Submitted by 1015267 t3_xx53oe in relationship_advice

My(25M) gf(23f) has resurfaced an older issue we have in the relationship. When we first started dating I wanted kids. But the beginning of our relationship was pretty rough due to her being very ignorant of romantic relationships and treating it more like a roommate situation. Over that time I became unsure of if I wanted kids. The last year however has seen huge growth on her part. She randomly brought up the question of kids again about a month ago and has been having bad anxiety about our relationship because I can’t give her a straight answer. The problem is everything is so twisted up now. I don’t know if I do or don’t want kids. On top of that I’m not sure why I feel that way. If it’s from the early rough days of the relationship, if I’ve genuinely changed my mind about kids, or if I want kids but just not with her? One of my major concerns is that having a kid with her would involve another extremely long period of her being unintuitive about raising a kid and managing a relationship. I’m really struggling to sort it all out. The only things I know for sure is that I have to give her an answer soon and free her of the anxiety and that the answer will mean either a breakup or eventually marriage.

So how in the world can you sort out your feelings about children in this situation?

TL/DR: I have to decide if I want kids or not soon so my relationship can either end or stabilize and I honestly have no clue

E: oof I should have switched the genders so people didn’t automatically project all their feelings about bad boyfriends on me. I don’t hate her, I don’t discourage her, I don’t put her down or whatever’s other projection you’re putting on me. We have simply had a good but imperfect relationship that has reached an inflection point that I don’t have an answer for



You must log in or register to comment.

There's nothing here…