he hurt me like this.

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redditavenger2019 t1_iujsdbw wrote

Text him that his bag of clothes are outside next to the dumpster. He may want to hurry to pick it up. Then block him.

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meqqhan OP t1_iujsh6b wrote

This is hilarious thank you x-x

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luvduvbunny t1_iujsgzz wrote

Damn in one week he left his shit at your place?

I would give him one last curtesy message as a warning. Just say you’re going to get rid of his shit in X days/weeks

After you get rid of his shit and he gets upset, tell him he had a long time to get it. If he left it with you for so long, it must’ve not been important

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meqqhan OP t1_iujsoh1 wrote

I know... I thought it was a 'green flag' and meant he was in this for the long term... he would often speak in the future tense as well and i feel like he was just getting my hopes up to get me closer to him.

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luvduvbunny t1_iujtbfi wrote

I get it. A guy in his mid-20s showed interest in you

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yowen2000 t1_iujsvag wrote

I'd inform him that if he doesn't come to pick this stuff up by X date, it's going to be donated.

For X date pick whatever date you want the stuff gone by, if that's tomorrow, that's fine, you aren't his storage facility.

I know it's tempting to just dump it, but you'll have the high ground (you already do, but this is also for your own benefit, you'll personally feel like you gave him every opportunity) if he complains about this later, you will have given him every chance.

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meqqhan OP t1_iujtduj wrote

this is helpful, thank you!

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yowen2000 t1_iuju0xu wrote

You are welcome, you can look forward to reclaiming your space soon.

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curly_lox t1_iuk3wcg wrote

Send him a text telling him you will be getting rid of his stuff if he doesn't pick it up in, say, 5 days. If after the five days has passed and he hasn't picked it up, toss it.

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