Submitted by Api_theotter t3_yipdzc in relationship_advice

For context my boyfriend 22 male and I 20 female have been in a relationship for almost 7 months now and I know it’s funny to see a question like this pop up so early on in the relationship but that’s generally how I feel. Lately I’ve been feeling like my boyfriend is very hot and cold in the relationship, on some occasions I feel like our relationship is great and he loves me but some other days I feel like it’s absolutely not working out at all. It’s like I’m getting a minimum wage of his love.

He is no longer my person I want to go for when I’m in distress or feeling down, because I typically feel like a child who’s been reprimanded by their parents afterwards and not supported like I would like. It usually goes with him lecturing me on the matter and telling me what to do instead of him just listening to why I’m upset and caring for my needs then.

He does however try sometimes in the relationship, we have really great dates and he has all the great plans for a future with us but some days I don’t think he’s fully invested in me to do so.

He also mentioned to me that he lost the spark in our relationship when I feel the complete opposite. I do believe that the love I had for him in the beginning is even greater now. So I really would like to know how we can develop a better connection in this relationship or if I’m just hanging on to a fallen tree?

I would also like a few tips on how to bring this matter up as I have already done it like 2/3 weeks ago but now I want to let him know in a way that shows matters of grave concern

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NickDixon37 t1_iujsxi3 wrote

One option is to take better care of yourself - by staying away from him when you're feeling down - and doing other things that make you happy. This may (or may not) be a win-win thing, as taking a step back away from him, may prompt him to try to fix things. But if that doesn't happen, you'll at least be starting the process of becoming more independent.

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Logical-Wasabi7402 t1_iujtrth wrote

If he's treating you like a kid instead of a partner, it's time to let the relationship go.

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NarrowTrade3608 t1_iuk907p wrote

Fuck his friend and let him find out...I bet he want you more then

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