Yup. I was in a five year relationship and it was slow as mud. I ended it for several reasons (mostly I realized he didn’t even like me but whatever), took some time for me, and my current boyfriend and I already talk about the future. Plans to move in together (next year), moving cities when we’re done with school, a timeline for getting married and trying to start a family……it’s been a few months. It’s flourishing. The difference is astounding when someone is actually prepared to be your partner (and you’re prepared to be theirs) and not just your best buddy who you love a lot and then waste time to “see where things go.”

At most, I’d assume a year is enough to tell. Thoughts?

Yeah, that was my first thought. OP, 5 years is def a lot of chances for a relationship to flourish, so I think you are telling yourself lies here. You created this story of how the relationship just Had No Chances, which is simply not connected to reality. Please re-evaluate: why you are creating this narration, what is the purpose, and what is the truth? And how this truth changes things, when you realize what it is (spoiler: the relationship had tons of chances to flourish, but it just didn't. So maybe this man isn't actually your soulmate? just an example of things that may come to mind when you recognize the "we just had NO CHANCE to flourish" things is a total fabrication)

The dumped person always seems to feel like the other one just wasn't trying hard enough and was throwing away a potentially fantastic relationship. But the reality is, this is the potential running out. The fact that they want to break up means there's nowhere to go but down.